Devices allowed during cuddle sessions

PaulaDahla

If there is a thread about this already I do apologize and please point me over there .

What is the opinion on having devices on and within reach while having a cuddle? To me I refuse to have it on if for some reason I need to bring it in with me.

I think it's doing a disservice to both myself and my partner if we are always replying to texts, IM's, facebook, whatever.

For me a cuddle sesh is about being in the moment, present. Escaping the outside world. Giving & receiving in person.

Yes, someone can ALWAYS make a case for why they can't be without it for 30 minutes, 60 minutes, 90 minutes, but if you can't be disconnected for a short amount of time what is the purpose of in person contact?

Thoughts?

Sorry I messed up the poll, devices allowed should have been an option.

Whisper5

I agree that they shouldn’t be used during a session. I do use mine to set an alarm for the end of the cuddle session. My cuddle space doesn’t have any clocks.

quietman775

One cuddle pro I met started scrolling through her texts while I spooned her. Not appreciated. It's all personal preference of course. Some people view a cuddle as two people being close together while interacting with some device --- say, watching a movie. I want my cuddles to be two people interacting with each other, period. No electronics allowed.

tallteddy

Jus yesterday, a friend of mine spoke out about having a need for having people around her, preferably doing their own thing while she was doing hers. And she got a lot of replies of people who want to do the same. I think you could do that while cuddling as well. Wether it's an electronic advice or a book that takes your attention, you can both be in your own world, and still be cuddling each other. Keep in mind that it's not for everyone though. So if you like to do that sort of thing, discuss it with your cuddle buddy first.

PaulaDahla

Building upon @tallteddy's thoughts, would or does anyone enjoy sharing a book together? Like reading aloud? I had one person read me his poetry once. It was amusing because after every one he kept saying he couldn't believe he's sharing it with me! But besides the humor for both of us, after that first time he would make it a habit to read any new poetry he had written or just prose he wanted to share then we'd discuss it.
Listening to the sound of his voice as he became lost in the words was magical. I wish we were able to see each other again just for that reason! Alas, he was my first cuddle experience and as novices tend to do we eventually became sexually attracted to each other so I blew an amazing cuddle relationship. But learned from my mistakes!!

But now I always broach the idea with cuddlers to see if reading aloud would be an option. I also like the idea of being quietly wrapped in your own thing while cuddling. I have a teacher friend who is swamped with papers that need to be graded. I would assume that would be a great example of together but separate also.

Thanks Teddy, I wouldn't have thought about that myself.

AndiCuddles

I love to read out loud, and I just had a cuddler recommend it as an activity we could do together.

As far as devices... I text my safety person at the beginning of the session (and then at the end of the session, but not until I get back to my car). I also use mine as an alarm. I set it, then set my phone face-down for the session and don’t check it. HOWEVER, I definitely take it with me.

The only problem I’ve run into (once) is that I do leave my ‘favorites’ able to call me (I put it on Do Not Disturb mode so that only the people on my favorites can call me). The only people on my favorites list are my husband, kids, and father. My husband and kids know where I am and not to call unless it’s an emergency. My dad doesn’t call me very much, but he’s 81 and not in the best of health, so he’s on the list (also in case of emergency). He did once call during a session, though, because we had a funeral to attend the next day and he wanted to get the details straight. I felt really badly that the session got interrupted, but it wasn’t exactly a typical situation.

So, I use my phone. But almost never during a session. And I try to get to sessions a little bit early (if it’s okay with the client) so that the phone setting doesn’t take time away from the session.

alexb2

I am okay with both partners having devices. It can make your cuddle session longer if you have something interesting to watch or read.

UKGuy

For me it would be unforgivable for a pro to be checking her device when I have paid for her time.

CreativeCuddles

@UKGuy I am with you. You are paying for their time you should have it.

No devices allowed.

If they sneak a peek they get gently bombarded with cute snarky remarks until they exclaim "Ok! Geez I got it", then gently elbow me in the gut.

Lovelight

5-10 minutes if urgent, or just to say like I'll call you back is acceptable. If we are interacting together, watching a movie/listening to music together it's alright. There is a bit of leeway though staying in the moment together is really important. I can't comment for pros because I so far don't associate with. Though even for them I could be okay with for similar.

Mike403

I used it to share something such as a YouTube video I found interesting. It's rude to use it for any other purpose such as checking email, Facebook, etc...

PaulaDahla

@chococuddles

Suzanne

I would NEVER check my phone during a cuddle session! It’s turned to silent and put away. Maybe I’m old fashioned but I remember a time when we were not so connected. We lived. We will continue to live if we’re unavailable for a couple of hours. I want my cuddle partner to feel like there’s nothing more important than them when they’re with me. I will use a tablet for music and have shared some short videos or something like that if it pertains to the client but otherwise absolutely not.

Sideon

Yes, for phone and bluetooth speakers, but no one's touching a phone while cuddling. If they have something to do, then they can do it elsewhere on their own time. Buh-bye.

A group of friends and I have a rule when we go out to restaurants: the person that checks their phone during meals is the person that buys. It's about mutual respect and creating quality time.

I put my phone on Vibrate for calls and I silence all notifications. I make sure to give my cuddle partner back the time I spent distracted and I'm sure they will understand if I take an emergency call.

In my opinion the purpose of meeting someone to cuddle is to have non sexual physical touch which is good for both parties mentally. The point is to have human contact which well need more of and less of electronics. I think when you are spending time with a friend or a cuddle partner it's rude to be on your phone so have it on do not disturb. Set the do not disturb exceptions for important things such as a text or call from a landlord, boss or someone you're waiting for important info from but that's it.

CuddleStella

As a professional, I only use it as an alarm and maybe to text my safety person. They’re the only ones who bypass the do not disturb option and I figured anybody else who needed me as an emergency could and should reach out to them if I don’t respond my phone.

Thankfully no interrupted sessions to this day. Music may be played out of my phone but I wouldn’t touch it during the session as long as the music is set to a good playlist.

I am a small business owner (contractor) with 1-2 employees. If one of them calls, I need to answer. If I don't, production may come to a halt. Keeping in mind that I opt for longer cuddle sessions (2-5 hours), am I being unreasonable answering this call? This has only happened only once during the few (less than 10) sessions I have had. In order to schedule a session, I normally have to take the day off.

CreativeCuddles

@creedhands I think that’s a situation in itself.
That’s your source of income and I think as long as you say something prior to the cuddle they would understand.

PaulaDahla

@shan79x what a good point, thank you

Thanks, @CreativeCuddles . I felt guilty checking my phone. But I did mention to my cuddle buddy before we began that I might be receiving an important call or text. She told me it was fine, (and she came back for seconds), so it must not have been a big deal. I just wanted to get another opinion.

CreativeCuddles

I don’t think most pro’s wouldn’t have an issue when it’s your company now if you want to call in a pizza order she may hold her arm around your neck a little tighter while you cuddle! ?

calineur

I did not click on this thread at first because I thought that it was about cuddle assisting devices ☺️.

Now that I know, however, if I do a long session and I am not trying to sleep, I enjoy sharing funny videos or music such as from youtube. I used a television set but if lying in bed I could see using a phone to do that.

cuddlerforu24

It’s not a problem .

stellarlovee

my cuddle partner & i do not use phones at all, and our sessions last for a long time but it doesn’t bother us as we are really caught in the moment & enjoy the closeness.

CuddlyKenneth

I have used my phone or tablet during a cuddle session for music, Netflix, or to show pics of different cuddle positions, but never for texting or browsing the internet.