Is it rude or against rules to ask for a picture of someone’s state issued ID before a session? With addresses and super personal info redacted of course. But I’m curious? Cause I may have lost a client, but he also could’ve been a predator so 🤔
I think this is somewhat of an invasion of privacy. And I'm wondering why it's needed. This could be used maliciously against someone who is looking for cuddles anonymously.
I offer it upfront and am open to sending more photos or doing a video call. I think a pro should feel safe around someone.
A pro needs to know who she/he is with in the event anything happens. A client who does not want to identify themselves is under no obligation to use that pro.
It's not against the rules and anyone who doesn't respect your need for safety over their anonymity isn't a loss.
I have no issue with anyone I meet with asking. Not sure how it can be used against you if all information is redacted except for your name and picture? It’s for the cuddlers safety. If you don’t want to share then don’t meet with the cuddler.
I will give my real name and a copy of my ID with address and driver’s license number redacted. I want the cuddler to feel at ease as much as possible.
Technically, Pros and non-Pros can ask or require a picture of a photo ID of someone they plan to meet with their photo and first name visible (having black bars to redact their last name, birthday, address, and DD#). This can be a step to help put to better ease of the otherwise "stranger from the internet" they would be meeting.
I think I would probably ask for an ID if I have doubts about the person age (making sure they are not minor). Other then that, I don't.
No way, I freely offer it up if I think they are hesitant because I want them to feel as safe as possible.
Edit: Though I’ve never had to give it out. Edit 2: @RainsCuddle oh yeah checking for age, excellent point
I don't think it's against the rules or rude, but I'm entertained that the poll doesn't let you choose that it's rude. It's like Jared's surveys while pivoting in Silicon Valley:
Oh, for anyone redacting their info by drawing black bars over the personal info, make sure those black bars are actually baked into the image. Don’t make the mistake of thinking the info has been obscured when the text is still selectable behind the bar. I don’t know if that is an issue with a photo, but if it was a pdf with editable text or something, you might have that issue.
@tallteddy if they are looking for cuddles anonymously, and they try to push boundaries and, heaven forbid, are successful, at least the pro has something to provide the police.
@Cuddle_Bunny2 you have not lost a client. You have the risk of a very bad experience.
Is it rude or against rules to ask for someone’s ID? With super personal info redacted of course. I ask because I may have lost a client, but he also very well could’ve been a predator. Should is this a situation I should report?
We chatted for a couple days, moved off site to get to know each other. Seemed to be legit but mmm I’m having second thoughts. Any help?
Trust your instincts. The loss of a prospective client vs your safety and/or your life.
Agreed! Sometimes its the best thing to do when the person may seem a little sketchy.
If you are hosting, that person knows your address. And it would be a snap to get your full name if they have your address. If they are hosting, you have their address, so there would be no point in not showing ID.
@Cuddle_Bunny2 It's not rude. Many clients may find it off-putting and reluctant to book with you. Also, it may not be effective because ID's can easily be manipulated by someone who is half-decent with a computer (especially digital ID's). But, it is your prerogative.
@WriterGF
If you are hosting, that person knows your address.
This is not necessarily true. Some people don't host at home.
I don't think it's against the rules, but it's extremely rare that people ask for this, and I would generally refuse to provide it (possibly with occasional exceptions).
I understand why you would want to ask for ID, but... You're a stranger on the Internet. You don't even have any karma. I have zero reason to trust you with my identifying information.
Do whatever you need to do to feel comfortable and safe. The people who understand that will happily oblige.
@cuddle_bunny2, I don't care if it is rude. My practice of asking for a picture of ID with only the license number redacted is based on safety advice from a former sex worker. I also never take the conversation off the site until after the first meeting. NEVER ignore your instincts. If they're telling you something is off, LISTEN. I've never regretted following my instincts and they've always kept me safe. When I ignored them, I regretted it.
@tallteddy, it's needed to keep women safe. I will not go anywhere in private with a man I met on the internet without sending a picture of his ID and everything I know about him to a friend. Letting him know that I've done this drastically reduces my chances of ending up dead in a ditch. Or worse. And if I do disappear, I want the police to have the info they need to find him.
I find a chopped-up sticky note does wonders for keeping sensitive information out of one's ID pic. Mine's uploaded to my account (under "Private") and only shows my face, first name, state and city, birth date, height, eye color, and assigned sex. I'm actually thinking about editing out that last one, as it's no cuddler's business and not entirely physically accurate anyway—but that's a different story.
As an assurance that yes, I am the person pictured in my profile, it goes a long way... despite the infamously bad ID photo.
Most of that information is in my public profile already anyway—this just shows it's unlikely I'm lying about it. Why should I be worried about sharing something like that with someone I'm about to meet in person?
It’s not rude. It’s not against the rules.
Anyone who can’t understand or accept your need to verify the person’s identity for your safety and would choose not to see you because of that is not your ideal client.
@Cuddle_Bunny2 - I voted no. Not rude, not against the rules. You do what makes you feel comfortable. Everyone has their own vetting process. 💕
Hey, just me wondering about privacy again. The European Union has laws about what you can and can't do with personal information from clients. It's called the General Data Protection Regulation (GDPR). Are all EU professionals aware of this and how does Cuddle Comfort make sure they keep to this?
@tallteddy - Since pro cuddlers are self-employed and do not work for CC, it’s the pros’ responsibility to make sure they are compliant, not the site’s. However, if it pertains to the site itself that would mean the site would need to conform in regards to site members’ data.
Asking to see an ID at the beginning of a session? OK.
Asking for images/electronic copies of said ID? Yeah, I'd pass on that for obvious reasons.
@Babichev The easiest way to send the picture is through the messaging system on the site. That means you upload the copy of your ID to the site's server and therefor it is cuddle comfort's responsibility too.
@tallteddy