Are my posts even being shown? Or message being sent?

mnmarty

I haven't heard back from a single message I sent out, is this normal?

BashfulLoner

Yes

zerocantaloupe

If you want to verify if it’s the site or the people, send me a message.

pmvines

You can look at the sent messages option and it will show what's been sent . Lots of folks dont get responses and not everyone is on here at all times, not an instant messaging type thing . Sorry that is happening, and good luck to you. There are threads in the forum about how to potentially get better responses may want to try checking them out .

CuddleWho

Most men will find that the vast majority — possibly 100% — of messages they send to non-pro women go unanswered, as do half or more of the messages they send to pro women.

CuddleDuncan

@CuddleWho's figures are, sadly, correct in the case of men messaging women.

This thread may help you improve your odds:

• How I found happiness on Cuddle Comfort

AGnihon

Well how many people did you reach out to? I think it would be unusual to get no responses if you had reached out to 10 people for example. I have had a few people not respond, but if I were to estimate, about 8.5/10 people I message get back to me eventually even if it's not in a timely manner. Reading people's comments on here, It seems like the kind of response rate I get is not the norm, but even then if you have sent a considerable number of messages, I would think at least someone should have gotten back to you. Sorry to hear of your difficulties.

OhioMike

@AGnihon shhhhhhh ! You’re ruining the forum narrative 😂

The response rate I get is not the “norm “ either. The only idea I have come up with over the years is that profiles that don’t get responses are more vocal on forums than people who get responses

To the OP. I’m not trying to be dismissive to your plight. We don’t know the context of your messages nor should we. We don’t know who you’re reaching out to etc . So many variables to consider. Only repeated advice I offer is look for those who are successful on CC ( there are many btw) and possibly emulate those profiles 😊

Good luck and welcome to the CC site !

4bearhugs

@mnmarty Your profile looks good, but you have been here less than 2 weeks. It could take a while (2 months for me) before you start to get responses. Keep reaching out to different people, and contribute in positive ways to the threads. Have patience and dont expect anything at all. Maybe book with some pros to get a couple good karma built up. That usually helps the comfort level of those you are reaching out to. Remember you are probably competing with 50 guys to get someone's attention.

netrunner

@mnmarty
There are a lot of factors in how quickly you may get a response from someone:

• The person you messaged, were they online within the hour, the last day or even week? Really anything over a month and I wouldn't ever expect a response. Some accounts people haven't logged in for years and people decide to report them for not being responsive or for being inactive
• Whomever you messaged, did you send 1 message or 2+ over the span of a few hours/days? Depending on the person you're messaging, they could have 5-25 new messages daily from people to read through and response. Most tend to respond to the oldest messages first though so with every new message you send you're ultimately sending yourself to the back of the line for getting a response
• While it appears you joined the site very recently, what's been your expectation for a response? Some site members check their messages multiple times a day while others do so once every 1-2 days depending on when they have the time and think to check. By default the site does send an email notification to them when getting a private message, but with how much junk email people get it can get easily buried if they check that at all
• The site doesn't have an app (though majority of people call the website an app) so there aren't push notifications to your phone unless you have them for your emails and see something come through from the site
• Having photos of yourself uploaded, which you do have, does help drastically over not having anything uploaded. Also having your profile bio completed helps too, which you've also already done

Additionally, those listed as Pros will usually have a lot of messages to respond to daily and non-Pros (women specifically) can easily have as many or more daily messages. The reason for this is most women who join the site decide to charge and therefore those who don't get even more attention.

CuddleDuncan did leave a good link with some info, but thought I'd share some additional things.

TheFunCartel

External locus of control: it’s the site

Internal locus of control: it’s you

Reality: you just never know

mnmarty

Thanks that was alot of effort you put onto your responses. I greatly appreciate it. I will read it all. Thank you. Marty the impatient

CuddleDuncan

@OhioMike

profiles that don’t get responses are more vocal on forums than people who get responses

I'm sure that's true. Forums and the like are intrinsically places where people are more likely to go to complain than to say "I had a great time and everything's fine".

@mnmarty 🤣🤣 that kind of attitude goes a long way here, both on the forums and in making a success of the site in general.

Cudbuddle

Not sure if this is helpful but I respond to each private message that I see. Hopefully there are no glitches where we are losing messages.

cogsandgears

Are you messaging women in your age range?

Minestrone101

What are you writing in your messages? That can affect your response rate as well as who you're writing to (active members, forum regulars, if they have karma, etc.). I'd say, the more substantial your message is, the better chance you have of a response.

Babichev

I don’t respond to what I consider non-messages. I’ve got it clearly stated on my profile that if you want a response, have something interesting to say. In spite of that I get messages from men not. in my geographic area who send messages that say nothing more than “hello.”