Yeah no, don't let anyone convince you that video calling to see who you're meeting is "bad practice".
"someone on video call he might sound and look scary and he is innocent that's judging"
Call it whatever you want. There's no reason for someone to sound and look scary on a video call. If someone sounds and looks scary then people have every right to end the call and go on with their lives. Nobody owes you their time and certainly not if you aren't being cordial.
That's judging if she's a pro customers not stupid enough to be judged and have their time been wasted, it just shows you are unqualified pro and a bad impression, it's disease of doughts on everyone if average person it's your choice and rights. If the pro have phobia it's not her profession customers want to feel comfortable not criminals otherwise they feel offended,uncomfortable and its your lose not theirs they will find a different pro simple don't judge the book by it's cover I'm just an adviser example about someone makes me uncomfortable i booked a session with therapist she told me to pay first and she seems worried i wouldn't pay i just said by by her time been wasted and my time been wasted she just lost money and a customer and if a pro told me let's talk video call first by by i don't have time for been judged i need run for my life it's just an advice
Yet again, whatever safety measures anyone needs to take to feel comfortable are essentially boundaries, and are entirely personal choice.
So long as they are openly and honestly communicated, so that all parties can make informed consent, that is really all that matters.
A pro cuddler has just as much right to feel comfortable and take a step back if something feels off. Paying someone doesn't take away their right to safety and consent.
@CharlesThePoet whatever you said it's true but in a professional manner any way not just to make customers feel been judged and look criminals if she's a pro if average person it's her choice
@Ahmedali999 and @Cntrydance28340 I completely understand. These are all valid and important points and hopefully productive conversations such as these will compel us to continue to create acceptable and practical processes or procedures to ensure our mutual safety and cultivate grounds for the very best cuddle experiences possible. I will say I am grateful for the freedom this site enables us to employ with respect to choosing our own policies ect, and even more grateful for trusted repeat clients.
@Touch_You_Crave i agree in some cultures the best way to find out about person through his families,colleagues,neighbours hood talking to the person he might sounds cute,sweat and he's very dangerous also the customer will take it personal that he will be judged if a pro she's very worried been a cuddler it's not her profession i have been to different pro only 1 was nervous and it made me uncomfortable so i I don't see her again i want feel comfortable.
I would tell you that your best weapon in the safety game is info. Video chat over Zoom with new clients and record it. Let them know it is recorded. Drivers License required. This a cuddle community. If you aren’t doing anything wrong you should not worry about your license. Lastly I would make all first timers host in a place you feel comfortable. Nice Hotel. Give room number to a friend. Don’t give your home address until you have cuddled with them once or twice. You can tell a lot during a session. Be safe. I hope this helps.
@relaxtoday221 very well said!
@relaxtoday221 i listen to crime stories some criminals don't commit crime frist second time it could be 10th time or after 1 year the person u trust could be dangerous and your idea amazing but customers wouldn't have time to follow it it's like job interview and waiting for decision clients want feel comfortable they don't want someone over protective or nervous.
For pros, this has gotta be one of the most dangerous gigs. You're being paid by someone to get in bed with them. You don't know what their intentions are. Ted Bundy seemed like a nice guy until he killed multiple women.
@Ahmedali999 I agree with your sentiments. If someone that uncomfortable and making you jump thru hoops and ladders to just cuddle. I probably will not waste my time chasing for them for a cuddle. I always wonder of drake, captain America or Thor was the guy wanting the cuddle on the other end. Would he need to video chat or other pre requisite requirements . Probably not. If you treat folks like a celebrity on here you will be treated surely as a fan
@timetocuddle07 it's like you applying for job in ministry, getting interview through video chat, wait for decision maybe you end up not getting a cuddle pro will lose not clients they will find someone else a pro has to be brave enough to meet strangers and take the risk she has to protect herself not over protect clients want feel comfortable if meet her for cuddle maybe she's worried anytime i do something bad at the same time I'm uncomfortable unhappy can't get my money back for bad service if it's not her profession she shouldn't do it in first place making money from unhappy clients and they are the victims can't get their money back. It's better to get security guard u will make more money.
I appreciate the concern you all show toward women’s safety, truly, but I just want to interject and say that, by and large, the people in this community are lovely, well-intentioned, and here seeking meaningful human connection.
Out of literally hundreds of session booked here and through other websites, I have had only 3 which I would classify as truly negative experiences—a rate of less than 2%.
That is not to say that every interaction is positive. As a pro, I certainly encounter my share of folks who cancel last minute, fail to pay, and make pervy comments or requests, but they’re not the majority and can usually be filtered out at the messaging stage by asking good screening questions and setting clear boundaries.
I’m not saying that cuddlers should not exercise due caution and use systems like check-in buddies, cell-phone tracking apps, and security cameras to protect themselves, but the idea of bringing a gun to a cuddle is definitely a bit much.
Even texting your check-in buddy every 20 min seems ludicrous and is just asking for trouble—what if you’re engrossed in a movie and forget? What if you doze off? Now the cops have arrived…
Cuddlers should ask for names and a recent photo. They should let a check-in person know where they’re going and when they’ll be done. Adding a location tracking app to your cell phone is a good idea and screening with video chat is a great one. Some like to do a short in-person meet prior to going to the cuddle site. Carrying mace/pepper spray on your keys (where it’s legal) may give some women peace of mind.
I like to arrive with my cuddle clothes already on to avoid the need to undress in someone else’s home (spy cameras) and I don’t accept unopened food/drinks. If you are 420 friendly, ALWAYS be sure that you consume your own supply.
Don’t carry lots of cash, keep your phone charged and in arms reach, and know where the exits are. Avoid getting yourself or your car blocked in. Listen to your gut.
Really, though, if after taking reasonable precautions, you don’t feel confident meeting a stranger, cuddling may not be for you. Some of the men on this thread are not wrong—you cannot treat others like rapists and criminals and expect to create a relaxing and nurturing atmosphere. Be cautious for sure, but know that most folks really are here looking for human connection, same as you.
@Artemis095 and other pros, there are some additional strategies that I employ when hosting, whether at home or a hotel/air bnb, and I’m happy to discuss those privately or one-on-one. Feel free to reach out if you have specific hosting questions or concerns.
@BellaSera amazing customer service I suggest to get personal alarm in case of emergency it's best option for protection at the same time client is comfortable
Taking precautions don't* guarantee safety. However it helps us feel safer and more comfortable giving us a better chance at being safe. So that we have time to scan for red flags and get to know the person. If someone doesn't want to do what would make each of us safer, then they are free to go. Saying something like "Bad things can still happen even years later, so just go meet complete strangers with no such measures like video calling" isn't a solution.
Also I wanna point out that taking those steps however a bit much some of them may seem to us, aren't about treating anyone like a criminal. If they were being treated like a criminal, especially really bad ones, virtually all of us would avoid them like the plague. We don't know when or who among us will run into the bad apples going around, so we must take precautions to feel that who we are meeting is someone we could trust.
For example, airports take those kinds of measures and more, are they treating us like criminals when they take those safety precautions...
Relaxing can happen after the initial phase of vetting is done, whatever that looks like for each of us.
@Lovelight, I hear what you’re saying, and don’t fault folks generally for taking whatever precautions make them feel comfortable.
I will admit that my comment was slanted toward pro cuddlers who must balance their safety protocols with the feelings of their clients.
Some pros make a point to say that a woman’s comfort and safety always takes precedence over a male client’s feelings, but I can tell you that if you pat clients down at the door before letting them in your house, you will have vanishingly few repeat customers.
We all have our individual levels of risk tolerance. Folks in the touch industry must necessarily open themselves up to situations that others would find extremely uncomfortable. If that makes someone endlessly anxious, it might not be the right job for them, and that’s ok.
@BellaSera "but I can tell you that if you pat clients down at the door before letting them in your house, you will have vanishingly few repeat customers."
I must grab a giant magnifier, which I don't have, to maybe find any trace of issue with what you said, so we good.
In short, I agree with that.
I think what everyone is missing is that there is no magic bullet that will make sure that you are safe. Do the things that make you feel comfortable. If someone doesn’t respect your comfort then they probably aren’t a compatible cuddle for you. Safety first!!!
@Lovelight you should become a pro cuddler is going to suit you and be 1 of the best cuddlers in the world.
If you feel like becoming a victim of ID theft, by all means give a complete stranger your driver’s license. While you’re at it give her your SS number and keys to your safety deposit box if that’s what it takes to secure your cuddle session. Love you all but safety and common sense run in both directions 😚
@Lucas_ 1/2 deposit in case clients don't turn up is fine,ID photo is fine but video calling or meet in person clients will think this person 100% nervous won't make me uncomfortable they will look for another pros maybe some clients wouldn't mind if they are lack of pros around but if they are many options they won't waste their time. Pros need training and certificate to qualify to be a pro not just I want make money and they are unconfidint meetings strangers as @BellaSera said most folks really are here looking for human connection. Training will give them ideas of precautions and safety.
@Ahmedali999 ~ You're wrong.
https://www.cuddlecomfort.com/become-a-professional-cuddler
Also... how others go about their own safety practices is none of your business to comment against.
The OP posed, "Female cuddlers and safety: what a newbie should know"
Not, "Hey fellas, what do you think about how females wanna do _____ to feel safe?"
So, @Ahmedali999 maybe you should take a step back with your uninformed judgemental stance on this one.
@quixotic_life really I didn't know that in CC you can become pro with no cuddle therapy certificate or training 😱 is like becoming security officer without license all pro i met they had cuddle therapy certificate.
@relaxtoday221
If you aren’t doing anything wrong you should not worry about your license.
LOL what?
And that’s a wrap. Personal attacks are simply not permitted. Closing thread. [-CharlesthePoet]