I commonly find myself cuddling with people who cannot tell their partner that they want to cuddle other people. The usual response is, "Oh, they would never let me."
My question is, how would/have people actually talked about it with their partners? What were their reactions? Or what is the fear of asking?
I gather that mostly this comes up because the partner has some insecurities that may need to be addressed, and usually that stems from unmet needs or they lack confidence in some aspect of their lives. Perhaps I am wrong or there is more to that story, but that is what I have usually found in my research.
I know that commitment is important in relationships, but I also wonder what "commitment" is defined as in relationships these days?
The next question after that tho is, has what you defined it as been your experience? Like say, you believe commitment is only sharing intimacy with one partner, and you cannot have that with others without taking away from your primary partner. Then that is followed up with the question, "Has that been your actual experience?"
In the polyamory world, bringing up the subject of "I would like to open up our monogamous relationship" is hard, very scary, and quite risky.
At what point does it become better to just do what you want vs having that conversation?
Is sacrificing physical touch worth keeping a relationship or would that drive you into depression?
How do you handle these competing beliefs, aka cognitive dissonance?
Message me if you don't feel safe talking about this on this thread?