Traveling to cuddle (clarification)

denverhigh

To all pros and non pro cuddlers. Should someone that is wanting to set an appt to cuddle with you and wants you to come to their city, pay for the travel and place to stay and also the cuddle fee? Let me make this simpler. Should a plane ticket and room be payment enough or should a client pay the hourly fee for cuddling as well.

CuddleWho

pay for the travel and place to stay and also the cuddle fee? Or is the travel and place to stay fair enough?

Seems blindingly obvious that in general you should expect to pay for all expenses in addition to the cuddle fee.

If the pro expects to make a profit from her cuddles in her own city, presumably she also expects to make a profit from her cuddles if she's going to go through all the time and effort to cuddle in a different city.

I’m new to this and perhaps confused by the wording. If I travel to non-pro or vice versa, costs should be shared. If I travel to a pro or vice versa, I occur all costs. Only should have a cuddle fee for a pro.

b0nfire

As a pro, I would expect the travel costs to be paid by the client in addition to the cuddle fee if I were traveling for a cuddle. I suppose everyone is different and, depending on what y’all agree to, pros may work with you on a discount, but per the client terms, it’s expected that both the travel costs and the fee would be paid by the client.

Amortentia

So yeah if you are dealing with a pro then expect to pay for everything. If you are dealing with an enthusiast then there should be a compromise. The person who does the travel can pay for their own gas and the other person can pay for hotel. Just one example there. I know personally cuddlers from other parts of my state (as well as outside my state) have offered to pay for my travel. I turn it down always. Maybe if I was a fulltime cuddler I might but as a part time cuddler doing this outside of my normal fulltime job, I only cuddle in my area and am fairly strict on that. So yeah it also depends on if that person would even travel. Read their profile first, it can help!

CuddleDuncan

If you are a client in any field you pay for everything. That's how 'being a client' works.

If two enthusiasts are meeting, then costs should be shared in some appropriate way.

When hiring cuddle professionals, a good rule of thumb is to think about hiring a lawyer or accountant. If you wouldn't say it to (or expect it of) a lawyer, don't say it to a professional cuddler. Aside from the obvious exceptions of course.

In the cuddling community it is generally considered unwise to visit a distant city for cuddling purposes because it is risky. Exceptions include professional cuddlers on tour and cuddling somebody you have met many times and know well.

pmvines

So then find a local pro. Not sure why you are talking like you are going to be trafficking them in from the four corners.

denverhigh

Pmvines? What are you talking about? Calm down bro. It was just a question. No one said anything about trafficking. I was actually asking because someone I know that is a cuddler went to visit someone that paid the airfare and told the cuddler once they were done that him paying the fair was fair enough.

pmvines

@denverhigh I am very calm , particularly at this moment . If you dont feel you should have to pay a pros travel expenses etc then find someone local to you

TheMidnightOwl

Lol I agree with @pmvines But I am also of the mindset to never pay for anything I can get for free.

denverhigh

Pm read the thread again. I also told you I was asking about someone that it happend to. It was just a topic of discussion. The topic was coming from the cuddlers point of view not the client.

pmvines

Okie dokie

valkyrievixen

@denverhigh I understood what you were asking, and I don’t feel like you were talking like you were going to be trafficking them in from the four corners. 🙄 It’s a fair/fare question and something that I’ve run into often with people trying to book. Please let your friend know that this is a red flag. Just covering the airfare is not fair...at all.

If it was a cuddler from this site, they should be reported. I hope she is able to get things worked out.

denverhigh

Thank you valky for actually answering as a provider.

MCcuddles2

I don't think that anything the dude said sounded like trafficking either. Kind of absurd and weird that that was even brought up.

As for the question, you should always assume to pay the stated cuddling fee unless explicitly told otherwise.

denverhigh

Ty MC

Bella_Sera

@denverhigh

Yes, not only should she report the client to the website, she may also choose to file a police report if the client refused to pay for contracted services. Depending on the state, it may qualify as theft of services. I know if I were traveling for an overnight cuddle in a city I had to get to by plane, my fee would likely be over $1,000, so it could constitute a felony, depending on local laws.

Ladies, this is why you ask for payment up front, AND if you do travel, you get a deposit before you leave your house.

oberon

Looks like they're may have been a misunderstanding about the word trafficking. I don't think he was using it in a human trafficking sense just as bringing people into town sense.

denverhigh

@oberon What other way would that be taken?

Lovelight

I'd say for non pros, how to make that happen is up to the individuals involved.

As an enthusiast, I wouldn't feel comfortable going out of my way so much and depending on someone else heavily like that especially if a near stranger. Unless I also have my own way and a back up plan.

oberon

@denverhigh i stated the alternate interpretation right there. Re read the post and substitute trucking for trafficking and see the difference.

ThomSSI

I’ve been fortunate enough to meet with some wonderful pros from out of state who happened to be traveling to my area or who was already here.

If, on the other hand, I reached out to a pro whose profile indicated a willingness to travel I’d absolutely feel obligated to cover travel-related expenses (flight, per diem for food etc., and likely time as well). I do freelance work as well (not of this sort-- and it’s what I expect when I travel out of town/state to a client. @BellaSera is right -- a deposit or partial payment of all that I mentioned plus enough for expenses on the return trip would be the minimum I’d accept.

The pro you mention had every right to be compensated for travel and for her/his session.

FWIW I’d rather travel to see a pro and get the added benefit of enjoying a road trip or train trip than spending the money for someone to come to me.

denverhigh

@oberon I’m not trying to guess what people mean. I’m reading what is written.

pmvines

@denverhigh to be clear, I used the word trafficking as an exaggeration. I do not feel that is what you meant. It was not intended to be taken literally. If that is how you took it then that is my bad . Your post is about people flying in cuddlers etc. Perhaps I could have used a different term .

denverhigh

@pmvines water under the bridge. Don’t trip

Bella_Sera

Not to poke the bear, (I realize @pmvines was using extreme language for effect), but what happened to that woman does meet the minimum criteria for human trafficking as described by the United Nations and the Department of Homeland Security. According to DHS:

Human trafficking involves the use of force, fraud, or coercion to obtain some type of labor or commercial sex act. Every year, millions of men, women, and children are trafficked worldwide – including right here in the United States. It can happen in any community and victims can be any age, race, gender, or nationality. Traffickers might use violence, manipulation, or false promises of well-paying jobs or romantic relationships to lure victims into trafficking situations.

This pro cuddler was manipulated into traveling far from home with promises of lucrative wages and coerced into providing free labor. I would wager she didn’t report this crime due to the shaming tactics of the client, the stigma attached to pro cuddling in some communities, and worry about potential reputational consequences or false prosecution by law enforcement.

@denverhigh seems to indicate that this cuddler made it home safely—and thank goodness for that! If all she lost was time, she is very lucky, but this is one among many reasons that seasoned pros like @Envie spend time and energy cautioning new pros about scams and traffickers. Many thanks to her and others that take safety so seriously.

[edited to fix autocorrects and to change “girl” to “woman” because internalized misogyny]

RubenAlvarez05

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