Thanks agaim for all the meaningful feedback
I highly suggest pros who are certified in their field, they tend to be empathetic people who are accepting and understanding. And they have training around what a platonic touch session is supposed to provide for you, you should walk away relaxed, calm, and centered. I hope you find what you're looking for here or on a dating site, maybe
I was empathetically understanding for you and what you’re going through but I’m a bit thrown off with the “wise ppl don’t spend 7x their budget”. Besides the possible dig at pros, are you saying ppl that may put a good amount of money into pros and having sessions with pros is unwise? I may be reading this totally wrong. I know I go for massages that cost sometimes around $80-$100 and I of course wish it were cheaper so I could go for more massages but I still fully enjoy the experience.
I’m sorry you aren’t getting the experiences you’re looking for. 😕 I can imagine how frustrating it is to search and search for connections and companionship to come up dry. Maybe go to trivia nights or karaoke at bars? Drum up some conversations? Just some ideas 🤷🏻♀️
Sounds like you may feel a bit too entitled to be authentic on your own end. Work on yourself a bit. You aren't owed a particular experience, even if you have to pay for it. If it's simply the concept of exchanging time for money, consider that you pay electricians and so forth based on not only their expertise, but their time as well. Bring your best self and if things don't go exactly as you hope, work on your communication skills or try again.
I can sympathize with the feelings you are experiencing.
When I was cuddling with enthusiasts, I would message pretty all of them in my area since there isn't nearly as much as pros. In recent time I've met silence my assumption is due them being younger and their options are greater.
What has helped me find genuine human connections is meeting people with a common reason. I was enjoying dance classes and it exposed me to many different people. It was interesting to find out women I would dance with were engaged or married. It showed me not every interaction needs to lead a desire or end goal I'm looking for selfishly.
I'm curious where this thread goes.
Thank you all for the Great feedback!
In fairness Kissimee isn't exactly the hopping cuddle spot. I used to live around there.
Sounds like you may have broken a mirror or had a black cat walk in front of you.
As long as there is a huge gender gap and guys willing to pay hundred dollars an hour you are going to find it less likely to find a cuddle enthusiast if you are a guy and only cuddle with women. Someone suggested a dating site and just tell the girl you only want platonic cuddling. I bet you'll find someone faster that way.
@Melancholy On a dating site I’d actually see that as a major red flag. To us on CC it sounds fine but if someone on a dating site said that to me before Cc I’d call BS sooooo fast then block the guy. That just strikes wrong.
Do we get to see the original OP post so we know what to comment on , or has it been changed to shut down discourse?
@stormydaycuddle really ? It was a woman who suggested it to me. She said most guys just want to hook up. So platonic cuddling would be better than that.
@Melancholy I think many women on dating sites would actually like to find a cuddle buddy, but I have to say that before I knew about platonic cuddling, I never would have believed a guy who said that's all he wanted. Unfortunately I would have seen it as a red flag. I know some apps are more versatile and can be seeking friends, not just dating... maybe that would be a better option?
Well this is the last year of no luck unless you broke another mirror
I tried mentioning cuddling in my dating profile, on Tinder and/or Bumble can't remember. The reaction was somewhere between negative and actively hostile. It wasn't cuddling itself that was the problem, it was mentioning in that context.
Maybe I did it wrong, but I abandoned the experiment quite quickly.
OP, your age lists as 20, if that is correct, 7 years 🤷♀️
Hmm.
@stormydaycuddle sounds a little jaded, i wouldn’t think that’s a lie and definitely wouldn’t go as far as to block the person
Yea I think it's pretty overkill to block someone cause of a perceived red flag when there's nothing actually wrong about wanting to cuddle platonically. I don't understand that at all. So what ? Because someone says they aren't looking for sex that's a red flag ?
@Melancholy - The manual on "How to understand women" is nearly a mile thick.
@Melancholy having been on way too many dating sites, it'd be a red flag for me as well. I'd see it as a "bait and switch" Sure, you "say" you want platonic cuddling just to lure me in and get my guard down. I've found most people lie on their profiles in one way or another. Lots say they're looking for long-term when they really want a hook-up, just so that they can get someone to go out with them long enough to get what they want and then ghost. And that's assuming there's even someone on the other end that's genuinely interested in meeting in person and not just trying to scam you out of your money. I guess it just depends on the experiences you've had. Depending on the rest of the profile it very well might be a delete/block situation for me too.
@mimtheplantmom I'd say I'd have blocked them previously. With how many heads still snap back when I say I'm a pro cuddler and that men aren't all after the same thing, at least some see it that way. Dating apps don't seem the proper place to be pressing that and it can be easily misconstrued. just to each their own perception. @KaaGee @Lisa123 Yup yup.
OH AND!!! I did have a guy say he wanted to read books with me once... major book nerd here and I love reading in the same room as people. Guess what... not what he wanted. Almost forgot about that gem. So yeah, tiny bit jaded but with proper reason. I don't believe many people here would pull it but I've seen it so... perception, deception.... depends on the person. Side note: why the book reading thing wound up getting past me is because I usually go with people who wear pocket protectors or goth or both haha. It seemed TOTALLY reasonable that someone would just want to read. Lies! One of my more naive moments.
I also get that, for some women, listing an interest in platonic cuddling would be about as attractive as listing an interest in being a couch potato. It's not exactly a traditional value signal.
Sounds like every guy on dating sites only wants sex and will tell any lie they can to get it. It sounds like it's best to stay off of dating sites altogether unless you're looking for the same thing they are.
Someone said you could try a dating site so I figured I'd throw in my input. I actually did this years ago. Before this site existed. I was recently singled and just wanted comfort but not attachment.
It worked, I met 4 different people, 1 I became a good friend with to this day. All were only platonic. They probly woulda been interested in more, but let's face it your a guy, if you don't want anything to happen. It physically can't ha.
I met one other girl where it went quite the other way but that's another story.
Try it, what do you have to lose?
@Mike403 there was one guy who actually read my profile and saw that I was agnostic and invited me to lunch so he could try to convert me to his Jehovah's Witness ways...
@KaaGee - I grew up in a Christian household and converted to atheism later in life.
Actually I would react with interest and curiosity with some skepticism and appreciation thrown in. I’ve met so many different types of men looking for every kind of relationship and nothing shocks me. I don’t judge anything until I know what it’s about. Then I can decide once I talk for a bit. The more experience, both good and bad, you learn to deal with all types and you open your mind to all types of possibilities. I’m always in complete control or I don’t go. I learned caution early on, then it’s just automatically in place always!
try to meet people outside, bars, shopping centers, etc. dating sites are frauds and waste of time
@Nobodieshero thanks for your comment. I was beginning to think my idea was totally nuts after all the negative comments about it. There's bound to be women who are very quick to block due to perceived red flags, but I think occasionally someone will take a chance and she'll discover I really meant what I said on my profile. I really don't want to meet up with someone who already disbelieves everything on my profile anyway
Melancholy,
Ignore the negativity. I think of it like throwing a fishing line in the water. Litterally you lose nothing by trying.
When I did it I messaged the girls and explained. The ones I met it worked. Youl have to do a little getting to know each other but thats the same as on here.
Dating sites are frustrating but they do work, you just have to be human and know going in that most people won't reply. Girls get hammered with messages so you have to stand out somehow. Be earnest and be genuine.
Who knows maybe youl score a gf lol, infinite mutual cuddles.