Why is this becoming more of thing...

charkh1992charkh1992
in General

Hello!!

So, are Pro's starting to see an increase of "interested to cuddle/availability" messages?

Example.
"Hey, are you available tonight. Going to be at (wherever) do you have any plans"
Pro response
"Yes.....(then whatever else)"
"OK, great. I'll confirm shortly"

Then CRICKETS....

WHY is this becoming more and more of an increase of time wasting... I surely cannot be the only one... 🤔

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Comments

  • JoyfulHeartJoyfulHeart
    edited March 30

    @charkh1992 You aren't alone. I think it's just evidence of the fact that a certain percentage of the population are self-absorbed.

    Some people spread a very wide net, then abandon other conversations when the net gives them the things they're looking for.

    Moderators do take note when people take that to the extreme: talking to many pros but never booking any of them.

  • hey_nikkyhey_nikky

    I've definitely had more of these types of people in my inbox lately, than I did when I first started. Or ones that do have sessions with me then say, "let me know when you're back in the area, I'd love to do another session with you" so I message and say "hey I'll be back these dates" then they view my profile and never respond.

    With the ones that express interest then disappear, ill wait a while and then send a "hey were still interested?" Then leave it at that.

  • CuddleDuncanCuddleDuncan

    Please Report such exchanges. In many cases the client is looking for non-platonic services, and will message a number of professionals to improve their chances. Ceasing to respond isn't an offence in itself, but when doing it after asking to meet 'today' suggests that it's a profile the moderators should keep an eye on.

    Reports allow the mods to spot patterns of behaviour, and take action if necessary.

  • BJCBJC

    Reporting people for not responding? You've got to be kidding! Sounds like a police state.

  • pmvinespmvines

    People are allowed to be flaky , no matter how annoying it may be. Interwebs is full of that , it's not new and it's not just you .

  • TxTomTxTom

    @BJC I agree. These forums are full of complaints about either Pros or clients not responding, ghosting, etc.

    That's a reportable offense? Are there enough Mods for all of that?

  • CharlieBearCharlieBear

    @TxTom

    That's a reportable offense? Are there enough Mods for all of that?

    Haha no there aren’t enough for that, but that doesn’t stop people from reporting it. I don’t know what action they expect us to take. Especially when many of the reports are by guys that open their message calling the pro beautiful/sexy 🙄

    At least they are showing us why they are here…

  • charkh1992charkh1992
    edited March 31

    I would never report anyone for it, I made this thread to ask a question about what I've personally been experiencing over the past month or so and I didn't know if was happening to others...
    I don't report it because, I give benefit of the doubt.

    It is time wasting, I've been in communication with a couple of people, and I've placed plans on hold, and then missed opportunity to go out with friends etc. As I think "oh, I have a session tonight" then it never happens. That's a bit disrespectful in my eyes.

  • natickbennatickben

    I cannot believe we are actually at a time when someone can say moderating a website to its own rules is akin to a "police state" and others agree, but I guess we are. 🙄

  • charkh1992charkh1992

    @natickben

    I just read your profile, your last portion of it? This site is a professional service for the platonic experience of cuddling, it is transactional.

  • SoosonSooson
    edited March 31

    "I cannot believe we are actually at a time when someone can say moderating a website to its own rules is akin to a "police state" and others agree, but I guess we are"
    What rule exactly?

    @CuddleDuncan Is it ok to report a pro that hits my DM with a "hey" or "hey love" instead of properly introducing herself? Considering how little effort is put into these messages you would assume she "messages a number of professionals clients to improve her chances"? To me that could be a sign of non-platinic intentions.

  • starrynitecudsstarrynitecuds

    @charkh1992 I'm confused, you think you have a session? Isn't there a scheduling thing here for confirming appointments for a client and pro? If a proposal isn't approved, there's no appointment.

  • lonelytauroslonelytauros

    Maybe sometimes it’s difficult to distinguish the difference between a reportable offense to an inconvenience

  • SoosonSooson

    I used to buy and sell vinyl records as a side hobby. cannot tell you how many times people said, "give me your number I'll call you" and never did. at some point you just stop expecting anything until its actually happening. Until they book, assume they will not and don't build your hopes up.

  • sunnysideupsunnysideup
    edited March 31

    @charkh1992 so I guess what @natickben means to say is that he’s currently only looking for enthusiasts at the moment ? Since a lot of guys might get messages from pros or soon to be pros putting that message there is a like a time saver for them

    Also yes it sucks when someone says they are interested and then later they go radio silent, it’s probably happened to all of us whether enthusiast, pro, or client. Just part of messaging online I wish it were better but this is how it is.

    My advice for the situation you brought up is to not put anything on hold unless they confirm the appointment. If they say they are confirming soon and don’t, I’d reach out to them shortly asking for that confirmation and if you don’t hear back, just go about your day as if the cuddle isnt happening, then send them a message saying something like “since you weren’t able to confirm your appointment today I’ve made other appointments/plans but let me know if you’d like to schedule for another day” or something like that. Or if you can make that sound more diplomatic as possible

  • Erin_Elle_Erin_Elle_

    Yes, @charkh1992! It is frustrating when you put your life on hold for what you think is a scheduled session, only to get stuck waiting, causing you to miss other plans.

    But hey, maybe this situation, which you find unpleasant and increasingly common, is the universe nudging you to update your systems and boundaries. (You’ve reached a new level in the game. 🎉) External circumstances won’t change, but you can change how you approach these situations.

    For instance, my system of scheduling a mandatory screening Zoom call before meeting a client, has completely eliminated this issue for me. (99% of the time.) This is just one example, and there are certainly other solutions.

  • charkh1992charkh1992
    edited March 31

    @starrynitecuds

    If someone is communicating well, expressing interest, being told where they're going to be, and agreeing. Then not booking. That's time wasting. That's what I am getting at here...

    To all others:

    And, no pro, should be soliciting first anyway.

  • SoosonSooson

    And, no pro, should be soliciting first anyway

    They are allowed to if their page was viewed. and i don't think there's anything wrong with that. I actually met a few that way.

  • JubalJubal
    edited March 31

    Simple objective reason - the client messages multiple pros on short notice trying to find someone available for that timeframe, because if the client only messages one and waits for an answer, the pro might not even respond. So some pros don't reply at all, and some do. Of those that do, perhaps one of them replied before you did and the client booked with her before you replied to his last message to you

    Now yes, it would be courteous for the client to send you a reply saying "hey, I already booked someone", but as many MANY threads and posts have noted on this forum, there is apparently no obligation to send someone a reply, acknowledge messages that one does not wish to, etc.

    Just treat such messages as inquiries only until you actually get a booking request.

  • natickbennatickben

    @charkh1992 this site is nowhere near solely for professionals. My bio specifically says I do not cuddle with professionals because of the transactional nature which is a detriment for me. For others, it might not be and my profile specifically says this-that there is no judgment for pros, it's just not what I am seeking here. Not sure what my profile and/or preferences have to do with the topic at hand though?

  • SoosonSooson

    If someone is communicating well, expressing interest, being told where they're going to be, and agreeing. Then not booking. That's time wasting. That's what I am getting at here...

    @charkh1992 I would suggest assuming there is no session until they booked no matter what they said or how serious they come across and be less emotionally invested in these communications and not counting on that $$$. and don't hold a time slot two weeks in advance for someone who "intends to book" just to be ghosted the day of.

  • pmvinespmvines
    edited March 31

    It might be the resurrection of zombie Jesus and deviled egg farts talking , but I don't see anything terrible about any of this . It's an inconvenience, it's rude , and it's not the way to be a cool human , however it is the world we are living in and not everything that bothers us warrants a flogging of the offending party , or a support group. Not trying to sound insensitive honestly , I'm not . I just am up to my eyeballs in posts and threads about things that bother somebody or they are offended by something so then an entire 6 weeks worth of tit for tat and dissection of it all ensues and it's just silly and tiresome. All that I want t to do is post about my poops while my cat and dog act as foot warmers why is this too much to ask ???

  • TxTomTxTom
    edited March 31

    ...not everything that bothers us warrants a flogging of the offending party...

    That.

  • RedFox16RedFox16
    edited March 31

    I mean, a good flogging party used to bring the whole neighborhood together in the good ole days!! Maybe we actually should go back to that instead of reporting 😜💫

    But if that's not an option, I think just something similar to what @Erin_Elle_ said could help with time wasters. Maybe figure out some method to confirm that a client is serious like a short video chat. But I also don't assume I have a booking until we both agree to the booking on the site cuz there definitely are a lot of messages exchanged talking about days and times that might work for us both but not set in stone.

    Good luck in the future!! Hope you can find something that helps 🍀😊

  • BJCBJC

    I agree with Mr. Vines. There is no point in complaining that people do not respond in the way that you think they should. You cannot control the way others respond. All you can do is act in a way that preserves your own integrity and values. Let others do what they want.

  • starrynitecudsstarrynitecuds

    @charkh1992

    If someone is communicating well, expressing interest, being told where they're going to be, and agreeing. Then not booking. That's time wasting. That's what I am getting at here...

    It's on you to set and adhere to your boundaries. You're blaming him for time-wasting, but you continued to engage, despite no appointment being set.
    Do you have any friends successful in sales who may be willing to mentor or advise you? Some of us just aren't naturally cut out for sales and need coaching to be comfortable with doing it. It's something I still utilize in my career.

  • Nature_Lover_Nature_Lover_

    This has happened though not too often. Loving all the shared insights and perspectives on this thread.

  • MorpheusMorpheus

    @charkh1992 I’ve been in situations where I’ve needed to find a pro fairly quickly. I contact the one I’m interested in the most and when I don’t hear back within a couple hours, I’ll contact another, then I don’t hear from her and contact another, next thing you know I have 3 pros messaging me who are available. I won’t ghost, I’ll politely say I’ve made other plans. I think some guys though may be in a similar situation and go with someone else and just don’t say anything. Most pros are polite but there’s some that don’t want to talk to you unless you’re scheduling an appointment.

  • TxTomTxTom
    edited March 31

    @Morpheus

    I’ve been in situations where I’ve needed to find a pro fairly quickly.

    I know exactly what you're talking about.

    What you need is... a SuperPro!

    https://www.cuddlecomfort.com/forum/discussion/16814/superpros/p1

  • SoosonSooson
    edited March 31

    .... Which makes me wonder: if seeking a pro for "right now" brings your intentions to question, shouldn't the intentions of the pro that agrees to meet right now be questioned as well? Why does this overthinking and in-depth analysis of one's intentions seem to be a bit selective and one-sided?

    and if it is such a concern, why does the platform allow same day booking for two that haven't met previously?

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