Cuddling/talking as an introverted person

I'm going to be honest. I don't like talking. I mostly listen to other people talk and then respond, but when other people ask me something about myself, I stutter! I think I will never become a great cuddler because of this. Please tell me most people prefer to be in silence while cuddling.

Great_Hugger

I used to stutter in jr high and high school, and then I overcame the more conversations I had. I still stutter occasionally for a word or two, but that's it.

Elrondish

You’re allowed to prefer cuddling in silence. This is a great opportunity though to practice conversations about things you’re comfortable with. Maybe even enthusiastic about! The world isn’t really built for introverts(and night owls). It helps to be able to rise to meet the chatty people on occasion.

But silence is okay too

pmvines

Different people have different personalities. You only just joined. You will find folks who prefer silence. Just make your preferences known and there's nothing wrong with asking the person if silence is ok.

GuyverGordon

@PillowPetals
I can totally understand this. I always dread the "tell me about yourself" question. For me, it is too open ended; I don't ever know which avenue to take ... so i often stay put. Or if a give an answer it most certainly isn't of any substance (at least, I don't think it is ...)

disneysamurai

Do what you’re comfortable with. The space is for you. At the same time maybe it’s a good chance to practice being comfortable talking.

Your ability to deeply hold silence MIGHT be a strength, instead of a weakness!! Some chatty folks, like myself, can find solace and peace in the presence of a Quiet One who simply wishes to hold, squeeze, and cuddle us. At that point, the words seem like a waste of time!!

Don't EVER let yourself believe that your Peace, your Quiet is a problem. You're showing yourself willing to cuddle others... that, right there, speaks more loudly than words ever could!!

Give yourself permission to be, just EXACTLY how you are right now, and ALLOW your Vibe to attract your Tribe!

TheFunCartel

Mimes need cuddles too. But I would get claustrophobic cuddling in those boxes they are trapped in.

TheFunCartel

I always dread the "tell me about yourself" question.

So do I because it costs me money when I extend the session and it becomes an overnight because I have difficulty summarizing the answer because I talk in stories. This is why I bring my Curious George book, a feather, and a box of chocolates.

GuyverGordon

@TheFunCartel

wilderdude

Silence is great as well. I've had cuddle sessions where we will talk a mile a minute for a half hour and then have an hour of silence. Cuddle quite a bit with fellow introverts as well and i find that we are more comfortable talking to one another as opposed to 'outsiders' lol, if that makes sense. We kind of understand each other.

WestsideMarc

There’s a GREAT stutter related movie called The King’s Speech; I highly recommended it.

Stuttering is treatable too. (I wouldn’t be surprised if there was even an app for it or some AI thing)…

I talk all day long for my work and actually prefer less conversation in my cuddles. I even mention it in my profile.

TheFunCartel

I talk all day long for my work and actually prefer less conversation in my cuddles.

I talk a bunch for work as well, but sometimes I do become a chatterbox in a session. I think like anything else it depends on chemistry, my energy level at the time, and my mood. I won’t know until the session happens.

Cuddlesofcuddle

You are not alone, I don't like to talk either. That doesn't mean you won't make a great cuddler! As more cuddle opportunities have come I've grown to know a good balance of listening and talking. You'll find that balance stay positive

"You'll find that balance.." << PERFECT!! @Cuddlesofcuddle ~ It does happen, doesn't it? I'm glad your cuddle opportunities are increasing, too, and that you're learning more about yourself through the interactions!!

I hope the OP has received comfort, support, and encouragement from the responses and perspectives given here!

jmdank

@PillowPetals I test as an introvert but at times I can be very talkative, it depends on the person, I think just focus on finding someone you vibe with, personally I don't think talking is a big deal beyond getting to know the person and vetting them to make sure you're compatible and they are safe, in fact being a good listener I think is a big advantage, don't give up too easily and remain positive, I think you'll be fine

penguin34

I have cuddled with introverts, very shy people and have had entire cuddle sessions in compete silence. I, on the other hand, have ADHD and rarely shup up usually , but I pick up on the vibe of the other person and go with it . Cuddling in silence is lovely as well. ☺️

KingsportCuddle

As an INFJ, I can relate. And the vibes can vary from session to sesion. Sometimes my cuddle buddy and I snuggle in silence. Sometimes they talk and I listen. Sometimes they engage me in a way that I find myself talking more than I would have expected. And sometimes we play background music to cut through the silence but still allows me to not necessarily have to chat. The good news is that talking isn't a prerequisite to a great cuddle session. Good luck to you!

great_pillow08

@PillowPetals How high my anxiety level is at the time determines how talkative I can be. If it's low, "silence is golden", but if it's high, I could use a sounding board- NOT A THERAPIST, JUST someone over the age of 2 to listen..

This world is ABSOLUTELY built for introverts- We just have to find our own definition of balance and group together accordingly. I'm an ISFJ who can SERIOUSLY go WEEKS without conversing with ANYONE about ANYTHING!! It helps me get back in touch with "me" and what I think and how I feel. I find "socializing" to be more of an activity for the purpose of finding validation and it's EXHAUSTING for me! 😮‍💨