Yes what are other things that we can do? Go to a bar and drink? Go out and run? Go to the gym?
Can anyone suggest please.
Post on a friendly forum. Watch a movie, at the cinema.
Are you talking in general or the Christmas season?
@FunCartel in general. But yes winter season is really quite depressing.
A lying face down extended backrub, hard or soft can do wonders. Running actually increases oxytocin similar to snuggling. Documented, but don't know why. In winter, learning winter physical activity can help greatly. Skiing- downhill or cross country, skating- figure or hockey, snowshoeing, power sports less physical but at least u get out. Whatever u pick, dress in layers appropriate to sport & get psyched about it so u look forward to it.
Therapy, exercise, dance, a hobby, massage, helping someone else, volunteering, being with animals, being with children, being with the elderly, artistic expression, build something, being in nature, audiobooks.
Tried meditation? Its easier using an app .. try mindspace
@mattcuds I have headspace
@alphares aside from mere distractions, you might want to do research on the causes of the symptoms you described. If you believe the cause to be due to the season change, have you researched the possible benefit of vitamin D?
Also, try volunteering.. you get to meet people and you get a nice sense of doing good to others
@alphares Go with friends to a comedy club.
Our brains are wired to be less enthusiastic when the season and weather are bad ; because if we want to go hunter-gathering in the cold and dark, it will only lead to frustration.
@alphares it depends on what you like. Or, what you like when you're in a less stressed/depressed/anxious/down mood. (Not making light of the situation, I do have these too)
For me, I hate strenuous physical activity most of the times. If someone forces me to go hiking, for example, when I am not ready, my cortisol levels spike and I get really irritable. But I enjoy inline skating. So sometimes when the mood strikes, I would just put them on to roll around.
It really depends on what you like/used to like.
Perhaps it would be just resting in bed with a book. Playing with an animal. Taking a warm shower with nice smelling soaps. Running a luxurious bath. Sitting by the lake with your legs submerged to the midcalf. Volunteering. (I used to think it might do me good to help people, since I am predisposed to help people.. but volunteering actually literally drains me because I absorb all the painful feelings. So it is out, for me.)
Try to remember what it was that you used to enjoy. Start small. Do them more again, especially in this winter season. It's depressing, I agree. It might be the case of what you used to enjoy, you do not anymore. And it's okay.
I enjoy activities in the "sweet spot" between intellectually engaging, and psychologically stressful. As @Windchime suggested, skating ; needing enough concentration to keep one's mind out of the dark place, but not too scared that things will go wrong. They say ( often of children ), "The Devil makes work for idle hands". Perhaps the key to good mental health is that, "The Devil ( in ourselves ) makes work for idle minds".
Hanging out with family and/or friends works for me. Or sometimes I just want to be alone then I watch movies by myself. Once I get engrossed in the movie, I forget everything else.
Create a set of routine habits that you break down into small tasks. Small tasks that build you up and motivate you to stick to them.
It could be a new habit you want to build or one you want to rediscover. I say habit because you want to practice an activity that you build into your everyday routine and make your own. A hobby is more like a fun thing to do. You want something you feel motivated to keep doing without being affected by your mood. A hobby is good if you make it part of what you do everyday.
One gentleman told me he likes to make things with his hands. He makes cabinets, builds cars out of junk scrap he takes from junk yards. Each year he takes on a project and builds something. That he says keeps him out of boredom and trouble. Each day he takes an hour or two to work on his projects. And that becomes part of his routine
Bestselling Author James Clear, wrote a book called Atomic Habits. In that book he talks about making and breaking down small every day tasks as part of your routine. Someone talked about skating in this thread. Skating becomes an activity you build around the habit of getting up and doing stuff to keep you active. A small task like gathering your boots and all the other equipment you need is mentally built into preparing to skate. And those simple small tasks build on each other. Even eating as in prepping a meal becomes part of the skating activity. They're habits you build around the activity of skating. Those habits become motivators to keep you positive and interested.
That's just one thought. I'm sure there are many others.
Think about hunting—not actually going hunting, but imagining it. Once you see Bambi running for her life you realize things could be worse; you could be Bambi.
@geoff1000 "I enjoy activities in the "sweet spot" between intellectually engaging, and psychologically stressful."
What are some such activities you enjoy? I did not and do not really think of skating as something to really focus on, since I don't really progress beyond my current proficiency level. Just happy to roll around. Something strange about skating that actually releases the vice-like hold my anxiety has on my heart. It makes me feel free and the tension releases.
I sleep like 20 hours a day.
@BigGuyGa Because of depression? Because that is seriously not good for your heart or kidneys.
@Windchime When I'm skating, I'm trying hard to not fall over, but not too scared about doing so. Same for walking over rough terrain. When I'm watching a movie thriller, or a similar book, I'm enjoying the stress of the event, without actually fearing it will happen to me. Ballroom dancing was good, the concentration I needed for the steps, kept me from thinking about the woman I was holding in my arms. I remember having a conversation with a young woman on an airplane, who to this day is probably certain that I am petrified of flying.
In no particular order...
Try the app called “meetup”. You can find local groups that share your interests, and actually meet people in person 😃
Get a 1 hour massage. It sucks that as a man people make jokes and think men only go get massages to get a happy ending after. But really it will make you feel better.
The biggest step I took this year in overcoming depression (which may not apply to you) was to remove myself from an extremely toxic relationship. It was months after that I emerged from my depression, but that was the first step for me. Two other things that helped me tremendously were...
I hope this helps someone!
Daydream of ways to make my enemies pay for their atrocities
@pmvines You must have read Trump’s book.
I’ve dealt with depression for most of my life. Over time, I came to the conclusion that depression is an entirely sensible response to existing. It doesn’t feel overly great, which can be problematic at times, but when has reality ever shaped itself to suit the preferences of the sentient?
Then again: I’m not afflicted by a positivity bias, and when it comes to concepts conjured up by back-slapping sapiens, I feel that optimism is hollow.
Anyways, I find self-negation liberating, to an extent. Coloring is nice.
Fact of the matter is there isn’t a solution for everyone—there is only something that works for you. Isn’t that a depressing thought?
Check to see if there are flotation tanks nearby. They're very relaxing. 😌
@jeanpierre That features at the end of "Angel has Fallen"