This is a term I’ve not heard before, but describes very well the reason for the need of this site to exist.
Quite right.
I agree with the condition, but I think I prefer the term touch deprivation. Skin hunger sounds cannibalistic somehow.
Never heard of the term, but I'm well aware of the condition itself. Probably one of those side effects of the pandemic that's never really thought about, except by those feeling it.
Yes! For me that experience has been almost painful. You start to think about touch like its a big juicy burger and you are starving.
@MxSmith
Black cat club and also Denver! I have a black cat as well and absolutely adore Denver.
"For me that experience has been almost painful. You start to think about touch like its a big juicy burger and you are starving."
I think that's where I'm at. My position in life has me pretty isolated and loneliness has become a thing. Never thought it had a term, though. Pretty interested to read about it.
This term here (along with general loneliness and lack of friendship in a new city) is exactly why I got into cuddling this Spring, and it has been one of the best decisions that I made this year to reach out.
@nurturingman
"I think I prefer the term touch deprivation."
I know, right.
@Tranquilescape I kind of hate that I love cuddles or that my body desires it. Ugh, irksome. -_-
Though, I try not to dwell on hate as that's a waste of energy. When life gives you a 'need' for cuddles... I have no idea. Find someone or things to help meet those desires, I guess.
To add the perspective of somebody who does not suffer from a lack of touch at home: I feel the need for more touch than what I share with my husband and pets. During quarantine, I found myself missing handshakes and hugs with both strangers and friends.
I mean, I prefer to call it touch deprivation, but the concept remains the same. Skin Hunger sounds like something you would hear in a JD Salinger novel...
I found the term from a facebook Cuddle Group admin. I hadn’t heard it before either. I also prefer touch deprivation, but when your stomach is empty do you say “ I have food deprivation” or do you just say “my stomach is hungry?” I think this is what the term was meant to sound like. I can see where it could sound misunderstood, but our skin is the largest organ we have and since finding this magnificent art of physical touch, I can see the use of the term “skin hunger” as being a good way to describe it.
Skin hunger (or touch deprivation) could those be the main reasons for the need of this site to exist? One thing I believe (& see common) is loneliness & lack of social life, and/or romantic life… (by romantic life I do not mean a sexual-intimate life)
Chi exchange or hug deprived. Skin hunger is a little too visceral for me. It's a whole body spiritual exchange.
I heard the term when I was in a cuddle party, back in 97, I'm agree with @nurturingman ,"Skin hunger sounds cannibalistic somehow"; Agree with all of you guys n gals, touch deprivation is another term that can be used; @MxSmith "think about touch like its a big juicy burger and you are starving", that exactly how I feel, after 2 to 3 hours of cuddling, I am still feeling hungry!
I agree with @nurturingman but I also get it totally. Being deprived of human touch so long and then getting it has kinda made me realize I was starving and hungry so it does make sense, just sounds cannibalistic. Hannibal Lecterish! @MxSmith big juicy burger!! I like that visualization but cuddles sounds like being enveloped into a soft cozy yummy taco🤩
I think cuddles wins hands down !! @cuddles_ndream in response to your response!😂
@Tranquilescape 🙌🏼🙌🏼
I have a hunger for potatoe skins
@pmvines loaded? Or how do you like yours?😂
Hushhhh @Melomaniac9 (to your response of my response 😅😂😂)
@Saysoh ❤❤ I miss my cat so much. Come to Denver? I'm going end of August.
@Melomaniac9 tacos do sound like the level of coziness I want for my cuddles... maybe grilled cheese level too? Or thick pancakes. I kinda like the idea of measuring someone's cuddle needs with food. What level are you at today? Chicken noodle soup or Turkey dinner?
@Tranquilescape a lot of people responding negatively to the term itself but I have extensively considered the correlation between literal food hunger and the need for touch before, based on repeatable experiences and observations that confirm the correlation. To the extent that it made me really think about the hierarchy of human needs vs. desires/wants. Suffice to say, I believe the term is apt and not at all ridiculous.
"Skin hunger" conveys the desperation that comes with long-term absence from touch. My life changed a bit when I became a massage therapist. While many clients seek relief from muscle discomfort, a significant portion of people seem to just want to be touched, perhaps to feel affection. I respect privacy enough to avoid satisfying my curiosity, but my suspicion is that sometimes partners don't agree on intimacy, and that I'm seeing a few who require more touch in their lives. Honestly, it's a lovely experience being a provider of touch to somebody in dire need.
After reading some more of these comments I checked within to remember what it feels like when I really need touch and I realized it can feel like my skin is hungry— not that I’m hungry for skin! 😂 Grammatically speaking, it seems “hungry skinned” would fit this logic better than “skin hungry,” but I know “hungry skinnedness“ doesn’t sound as good a “skin hunger,” hence the ambiguous but more mellifluous term.
Fun fact: while looking up word starve, because I was thinking of touch starvation, I found out that the archaic meaning of to starve is “to die from cold” or “to kill with cold” (https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/starve). This tracks with how I have felt when my skin was starved: cold, or “left out in the cold.” And what is one remedy for being cold? Getting under the bedcovers or putting on a sweater. I feel like cuddling with another person (or even with an animal) is like being covered and warmed. This reminded me of how I like to sleep with at least a sheet over me even when it’s hot. I guess that’s what my skin is hungry for… 🤔
Your input is very valuable. @22cuddle @UCpaaHVg6u0 @nurturingman 😌 🤗
Skin hunger 🤔 I think I like it. It sounds almost... primal. I think it conveys how touch is a basic human need- like hunger for food. Although the comments saying it sounds canibalistic do make me question myself!
@simone825 touch deprivation is also a very great way to describe it and probably what I prefer now. I just thought “skin hunger” was a different way to describe it. Cannibalism never crossed my mind, until I saw what everyone was posting here. I now don’t see it the way I did originally. I don’t tend to look at the dark side of things. I guess we need to be careful when posting, since there are many avenues, definitions and meanings to phrases or words.
@simone825
“Primal” is absolutely correct, which is one of the many reasons that open communication and forthright consent are so important in the dynamics of a cuddling relationship, however brief or ongoing that relationship is.
When dealing with the primal as civilized and kind humans it is best to move slowly, act cautiously, and behave with near sacred respectfulness.
And once all that’s been accomplished, snuggle like you are a small thing clinging to a spinning rock, orbiting an immense ball of fire, surrounded by the deadly vacuum of space.
It’s a crazy world, and we all need a hug.
😉🫂❤️
@cuddles_ndream 🤪🤪
@MxSmith sll those sound great! What about a burrito blanket? My SIL wraps up my nephew like a burrito and cuddles him he is extremely hyper and his therapist told her to try that! It has an immediate visceral reaction you can see him becoming a soft noodle lol Today I’m in starvation mode a bit hangry from lack of cuddles 😭 I’m probably going to be in Denver too🤩would live to say hi!
@nurturingman @UCpaaHVg6u0 @CharlesThePoet @simone825 on point totally
You know how there are certain foods you can gorge yourself on, but 30 minutes later you're hungry again? That's the kind of skin hunger scenario I get!
If I haven't been eating (cuddling) I'm fine... but if I have been and stop... It's shortly after (usually within 10 to 20 minutes) I start getting severe (skin hunger) pains. It shows up mostly in my legs as a dull ache that deepens without pressure or touch, and sometimes my arms will ache like that too. As time passes it all calms down, but I suppose it's always kind of there to some degree.
Anyway, enough about me...
I saw this article title mentioned within a post by @CuddleDuncan over in the Pros section, and thought others here might like to read this person's story... A Dire Case of Skin Hunger...
:: edited typos ~ whoops ::
@quixotic_life I couldn’t have put it better!! It’s like your body gets used to starvation mode and it functions fine! But once you feed that damn monster it kinda gets insatiable!! Like a damn shark that smelled blood😂😂 (Jaws music playing in my head)
I’m glad you feel that too!! I thought I was loosing my mind lol That article is spot on! Pre Covid I was fine, cause I hugged everyone, strangers too! @CuddleDuncan thank you for posting
https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2021/jan/24/lost-touch-how-a-year-without-hugs-affects-our-mental-health
