Is there anything your parents or guardians said to you growing up that you rebelled against & wish you would have listened to now?
Honestly, I wish I rebelled a bit more as opposed to listen more lol. I was so shut in and spent time with my mom to the point where I had maybe one friend and almost zero memories to keep from after school and friends. I just watched my mom play the sims, and Pogo online and played Diablo 2 with her. I was the honor student Angel… then when I was thrown into the real world, I got slapped in the face with sooo much shock effect. Sex before marriage, swearing, weed. These things and more were just crazy things to me 😰
Actually im glad that I listened to my dad at the right time. I was a good student but in high school i got distracted and lost my focus, grades started to go south. Then one night my dad sat me down and had a long conversation. He presented a pretty bleak picture of the future if i dont do well in high school. He said these couple of years will define what kinda life you gonna have. He said party now and you will have a tough life ahead or have tough couple of years now and you can party for rest of your life. Im glad i listened to him. Got my focus back on school. Got into college, graduated with master’s in engineering and from there on its been an upward journey. I now have my own business and make very comfortable living. I still remember that one night discussion with my dad which changed the course of my life.
Damn @Sheena123 thanks for sharing! what I get is that you were a bit sheltered or molded to walk this straight line & than coke to find out the world didn’t work like that … with me & my siblings I had sooo much freedom / no curfew that it is a shocker to myself that I never took advantage of my freedom & forever been laid back - homebody - & never really had any mischievous ways … my half brother I’m the other hand grew up with my dad & his 2nd wife & he had absolutely no freedom / curfew after curfew/ …. Basically a bird in a cage, but once he turned 16-17 he took to the streets 1000% with zero care … kinda just blew up , so this makes me wonder (or realize) that too much of anything is literally not a good thing. Edit: Everytime I look back I wish I had not rebelled more, because there was nothing to rebel against lol, but definitely have taken more advantage if my freedom & being more daring ect … I was wayyy too naive & just a good kid lol
@RayWah I’m really glad your dad had that talk with you, it seems that he really got through to you & painted the picture very vividly , he knew how to convey the reality of this world to you, I don’t think many parents know how to do this properly & instead end up taking the route of just disciplining, so In essence they are just instilling fear, “to respect them or else” instead instilling.
My mother (as well as my mentor who was essentially my adopted mother) were against me joining the military but I was dead set on it. It ended up being a thoroughly horrible experience that almost ended my life and I still suffer with the trauma from it years later. Probably will the rest of my life. I have often wondered how my life would have gone had I listened to their pleadings not to go.
*That it's better to get a feel for a person's heart than it is to judge him/her by the color of their skin.. *That there is more to the world than your family-of-origin can provide, but you have to go find it.. and *Your Heart is the Treasure..the body is just the vehicle it tools around in! <<This one helped a lot with Self-esteem! I've been grateful for the guidance of my Glammaw!
@RayWah where did you go to school?
I've looked back on this recently. I thought about the phase I rejected advice because I literally knew everything, yea? then I thought about the phase when my perspectives started shifting. I can tangent here, but the realization I came to is I received the advice I did and made the choices I did and I became the person I am and I'm all good with that. No regrets of anything because what I realized, there isn't a template of what a perfect human is. In fact, the perfect human, I think, is just someone that grows everyday. This could be a segue into something deeper, but we're in the forums and my headphones are on.
Invest for retirement. Even if it's only $5 a week. Money compounds.
Don't date people who don't see you as a whole person.
I'm sure there's more. But those are the two that would have probably made a bigger difference over the years if I had followed them.
@KYtranspant
"Don't date people who don't see you as a whole person."
What exactly does this mean? What is a, "whole," person? Specifically, what is a, "whole," person in your perspective?
@Saysoh Personal and educational goals in life, choice of career and whether or not to start a family. Those are the top ones.
Some people date and marry others for what they think they can get from them or who they can become, not who they are.
My first ex-husband and I divorced because I did not want a family and a traditional role in life. He knew that when he met me , it was one of the things I made explicitly clear. He chose to ignore it and that part of who I was thinking I would change my mind.
He did not see me as a whole person with my own dreams and autonomy.
Don’t make room in your life for people whose lives don’t include room for you.
Don’t let someone’s negative energy drain the positive energy out of you.
Don’t eat yellow snow—got this advice too late! 🤢😂
Man, so many gates for discourse just opened up.
I think about social, "traditions," and I think about subjective verus objective and how traditions are defind by social constructs. I'm with you, not out of any kind of rebellion, but I just never wanted to have kids (I'd be lieing if there wasn't something in me to have kids, but that brings up instinct which brings up influence versus, "gut feeling," or even a gate to discussing human consciousness). Relationships have failed because of this and have felt I haven't fallen, "in line," so when you mentioned, "whole human," to me, that's defining this journey of life is a template and when you step the side, you're considered not normal. To put it bluntly, that's kind of fu**ed up, because now the human experience is defined and it robs you of what the journey could actually be because of pressure whixh brings up determanalism versus free will, but I haven't had my coffee yet.