Hey, OK I'm new to this site. A guy and I got talking and we are arranging to meet and cuddle. But he doesn't have a photo up. Is it rude of me to ask for a photo before we meet up?
It's usually considered a good idea to be able to recognize the person you're meeting, so I don't think asking for a photo would be rude.
Practicality aside, there are also safety considerations. Even I (faceblind as I am) make sure somebody knows what the stranger I'm meeting looks like, just in case things go sideways.
I think its practical you wanna know who your talking too
Exactly @DeathbyChocolat... , By the way, I haven't had any opportunity to land there where you are. but I'm still attentive to that.
I'm not quite sure how seeing a photo protects anyone from anything. Seeing a (potentially doctored) photo doesn't provide you a person's criminal history. In several midwest US states, everyone's court records (civil and criminal) are available online free of charge. It would be a far safer option to spend $2 to buy a cup of coffee and meet your potential cuddler in a public coffee house and chat for a bit. At that point, you could ask your potential cuddler for a full name so you can either run a free court records check (in the places that have them), or pay to have a records check run if you are in a jurisdiction that doesn't offer this service free online. A court records check will tell me if a person has been convicted of assault. A photo won't do this.
@MKECuddleGirl a picture would be a nice introduction to knowing who you are intending to meet. But of course you have to use all your senses to identify if you feel safe with a person.
Not rude at all
No, a photo doesn't give you a person's criminal history. But willingly handing over a photo prior to meeting someone does do a few things that I think are helpful. 1) It helps you recognize the person you're meeting. If you show up to a coffee meetup prior to a cuddle session and the person who approaches you looks nothing like the photo they sent, you'd immediately know something was seriously wrong. 2) It is something that can be shared with a trusted third party in case something happens. When I go to a cuddle session, I tell a friend who I'm meeting, where I'll be, and when I'll be back. I give them all the info I have on the stranger I'm meeting for the first time that day, including their photo. 3) It's a small extension of trust. When I send a photo to someone, I'm making myself recognizable. I'm no longer anonymous. I've chosen to voluntarily give up the safety of my anonymity for that person.
No, it's not rude to ask for a photo. I consider it rude of him not to have offered to send you one.
When I joined this site last summer I was only approached by men who had a photo along with a detailed profile. This made me feel a lot safer, like what we were doing was respectable, and like I could start a conversation on here before deciding to meet. Over the months since then the number of men with no photo and no detailed profile has increased until it's almost all who approach me. It goes along with the rise in men who ask to "book a session" in their first message, usually for the same day. I am not a pro. If a member's intentions are good I think they should try to get over the shame of being on here and identify themselves in their profile with an accurate, recent photo. I always ask for a photo and engage in conversation before considering a meet.
@snuggleup101 agreed. 100%.
There should be no reason to have a fear of being identified on a non dating, non hookup, friendly platonic touch only website. Unless of course you aren't here honestly. At least put up a picture of a favorite book or the scales of justice, or a lemon puff! At least put the minimum of effort into a representative picture if you expect a woman to put any time into you! It takes what, less than 5 minutes to do a quick image search and cut and paste. Probably less than 3 minutes honestly.
I just look at those anonymous men as a great filter system, if they don't want to put in the effort and can't even take the time to notice that there is NO pink bar next to my picture saying professional they aren't worth the time. There should be no shame in being on here.
But I do talk regularly with some high profile news-makers on here, either in their local community or nationally. Having their picture would be attention getting yes. So I understand some men's reluctance to post pictures of themselves. But each one of those men have sent me pictures of themselves either with the first message or upon request. How would I know they are news-makers otherwise? Two of the men I converse with and will eventually cuddle are national names. Here on this site, an author and a lawyer. But I talk with doctors and businessmen also. They all use code names and either have the annoying blue/pink couple or a representative picture.
In fact I'm a bit surprised by some of the names that are members on this site. But I suppose I shouldn't be should I? Every person: big or small; world famous, infamous, or only a big name in his cat's eyes; we all crave human touch. Who knows, maybe Prince William is on here, or Kanye West. Maybe Kate and Kim aren't good cuddlers or aren't willing to give them enough time. Maybe if the owner of the New England Patriots was on here he wouldn't be having the trouble he's having currently!
Have pictures ready guys. Come on! There should be no shame in wanting or needing cuddles.
@PaulaDahla if ROBERT Kraft was on here CC would not be the same based on why trouble he’s in right now.
Thank you everyone for your opinions. I will admit that having a photo before meeting will definitely make me feel better about meeting him. I will be asking for a photo before any meetings happen
I mean, I don't mind being asked of a photo as long as they aren't suggesting nudes or something. Not rude. Just don't be rude about it.
However, I do believe in quid pro quo. I once booked a session with a woman who had a head shot and was very pretty. When I got to her place she must have weighed 400lbs. I now ask for a full body photo with no exceptions. While men can be deceptive so too can the female cuddlers.
How was she deceptive? Was she charging you or saying she's skinny? Not everyone assumes weight matters. If it's important to you then mention it. Communication. I wrote in my profile that I'm fat and I don't care. Someone asking me for a body pic while I have several face pics up, would instantly making me doubt that the intentions are platonic. But I get messages from non pics profiles only so all I ask for is a picture.
@BashfulLoner ya never know! Maybe he would've kept it legit. : ) But as an aside I did get a tremendous chuckle out of that whole story because I had just read a story about Asian Massage Parlors and the far reaching consequences of them. As the news was reporting how the mighty had fallen it reminded me of the books villain and how he fell with a mighty fall also. But of course it was Christian fiction so the ending had a different, better focus. I have to admit after being thoroughly amused by the parallels, since the story even took place around the Boston area! Not the scandal but Mr Kraft. I did have to send a request that the young ladies in the real life ASP's were able to find the same help the one's in the book found. One more instance of life imitating art; an unfortunate one at that. It was a great story with lots of action for Christian fiction, a real guy's guy type of read. A bit too many fight, vehicle and weapons details for my taste but most men would love it including Dojo's(not the name used in the book) and heavily trained men busting in with Chinese messages on their t-shirts, forcefully removing any young ladies that wanted to leave and subduing any resistance found in the Parlors. Makes me curious if that's the way it went down in real life also??? Probably not.
But yes, to agree with the majority. There is no harm in asking for pictures of a possible cuddler before meeting. Men deserve a current full body picture just as much as a woman does. Only one man hasn't provided me with a full length, just lots of head shots. Every other man complied with my request, in fact one man actually had a few group shots with fellow employees which was nice. I got to compare him to different men and I saw a bit of his personality come through since he was hamming with the guys. I keep a full length handy just for that purpose, short and curvy can be taken many ways!
Good luck Snugglekitten91, I hope it happens and that it's a good match for you.
As long as both parties are participating, great. If it's a one-sided expectation, then no, thank you, next.
I'm okay with full-body pics or Christmas Story bunny onesies, but I draw a line at evening gowns and two-piece bathing suits. Awkward.
@Sideon - Damn, and I had my heart set on seeing you in a red sequinned dress slashed up to your thigh and an excessive feather boa.
@Sideon One piece bathing suit then?
@BlueIris You all know i am the only one who can pull off the sequinned dress/boa combo around here!
@pmvines - Hell's bells. Forgot about that!!