Why couldn’t Luke find love?
He was looking in Alderaan places.
If you are American when you go into the bathroom and American when you come out then while in the bathroom you must be European.
I was just reminiscing about this fantastic herb garden I had when I was growing up.
Good thymes.
Did you hear about the man who got hit by the same bicycle every day?
It was a vicious cycle.
Do trees poop?
Of course they do, how else would we get number 2 pencils?
Are there bugs on the moon?
Yes, they are called lunar ticks.
What did the socks say to the pants?
-sup britches.
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
Supplies!
It wasn't long before the coach had to kick Cinderella off the softball team...
She kept running away from the ball.....
....
Good ones! Lol
Books are weird. You stare at dead trees while hallucinating.
https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTRsnjg9v/
What do you call a horror movie about bears?
Bearly Alive
🤣🤣🤣. Awesome!
Ok so every day when I get home from work I kiss my front door, then I cuddle one of the walls, and I comfort a few of the windows.
It’s a detached house .
You know... I'm so good at sleeping, I can do it with my eyes closed! 😆
If you catch a fish and throw it back, does it go tell its friends that it has been abducted by aliens?
Confucius say, "Baseball very wrong, man with four balls cannot walk!".
I was wondering why music was coming from the printer, then I realized the paper was jamming
What does it take to make an octopus laugh? Ten-tickles 🐙
When does a joke become a dad joke?
When it is apparent
What do you call a person who tells dad jokes, but isn't a dad?
A faux pa
Never date a tennis player. Love means nothing to them.
What do you call birds that stick together ?
Vel-crows
What do sea monsters eat ?
Fish and ships
There's a good reason the Chinese are ticked about that balloon take down. They had to take out a loan to build it. Now they're stuck with a balloon payment.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Because it was too far to walk around.
Did you hear about the guy whose entire left side was crushed?
He’s all right now.
How do dogs and trees communicate?
They bark!
I saw a baseball grow in size right in front of me... Then it hit me!
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