Odd interaction... report?

AlyLauren

I just had a very strange exchange that hasn't happened to me before and I declined the booking and don't intend to meet this person but I'm curious what everyone thinks about it. I'm unsure if I should report or just leave it alone.

I had someone reach out from another state with a booking request. No message or introduction. So I responded saying we needed to have some discussion before booking. He's new to the site, no karma, no photos.

He said he is visiting Colorado and wants an overnight session. I haven't done those but I am open to it. He asked what I would charge. I let him know the safety steps we would need to take to continue (photo, video meeting beforehand, deposit, etc), and I let him know that I offer a 10% discount for anything beyond 8 hours. So $720+ depending on how long he would actually like me there.

He responded by saying he was offering $300 cash, plus wine, food and the hotel and asking if we had a deal.

Of course, I declined and also let him know I don't drink in session. But should I report this? He didn't directly say anything inappropriate (aside from the wine) but it feels like he's looking for something other than cuddling. Thoughts?

Carrie_Anne

I don’t know if this is technically a reportable offense, or did he actually break any TOS by asking for something sexual?
AND he’s absolutely not paying attention to what your charge is so that would be a big NO anyway! Trying to play let’s make a deal lol
Also, I’m glad you don’t drink while cuddling. That would be a big mistake imo.
My policy was always, no overnights for first time cuddlers and a lot of screening.

But you absolutely did the right thing by declining, I see several 🚩 with him and what he’s asking of you. My gut is he’s looking for something that you don’t want and that is illegal for the site. I say that based on my experience.
If he is trying to set all this up (and hasn’t sent a photograph), I personally think he is looking for a sex worker but I could be wrong.
If you have a bad feeling about something, there’s a reason!

AlyLauren

He didn't overtly break TOS (although I feel like alcohol is in the TOS but I could be misremembering).

Honestly, I haven't had many requests for overnights. But maybe I should spend some time figuring out my boundaries there. I think you make a great point about first time cuddlers.

pmvines

He didn't respect your rate and tried to undercut you by more than half and brought alcohol into the scenario plus just asking for an overnight right off the bat. That is all red flag. I don't know that the mods would consider it to be an actionable offense. But it doesn't hurt to report. If anything, it means that it gives mods access to looking into the person's message history etc to see if there is something that he does that is an actionable offense.

Carrie_Anne

Also the Pro Forum is a great place to get help and advice on these type of situations.
I agree with @pmvines that he already is showing that he doesn’t follow the rules so that’s a pretty good sign that there’s more of that to come.
Go ahead and report just to put him on the Mod’s radar because I would almost bet the farm that whoever he gets to cuddle with him, he’s going to break the rules.
And did he ever send you a photo? Probably not. The ones who never share photos often don’t because they don’t want to get caught.

Carrie_Anne

Unfortunately he will probably find someone who will do what he wants.

Sheena123

Definitely not someone who would respect you. I would not do an overnight with someone new. You don’t know him. You don’t know what he’s like to cuddle with. There’s no connection. Always stick to your gut. But I would only do overnights with well established cuddlers. As soon as someone blatantly disregards my pricing, I see that as a disrespect to me. It wasn’t even an ask from him. It was an immediate “this is what you’re going to do”… absolutely not.

AlyLauren

Excellent points! I think I will just report and they can decide what to do. If nothing else, if he ends up with multiple reports then it will be more clear he doesn't respect the site or boundaries. Thanks for your input, everyone!!

AlyLauren

Update! I did go ahead and report it and just put in the notes that I wasn't sure but felt weird. And he's already been banned! Good call everyone! 😂

Sheena123

👏 👏👏👏👏

Carrie_Anne

That’s awesome and since you did that, you prevented something really bad happening to someone else on this site. (Hopefully he won’t just come back with a new profile.)

Quel

Personally I would never do an overnight with someone I never met with before. Asking for an overnight off the jump is a red flag to me. I'm glad you reported in the end.. pushing alcohol and dinner to get you to agree to a session should always be a no.

CuddleDuncan

I had someone reach out from another state with a booking request. No message or introduction. So I responded saying we needed to have some discussion before booking. He's new to the site, no karma, no photos.
He said he is visiting Colorado and wants an overnight session

Such approaches are always nefarious. Immediate Block and Report, nothing to think about. Cuddling is not the only industry to suffer from these criminals.

He's not looking for a non-platonic meeting. He, assuming it really is a he which is likely but not certain, is seeking to manipulate you into behaviour you wouldn't otherwise do. The top prize for them is to get you to turn up at the hotel having paid for it yourself. They will never leave home, obviously.

Genuine out of town visitors approach you in a very different way, usually with a detailed message about why they are coming and so on.

When in doubt, Report. Always. That is a very clear instruction from the Mods.

With suspicious first messages, a good tip is to ask for a photo and/or some form of ID. Photos can easily be attached to messages. The response is usually very telling - as a rule genuine clients agree or at least enter into a polite conversation about how to cross the hurdle: fake ones get angry.

lovingspoonfull

Lots of good feedback here. Only thing i’d add; even if he was “on the level” and would not be a predator…. Nothing about what you described seems like he sees you as a real person. But rather a product to be acquired.

You’re not a commodity.

That’s not worth your time and care.