New Relationship Energy

TisDoneyTisDoney
in General

So there is a phenomenon that occurs that makes you feel like you are on drugs when you have a special new encounter with someone that you feel sparks with. This is called new relationship energy (NRE), and I believe that is part of what is happening during cuddle sessions. It is a term that is usually found in the polyamorous world, but needs to become more recognized here. This video talks about what it is and how to handle it.

Have you ever experienced NRE? What did it feel like for you?

Comments

  • [Deleted User]CharlesTwisted (deleted user)
    edited April 2019

    It is a built in “feature” of human evolution, and allows us to form new bonds, and groups, in the event of loss of our previous groups.

    It helps to keep in mind that we evolved from a prey species that adapted to disaster after disaster...

  • TheFunCartelTheFunCartel

    Uh, it is because you are on drugs. When you make a new friend, or a new crush or you just like a person because you enjoy your time with them the body releases PEA, dopamine and all sorts of other chemicals.

  • CatloafCatloaf

    Yep, and the reason it seems to be happening during cuddles is because the same neuropeptides (oxytocin) and neurotransmitters (dopamine, serotonin) are involved. Funnily enough that she mentions it's like the brain being on drugs, because it's totally true. You're high on somebody else, quite literally. And just like with real drugs, you've got to be careful who you're doing them around because some people will use that state of mind to their advantage (aka narcissists).

    What a wonderful feeling though. I'm separated from my husband right now due to a family emergency I had to move for, and we've been involved for 8 years (married for 2 as of September). We've seen each other once in the last month, and boy lordy, are we ever getting the rushes we used to get years ago when I'd have to sneak out at night just to see him. :3 <3

  • HappinessHenryHappinessHenry
    edited April 2019

    @TisDoney Thank you. What an interesting post. I believe you are absolutely right that this can be one of the biochemical "payoffs"of the cuddling experience. And it is not just restricted to the actual cuddling act. I just recently experienced it simply from an intellectually stimulating and emotionally heartening message correspondence with someone on this site.

    PS On a completely different note, though this totally betrays my over emphasis on appearance, after the last year of a succession of therapists who looked like Mr Burns from the Simsons, I am more than a little jealous of you people in the US who have therapists, like the one in the video, who look like a 1950's pin-up (Jane Russell/Bettie Page).

  • UKGuyUKGuy

    I think this video is talking about extroverts. Introverts experience things quite differently.

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