Why not a doorman?

kalamityjane

Hello, I'm new here and I have been wondering if any cuddlers have a man wait outside the place where they cuddle for protection?
For in home stripper services, they send a man with you who waits outside the door encase there are any problems. I would feel much safer if this were the case with this program. Id like to know your thoughts?

If you pay him , why not .   If you tack on the cost to the client I think you will price yourself out of business , but
maybe you can barter , you can give him a hug

BTW , I saw your headstone at deadwood gulch , on Boot Hill, except your first name was spelled with a "c"

greenearth2

I have never had a pro do this with me.  Except maybe one who i think had a friend wait in a car outside but didn't tell me.   
I understand the pro cuddler would feel safe but I wouldn't feel safe because I'm not paying much attention to my wallet and car keys during a cuddle session.  I always have this fear my money and car will be stolen while I'm busy cuddling.  
Its like going to meet strangers when you sell your car or something.   
On the other hand I do appreciate the need for safety.  So I am not sure what the solution is here that works for everyone.  

Morpheus

Would the client be made aware of the doorman?

kalamityjane

Fortunately I have many willing friends! I wouldn't want my client to feel uncomfortable so on my first experience I brought a friend who waited in the car nearby but it wasn't too obvious... I feel like its much safer though when the man is literally outside the door like at the stripper gig.

It seems like it would keep the peace best if the person was aware at least if it was someone right outside the door but for someone in the car I don't think that's necessary to tell them.

Greenearth I could see why that would be unsettling if the doorman was standing say- outside the bedroom door- however I can't really understand why it would make one feel unsafe if they were locked outside of the apartment/house etc.

Morpheus

I'm not letting a man stand outside my house while I'm cuddling and if I went to a pros house and there was a man standing outside, I would leave.

greenearth2

Oh I didn't realize the door would be locked.  
My assumption was the door wouldn't be locked so this guy could rush in at any time.  I suppose for the first session i would be ok with it.   However maybe at a discount.  Because honestly the idea of some guy waiting outside the door incase I do something bad just feels weird to me.    
I do understand that pros deal with a lot of creeps so I am not trying to be insensitive to that.   But just expressing my feeling that the obvious lack of trust would not make me feel very good.   But maybe just the first session I guess.  If you needed it for every future session with the same client I just think that would not show much trust.   
I do respect all the pro cuddlers I see and value the trust they show me and I trust them as well !  

kalamityjane

Yes after a respectful first session I dont think this would cross my mind. And honestly if the client has good karma i don't see this as much of an issue.

Thanks for all of your input!

If I came and someone was outside the door, I would also probably leave as well. But for me the first meeting would be in public anyway.  no private residences or hotels.  I don't really like the doorman idea unless i bring my own 2nd person.

greenearth2

Oh goodness.  Two doormen!!?  Lol. That would be something f

I'll be your doorman greenearth

Morpheus

 He will be your backdoor man 

Lol

greenearth2

Yeah no thanks! 

snuggle554321

If you have somebody who is willing to wait in a car for you then I would do that.  I would still use that back up person even if someone has good karma.  If you have that option just keep using your back up person until you feel extremely comfortable with that new client. But if I were you I would use that option every time I see someone new.  If they're just waiting in the car I wouldn't see a need to let anyone know but if they were going to be waiting outside then they would probably need to know so they don't think  there is  some kind of stalker outside!  It's really awesome that you have that kind of back up and support!  You are really lucky! HUGE HUG!!!! 

Morpheus

How would pros feel if clients started bringing a doorman? 

I well be honest, though I appreciate a pros need for security, it would only heighten my own apprehension.... scam set up etc....

snuggle554321

@dekooning That's why I don't think that  having your back up person waiting at the door would probably make the client feel comfortable.  If a pro has someone who drives them there and parks close by so if they hear a commotion in case they need to respond quickly, I can see that. The client wouldn't need to know and the pro would have a bit more peace of mind when going to a strange location. With that in mind, a client could also have a buddy waiting in a car outside in case he is concerned about something going down. But as long as there isn't a need for either back up person to come to the door, they should both stay in the car. 

greenearth2

I definitely like the idea better of having someone waiting in a car nearby.  
But if I found a pro was doing that even after several sessions I would feel really bad at the lack of trust at that point.  So better to keep it quiet.    

Morpheus

The original poster mentioned strippers. I talked to a friend of mine who used to do security for strippers and he said the girls would be miced and he would listen in on the session. Is that some kind of invasion of privacy if they don't make the client aware?

greenearth2

Oh yikes...ok no I wouldn't want THAT much monitoring. omg 

 The terms of service agreement clearly states that a professional is permitted to carry and/or use a non-lethal type of protection.  Which to me and, hopefully also to every client, is an indication from the beginning that there is some already known and established risk involved for professionals in this line of work. AND that is taken seriously enough by the owner of this site for it to have made it into the terms of service agreement.  I carry two forms plus being skilled in many disciplines of Martial arts.  But that's me on a regular day, I'm trained to use them and I am also not one to mess with at the gun range.   I do not own a firearm nor do I feel the need to carry one, but my targets at the end of the afternoon at the gun range reflect the teachings and skill of my brother who was a Marine and a sharp shoot. 

Some could even interpret the fact that this clause made it into the terms of service agreement as a firm warning not to push boundaries from the beginning, because there could be any range of non-lethal consequences, but as many people have stated through their own personal experience with boundaries definitely being pushed, some people only read or comprehend what they want to read or comprehend.  If the rules were being taken seriously we wouldn't have to have such extensive conversation about them, would we? 

People can interpret that non-lethal protection as Mace, a whistle or some kind of sharp sound device, some kind of hitting device or the use of Martial arts, could be a bodyguard also, or pretty much any other form of protection that doesn't result in death… in some places it is legal to carry a Taser and in some places it is not. There is a very broad meaning of "non-lethal" self protection...but it is spelled out in the terms of service that a professional has a right to defend her safety. 

NOTE NUMBER 15...


CuddleComfort.com Client Service Agreement

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Session Rules

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greenearth2

Spamming: Spam is typically considered to be repetitive posting of the same text again and again 

I suggest just posting a link next time please.

Morpheus

All of those items can potentially be lethal. I don't allow violent weapons in my home which is a place of peace. I should let pros know that in the future since I almost always host.

 Most people are extremely peaceful, and most people feel they will be treated peacefully… unless they are groped, humped, attacked, sexually assaulted or otherwise feel like they are being threatened or in harms way. And there's no argument that it happens and has happened.  It is clearly stated in the terms of service that a professional has a right to carry a nonlethal form of protection AND that by using this site each person has to agree to ALL of those things according to the terms of service. So are you saying you would be willingly not abiding by the terms of service? 

 Or more specifically, do you feel your rights override the right of a woman or professional cuddler to feel safe?  Just because you have stated you don't do these things, that doesn't mean my post was about you or directed at you.  None of them ever are unless I specifically name you or use specific words that you have previously used in your own posts to state my point. This is a general forum where hundreds if not sometimes thousands of people read.  Perhaps you should not take each general post so personally. Unless you are specifically addressed or tagged, but seriously it's not always about you.  This thing you are doing is called "centering" and its really confusing to most why you seem to feel "personally attacked" by almost every general post. 

The pro has the right yes , to carry the specific weapon , I would say the the host , could inform the pro , that he will agree to the CSA , with exception to the weapon provision , giving the visiting pro , the option , of attending the session unarmed , or just not at all .  

Morpheus

HUGEHUGS!!!

greenearth2

If a pro has the right to carry a weapon then so does a client.  
A woman with a gun is just as deadly as a man with a gun.   Just watch reality shows of prison.  Plenty of women who kill men and women in there.  Too often women are assumed to be more peaceful and trustworthy but they aren't any more trustworthy than a guy.   
So if a woman shows up to a hotel room with a knife or a gun I'm kinda worried.   
Maybe a public meeting first.  If she still thinks I'm a threat we Can call it off.   I have had plenty of pro cuddlers see me by themselves without weaponry.   So I don't need to spend money on a pro who is so scared of me she needs a weapon on her at all times around me like I was a dangerous individual.   

Morpheus

I was gonna comment but decided to just say................


.......HUGEHUGS!!!!!!!!!!!

funandadventure

Please do remember the whole world is seeing what you put on here.
John Auckland NZ