Professional Cuddler & Life Coach

CuddleMyMind

So I have my masters in mental health. Have a more than fulltime profession and have been contemplating starting up an LLC for Life Coaching.

What do you all think? Will it relate to cuddling? Will it help make my sessions more desirable in the cuddle community? Is it worth it?!?!?

Are there any life coaches here on the site reading the forum?

AllAboutSoul

IMHO, that sounds like a "relationship boundaries issue" lawsuit waiting to happen.

CuddleDuncan

Don't do it.

To be fair, this is the advice I always give when somebody asks me whether they should do something. The reason is that the Thing in question is always a bad idea, or at least a sub-optimal idea, for them at that time. If it was a good idea they'd be doing it anyway, or asking me how to do it best, or asking for support to do it. So don't do it.

To be clear, I'm not being negative. I'm very supportive of your ideas of improving both yourself and your cuddling sessions, but this isn't the way forward. If you want to de-emphasise or stop cuddling and work as a life coach, well then hooray, go do it, but that's a different thing.

To answer your specific questions:

Will it relate to cuddling?
I wouldn't recommend life coaching to any professional cuddler. For some professionals it might not do any harm, and in a few cases might even do some good, but if you want to be a better cuddler there are better ways of achieving it. And you are marching straight into some serious boundary questions as @AllAboutSoul has already mentioned.

Will it help make my sessions more desirable in the cuddle community?
No. Absolutely, categorically not. Additional qualifications do not bring in more clients. And it will definitely make you a less desirable professional in the eyes of many clients. (They will perceive it as you wanting to tell them what to do.) Personally, as a prospective client I would definitely see it as a mild negative. (I see the mental health training as a positive.)

Is it worth it?!?!?
No.

Your profile mentions massage. I don't know the various laws around this in the US but I do know that it is a regulated profession. I am assuming that you have looked into it and checked that it legal for you to charge for massage in the states where you operate, and also checked with your massage regulator that it's ok for you to combine massage and cuddling in a combined session.

You already have a background in mental health which can be very helpful indeed to a professional cuddler. And you have training and experience in massage and cuddling. I understand completely that you have a desire to do more training, and in itself that is great. But you are already in a very strong position to "help others feel comfortable, heard and accepted" and given all your lovely Karma I venture to suggest that you do do that. I'm left wondering why you want to broaden your training - which is already very broad - by expanding into yet another area, rather than deepening it.

And finally, if your objective is to be a more complete cuddler, why not do a cuddling training course? I know you will know some of it already but you'll still learn a little, and possibly a lot.

cde123

Go for it, I say. I needed that, got it here, and it was great. Not sure why giving life coach style suggestions crosses boundaries in any way. I like receiving good and insightful advice.

CuddleDuncan

@cde123

Not sure why giving life coach style suggestions crosses boundaries in any way.

The short answer is because the client has hired a cuddler, not a life coach. If they wanted a life coach they would have hired one. (If you go to the chiropodist you don't expect them to start doing dentistry on you.)

There is no shortage of cuddling clients who are vulnerable in one way or another, or several ways. It's never ok to bring up life coaching matters (or any other separate service) during a session because that puts an unfair and unjustified pressure on the client: a pressure that they have paid explicitly to avoid. (You wouldn't be happy if your dentist stopped doing dentistry and started high pressure sales techniques to sell you a timeshare.) Doing so is abusive and - if it comes out of the session time - fraudulent.

There are only two ways in which it's acceptable to bring up alternative services. One, by explaining it in the profile, and - if appropriate, mentioning it briefly, once, during the conversation about whether the client and professional are a good match and if so, arranging the session.

Two, if the client explicitly mentions it during the session. For example, if the client talks about a problem they are having and asks for advice. This could happen in any session, and depending on the client and the problem the professional having had training in life coaching might be helpful. This is the reason that some cuddle professionals do take life coaching courses.

The problem is not when a kind and thoughtful cuddler discusses life coaching matters with a capable client who wants to do that. The problem is when either the professional is insensitive or the client is vulnerable.

If a professional says during a session, "Would you like some help with that problem?" the client replying "Yes" is not proof that the client would like help.

If you want more background start by reading up on the concept of 'undue influence'.

jplemmon

Sorry that you're getting stupid advice. I thought what you're offering sounds great. You should go for it. It could be a good way to differentiate yourself. Obviously be upfront about it but I don't get the impression that you weren't planning to do that so not sure why you were being attacked for it. Anyways, you do you!

Mike403

@CuddleDuncan - I don't see anything wrong with it as long as she asks first and if the client doesn't consent to not bring it up again.

AllAboutSoul

If she has a master's degree in mental health, she has laws (and licensing) to worry about, especially in regard to a vulnerable person (i.e. an elderly person, someone being treated for mental illness, etc.) Or in a more simplistic example, doctors cannot date their patients.

Her question should be asked to her state board, insurance company and legal representative.

pmvines

I am not a fan of anybudy using cuddling and mental health professional interchangeably. That is dangerous. Cuddling can be therapeutic but it isn't therapy. Many things are therapeutic and play a role in our overall well being but it is all part of a small piece to a larger puzzle that falls under the umbrella of our mental health. All of that being said, a life coach is not really a therapist either. So combining elements of that with cuddling I can see no harm in . I will say that you cannot charge for this as an add on to a cuddle session, I believe that's been covered in other threads. And I would advise that if you want to retain credibility and be ethical that you don't try to market it as a form of therapy.

cde123

@CuddleDuncan

It's never ok to bring up life coaching matters (or any other separate service) during a session because that puts an unfair and unjustified pressure on the client: a pressure that they have paid explicitly to avoid

Interestingly, not at all how I use professional cuddling. It's not an ego boost for me, and I don't want false validation - I'm certainly not paying to avoid anything, and if she wants to express some opinion, I'm all ears. What I am doing is embracing simple touch and connection within a paid session, hoping to leave with warm memories of her pleasant care, and some shreds of new understanding about how someone different than myself approaches life and the world.

TouchSanctuary

I know a local pro cuddler who works as a life coach, massage therapist and reiki healer as well. If it resonates with you, I say go for it! That said, there's a lot of life coaches out there, so it's a very competitive field - I'd recommend learning more about marketing as it's challenging to get clients.