Obscuring RT identity for CC?

UCpaaHVg6u0UCpaaHVg6u0
in General

First, I want to say that I've been reluctant to be a part of the regulars conversing in this forum, although for months I've been playing with it. I'm conflicted and fearful, like a cat! I'm almost a senior citizen so this trait is pretty hardwired by now. Anyway, I've been wondering what others here feel about family, friends, coworkers, and people at large knowing about them as members here. In particular, as a man who somewhat regularly uses professional cuddling services through a CC member, I feel really inhibited about anybody except a very select few friends knowing. I'm sure there will be a range of answers, that is if more than a few people respond. To reiterate the question: Do you worry about others knowing that you are in this community?

  1. Do you like cats?32 votes
    1. Of course!
      59.38%
    2. Yes, but I'm allergic to them
      25.00%
    3. No. I'm an unhappy person
      15.63%
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Comments

  • UCpaaHVg6u0UCpaaHVg6u0



    Just a few of the cats I saw in Turkey a couple years ago. They go where they please, and when they move in to a place, people usually make them welcome!

  • Rocket_ManRocket_Man
    edited March 2021

    I better like them because i have one. I inherited her when my sister could not take care of her. She is 11 already and i have had her for 9.5 years. Not sure where all that time went because all i did was blink my eyes and it was gone.

  • [Deleted User]DarrenWalker (deleted user)

    I don't worry. Family, friends, coworkers, neighbors—heck, what difference would it make if every person on earth knew I like cuddling enough that I'll make a profile online to meet other folks who like it too?

    The only thing it could do, I figure, is make it easier for me to find cuddle buddies. No worries there.

    (Also, despite being a generally upbeat individual, I don't much care for pets that can't make me dinner every once in a while, maybe do some cleaning, fold the laundry, etc.

    Still, I don't dislike cats... so long as they're not mine.)

  • UCpaaHVg6u0UCpaaHVg6u0

    @Rocket_Man Now, being a pro is something I feel could be adequately explained to the average person. I know for myself that it's therapeutic. In my own checkered past, my use of personal services wasn't always for a higher purpose. That's probably the crux of the biscuit for me. I've been away from drugs and alcohol longer than most people have been alive, and I've evolved a little, yet I'm still feeling guilty and secretive about paying a pro here. I'm not sexualizing it... It's something that helps me get to a more relaxed place for a few days afterwards. Not that different from therapeutic massage, which is my own field since the last several years.

  • UCpaaHVg6u0UCpaaHVg6u0

    @DarrenWalker I have to say that I envy your ability to be free of the fears that I'm having.

  • [Deleted User]Mmart (deleted user)

    @UCpaaHVg6u0
    My family and friends know that I am part of this community. Like many other things some accept it, some don't care one way or the other, and some think it us weird. BTW all if their reactions were totally predictable.
    I like cats.

  • UCpaaHVg6u0UCpaaHVg6u0

    @Mmart What you're telling me suggests there might be some positive growth by being more open with others. It's a leap of faith.

  • [Deleted User]squeakytoy (deleted user)

    Oh, I don't give a crap if people find out I'm on this site. This is probably the most wholesome thing I do online :mrgreen:

    But I do understand how people might be embarrassed about it. It does take a certain amount of vulnerability to be here and be willing to show your face.

  • [Deleted User]DarrenWalker (deleted user)
    edited March 2021

    @UCpaaHVg6u0: It maybe comes with being young and brash.

    I don't have any negative ideas associated with paying for intimacy, so long as everyone involved is happy about it. So if other people think cuddling, of all things, is horrible and ostracism-worthy... well, they're wrong, that's all.

    And I wouldn't expect most people to be that wrong. Especially not the folks who're most important to me.

    @squeakytoy: Now I'm curious about what all else you get up to on the interwebs.

  • UCpaaHVg6u0UCpaaHVg6u0

    @squeakytoy 😂 Thank you! Given my aforementioned checkered past, I feel in some ways like a parolee, walking on eggshells. I need to let that crap go already!

  • JasonCuddlesJasonCuddles
    edited March 2021

    I don't advertise it, I don't advertise other things either.... But I am not worried if people know.

  • pmvinespmvines

    I dont really get into my personal business with most people. Like most things in my life it's a need to know basis . I also dont tell family, friends , co workers etc about other intimate details of my conversing and activities and events . What a do with a person is by nature my business and my privacy is a boundary i do not budge on

  • [Deleted User]DarrenWalker (deleted user)

    @pmvines: Well, I don't go out of my way to tell people I cuddle, either. But I don't worry about them finding out. Which, if you recall, was the original question.

  • Lev136Lev136

    I personally keep cuddling secret from most friends and all family. It's still not understood in today's culture. If someone recognized me I would have to explain what it is. That hasn't happened to me yet.

  • [Deleted User]Mmart (deleted user)

    @ucd
    I guess I can only say be you and be true to yourself. It is hard enough to live one life much less everyone else's.
    BTW if you think you are the only one with a checkered past I would like to discuss you purchasing this big old bridge I own.

  • TheFunCartelTheFunCartel

    I don’t have a checkered past because I preferred pinstripes.

  • [Deleted User]Mmart (deleted user)

    My last comment was meant for @UCpaaHVg6u0.
    I have big fingers.

  • ChefKateChefKate

    @UCpaaHVg6u0 I don't necessarily worry about people knowing. The way I make my decision is if I want to deal with their most likely response(es). For example, I currently reside at my parents house yet they know nothing of my cuddle exploits. They know I'm going to hang out with a friend, which area of town, and when I think I'll be home, mainly because I think that's a common courtesy to give to anyone you live with. But I know there would be looks and comments, and my mom especially would purposefully make off hand comments until I engage and then she could go full force with her disapproval. My niece's response when I told her was, "are you f*cking crazy?". But she accepts it and totally doesn't understand it. I'm like @DarrenWalker (except when dealing with the parents) where I don't hide it but I also don't go out of my way to make people aware of it.

    Though I have been kicking around a few design ideas for cuddle shirts. Similar to the Free Hugs campaign a few years back.

  • UCpaaHVg6u0UCpaaHVg6u0

    @pmvines @Lev136 That validate the way I have been handling it. I don't feel that everybody automatically has a right to my business.
    @Mmart @FunCartel These days I'm wearing jeans or khakis.

  • UCpaaHVg6u0UCpaaHVg6u0

    @ChefKate You should do that. Seems like a merchandise button is likely for here sooner or later.

  • 11jae1111jae11

    I'm a widower so they encourage any social interaction i get. I don't wanna date, just wanna hug so this group fills a niche for me. Also....lol l'm over what anyone thinks of me. It's been incredibly liberating.

  • littermatelittermate

    I don't worry, period.
    I don't care who knows in my personal world.
    I am very private when it come to my profession and keeping my private life private. Therefore I ask those who friend me and then can see my pics to keep it confidential that they met me here, as it's a small world.

  • littermatelittermate

    @11jae11 I love "I am somewhere between a particle and a wave."

  • [Deleted User]squeakytoy (deleted user)

    @littermate Have you been a photon this whole time?!

    @DarrenWalker Having this knowledge would be like catching a glimpse of Cthulu. I cannot answer in good conscience :innocent:

  • GentleMan1111GentleMan1111

    I love cats!
    Funny, I found this site at a low point in my life when I really needed to be held and my wife was going through a major health/medical crisis. I was taking care of her and needed someone to take care of me. I approached one of my best female friends about cuddling me and she had to decline due to bad experiences with men over the years. I totally understood that but when I told her later that I found this site and was considering hiring a pro she told me I shouldn't have to pay someone to cuddle me. WTF? But I've told a few other people, and they don't really give a damn but they don't really understand it either. At times I don't really understand my own needs for cuddling, and feel like I wish I could make it go away. Life would be alot easier if I could. Drugs worked for awhile but I decided I needed to live awhile yet lol.

  • [Deleted User]DarrenWalker (deleted user)

    @squeakytoy: Bother.

    Well, wait—what about in bad conscience, then? Trade you for metaphorical glimmers of Nyarlathotep.

    ...In private, so no one else goes mad.

  • littermatelittermate
    edited March 2021

    @squeakytoy You discovered my secret!

    I might now have to change my profile photo to be more accurate.
    (And please: I'm really sensitive about being called four-eyes.)

  • [Deleted User]squeakytoy (deleted user)
    edited March 2021

    I'm really sensitive about being called four-eyes.

    @littermate Would you say you're... photosensitive about it? :mrgreen:

    @DarrenWalker Yes, I could tell you in bad conscience! Now I feel like I've built this up so much that you'd be disappointed with the actual answers, though. :joy: I feel kinda bad. I don't do anything THAT crazy, really!

  • [Deleted User]DarrenWalker (deleted user)

    @squeakytoy: Hahaha! Neither do I, really.... Fair trade, I guess!

  • ChefKateChefKate

    @GentleMan1111 I bet 30 or so years ago your friend would have made the same comment about getting a massage. Back then, and sometimes even now, a massage is seen as a code word for sexual relations. You can't help what other people think. I wonder though if your friend didn't take what you asked for at face value? It's weird being a woman sometimes, sigh. 😺

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