It's about your personal boundaries and intentions and expectations.
Four out of the six people I've trusted enough to move off of the site with have sent inappropriate pictures within minutes. I don't go off of the site anymore.
I think OP was just relaying some experience and giving a friendly warning.
Not every red flag means war, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't be prepared.
Agreed @teapot. My experience exactly except with all of them. It' really is best to keep it here with built in sanctions and safeguards.
@teapot - you should report the people who sent you inappropriate pictures by text. Send a screenshot to @reurbo.
Everybody is different as long as the person doesn't ask right away you should be fine. Text back and forth for a day or two then exchange numbers give a text free number if thats makes you more comfortable.
Pretty much the only time I can imagine I would ask for or give my number to someone would be if we have plans to meet. Beyond that, this is a free site that is easily accessible, there's no reason to go off site.
I do think it's important to have that info when meeting, as a safety precaution and in case of getting lost etc. (GPS often takes people to the wrong place) Otherwise its easier on the site, and it gets confusing trying to match profiles up with numbers if several people are asking for texting.
90% of the time they send their number first because I'm super slow to give my number out.
But that's after a lot of constant interaction and at that point it doesn't really matter who gives their number first.
Same as a cuddle partner I have to feel comfy with the person.
I like to take the conversation to email sometimes. After all, I tend to write great long novels, and I like my formatting. Italics! Breaks! Tidy lists! Links without having the whole address right in the middle of an otherwise readable message!
But I generally only do this when I've made contact with somebody who I want to write a novel to, and who I know would enjoy getting a novel from me. With formatting. So yeah—there's probably no really good reason to take the conversation off the site unless you feel like you just can't live without italics or boldface text or non-ugly links... or if typing is really hard for you and you communicate much better using mouth-noise.
Some people have a terrible time communicating properly when they can't employ vocal tone and facial movement.
It's a surprisingly common limitation among allistics. Some people legitimately can't express themselves in words: they have to make noises with their mouths, move the tone of their voices up and down, contort their faces, and wave their arms around. If someone like that contacted me, I might agree to talk with them on Skype—because, frankly, they wouldn't be able to communicate otherwise.
Unless someone is profoundly allistic, though, there's probably no need to move the conversation to a different format in order to get to know them. Written language (even without formatting) is more than adequate for most people.
Even if they're allistic.
There are better messengers that I check far more often. As is the case with most of us here.
@DarrenWalker man nobody got time for LONG novels emails lol
-dont judge me for my opinion-
I do! I love to read and write long emails!!
Lol @PaulaDahla yeah ill have to agree if i lived in ND ill probably love long emails too because I wouldnt have nothing else to do
-dont hate me for my opinion-
I think it's up to the cuddler. Let them initiate off-site communications, which many do. But then don't abuse that trust - I tend to only respond to their texts, and it's most often just for clarification purposes for an appointment. If I want to check in to see how they're doing, I ask permission first and, if granted, I do so very rarely.
Safety and comfort above all else. Even one's own wants or needs.
I think taking it to other apps is preferable for messaging purposes. What are you afraid of moving to kik? If there are any red flags to be seen, they'll be observed even faster on an instant messaging platform.
It would make sense to me that in making final arrangements for a session, especially if one or both were traveling a distance, or alternate accommodations, like a hotel room were required, a phone call might be needed But I feel that when a member of a site wants to take it to another site, it’s because they want to take the conversation outside of the boundaries of the current site. Either that, or they have already behaved badly and expect to be banned at any minute. I don’t necessarily think your a bad person if you want to go to a site where you can exchange more revealing photos, but please don’t lie about it (not aimed at anyone in particular) and think about the possibility that you might be something of a minor league predator if you spend time and effort recruiting women on a non-sex site for sexual purposes.
Don’t hate me for my holier than thou attitude