Anyone else feel this way...

Isn't it a bit sad that there's enough people to warrent a site like this? Like is this because how techie everything is or something else? Does anyone feel embarrassed opening an account here? I mean I havent cuddled with someone in almost 10yrs. I feel like this makes me look desperate. And that this might be unsafe. (Sorry if this seems like a ramble or too many questions)

That's an interesting way to think of it. I never thought of it as being embarrassing but vulnerable. I'd cuddle you up, but you shouldn't have too many problems. It might be an esteem booster for you. Happy cuddling.

snugbuddy

I'm not sure what you mean by sad. I hope you don't mean pathetic. That's one of the cruelest words there are. So you are desperate, who cares? Life isn't high school where everyone is jostling for esteem and embarrassed if they don't go to the prom. Or if it is I'm not aware having worked in my own business for years away from any bull that may or may take place in the world. Everyone isn't so perfect and popular that they can always find someone to cuddle with. I'm not sure who you are looking to cuddle with but many men looking for only women aren't going to be cuddling with anyone unless they come to a site like this and most likely pay for it. If you can find someone to cuddle with for free that's great, if not then take what you can get. You only live once and who gives a rats ahole what anyone thinks. When it's time to meet your maker where will they be.

littermate

"who gives a rats ahole" is a favorite now.

Personally, I feel like a revolutionary, a relational creative, someone going for the gusto! I don't want a lame-ass boring cultural-template-bound relationship right now, but snuggling with beautiful humans who also want to snuggle? The possibility of expressing one's heart in safe space? Affection, caring, love, and play without ownership? Without having to ride the romance->ownership->you're supposed to give me everything I need train that is the only sanctioned form of intimacy between humans in the U.S. of A and so often ends in the shitter?

I feel blessed to be on this site. I feel blessed by the folks I've cuddled so far. I feel like we are adding another option to our palette of the possible forms of love between humans. I hope it becomes mainstream. And I have to say, it beats wandering around in cafes looking for someone to be close to who will probably end up hitting on you or only viewing you through a particular lens. Here at least the context is (and many adhere to it) let's meet and snuggle. Human to human, heart to heart--sweetness!

Am I high on oxytocin because my cuddle angel just left?

Yes.

Would I write the same thing in the morning?

Absolutely.

biancalovecraft

That's sort of how I thought of it at first. My relentless morbid curiosity led me to cuddling, and I expected it to be all kinds of weird and maybe pathetic. I've gotten a very humbling lesson, and so much insight in to the human condition, and myself. I want to encourage you to stick around awhile, be careful, be open, be loving, and see what you learn.

PeopleLikeUs

No. I think it's amazing that one minute I need to be hugged, the next I Google "Hug me now" and within a week in walks a woman to a restaurant I'm at, sits down and talks for 1/2 hour the then cuddles me for 3 hours in her car for free. That to me is mind-blowing.

I don't believe that cuddlers or tactile individuals are in the majority in this world. Now we have our own niche place to hang and whatever others think or can't comprehend doesn't matter. This place belongs to us and we're not like everyone else. I've also talked to those who can't do this who are envious of the fact that we can.

I'm so glad you've stepped up @ayva. You and someone else are going to be so happy and you'll both be able to peer out at the sad rat race and laugh. I guess in my own way I just agreed with you. So maybe I should have started this with a yes. Actually I'm not sure.

Rivka

I can relate, it is a commentary on how lonely people are, and specifically how men don't have emotional support or physical affection, and how they exclusively rely on women for emotional labor. I think there must have been lonely people all through history but it's true people have more social isolation now. Professional cuddling is fulfilling a need, so it should exist.

Years ago Cuddlr was an app and I wondered if I would get fewer clients because of it. That didn't happen. There are some things people can get from hiring someone that they might not from a mutual free meeting. If you hire someone it is geared toward being therapeutic for you, and you are less likely to be rejected for superficial reasons.

Lev136

Years ago I never thought I would be doing this. However , thankful that there is a place for me to go to find a person or more to cuddle with. Because of my current position in life, it helps me, leaves me more hopeful, feeling better about myself and I find after I cuddle I sleep better!!!

I just look at it as a normal part of my life, nothing else!! !

TheFunCartel

Boredom is a great motivator.

@ayva it sounds like you value happiness and feeling connected for it's own sake. That is within the context of offline social interaction. That it feels desperate for someone to seek a hug and connection from a total stranger on a medium that is impersonal. Hence it feels embarrassing because it also suggests a level of inadequacy in one's interpersonal relation skills as well as a level of social isolation. So much so that a website such as this one becomes a means for people to make such intimate connections. You seem baffled that such an intimate act as cuddling has become something sought and plied on the internet.

I'm just observing and making reflections of your sentiment based on what you said. And I acknowledge the sentiment as you expressed it.

Technology has made it more convenient to network and connect with others to engage in cuddling as well as many other activities. It has it's fair share of pros and cons which are as unique as the participants themselves.

It is interesting to think of cuddling as an activity that can be engaged from a virtual digital space. Ten years ago I never saw myself as being on a site like this let alone making connections to go hug someone. The very thought of it never even entered my mind. But circumstances create the motivation for new and/ or different ways of thinking and doing. When life happens and puts you on the periphery of human existence you start creating new neural pathways in your brain. So what seemed yesterday something that disinterested you become appealing tomorrow because life happened today.

That's just my honest, humble two cents. Yet I'm also grateful to have the opportunity to use a site like this in such a connecting way. It provides a wider dearth of opportunity to meet like minded people who share my vision and values in such a way that my connection with them becomes an enriching experience overtime. And it contributes to the building of a unique community.

Kense

Everybody does this for different reasons. Mine happens to be work stress-related, I find it works pretty good. Not everybody who does this is a weirdo with social problems.

In no way am I bring down this site for what it is, I dont want any misinterpretation. Its sad that not everyone can have human comfort. I personally lack social skills and Im awkward. So for someone like me it feels embarrassing. And like any other human. You always wonder if anyone else feels that same way you do. I do genuinely appreciate everyone taking that time to respond.

Kense

The reality is who cares what people think. I remember when it was taboo and weird to meet people off the internet. Seen as something that people with no social skills or losers did. Now it's normal, Many new things that don't fall into what's "normal" tend to get criticized by society's sheep.

Dante_S

@ayva sigh You're right. It would be great if we didn't need sites like this...

Personally I try to look at the other side of the coin, and celebrate the fact we do, and are ABLE to have a place like this...

I've had horrible social anxiety my entire life. (When I was young, going to a normal sit down restaurant would make me crazy sick to my stomach).

I think technology has brought far away people MUCH closer together, but has spread CLOSE people, much further apart.
(Ever 'like' someones post on Facebook that you see everyday, but never actually talk to them about it?)

But, try not to feel embarrassed... you're not alone

invisible87

I’m with you on that. I Feel the same way @snugbuddy

KariMeiSnuggles

I’m glad you joined so you can see what it’s like. Yes it can be dangerous meeting strangers online can always be but I have had way more good experiences than bad. I wish you lived closer to me I would offer a cuddle

geoff1000

A good coping mechanism for not reliably having something, is to convince oneself that one doesn't want it ; so it can be that the opportunity, seems to trigger the want, when it is actually only releasing it.
I don't know much about other cultures, but in Britain it used to be that male-female contact was only for sex ; and sex education was very much geared to explaining how that made a baby. Sex for fun was very taboo, and physical contact for its own sake was unheard of.
It was much more understandable to smoke or drink, using chemicals which mimic the body's own pleasure chemicals ; and much more reliable, because they can be bought on any street corner. Oxytocin withdrawal symptoms, are probably worse than those of other chemicals ; so it can be safer to abstain than to risk that.
If I can get ( temporarily ) in the head of boundary pushers, I think their goal is to trigger an addiction in their partner ( like a drug pusher, or "hooker" ) so they keep coming back for more.