How to avoid virtual cuddle chat scammers

deefine

After agreeing to time, price (with a pro), and a real-time communication method, make the booking; even if the agreement terms can't be selected, at least they'll be in messaging. With a non-pro, the same rules apply but there just won't be a booking and payment, because non-pros asking for money is against the rules of the site and don't have the booking feature on their profile.

Then, connect through the real-time communication method. Once that's done, ask to trade real-time selfies; if someone refuses, that's an indication that they're either not the person you thought or they look/are so different that it's the same alienating effect (I've seen pics that are 20 years old or from someone else completely, and not just on this site, or through texting).

Once that's passed, then connect through the real-time video chat method, so that you can see and communicate with the person directly to know whether they are what they indicated; only after that should you pay. Never pay before validating. If you don't pay after the video chat starts, then they can just end the chat; not much lost. I've done a few video chats using these methods, and in only one did the person refuse to trade real-time selfies or connect in real-time video chat before payment, and s/he told me s/he would be removing any mention of virtual chat on their profile (of course).

I'm just trying to drop some rules to avoid getting scammed, whether you enjoyed the session or not (scam or not). A lot of people are none the wiser (and maybe they ultimately got what they wanted, who knows). I know I enjoyed a few scam chats for a while before realizing they weren't legit; thankfully I didn't lose money, just time, and maybe a sad heart.

Regardless of whether my own profile pic of me exists or is fully accurate (I'm still not assured enough that this site won't leak it to the public internet or that someone I know in real life won't cause a problem for me with family/friends/associates just because I'm here, whether through ostracization or accusations of lack of professionalism), the above rules for virtual sessions are what I'm sticking to, pro or not, once payment is requested. Your own assuredness is beyond my responsibility. Leave any [un/related] criticism or advice or stories that you'd like. Thank you and have a good day. I don't know if I'll check this thread again.

MountainCuddles

A non pro cannot request payment. Please report anyone asking for money without being tagged as a pro.

deefine

@MountainCuddles A non-pro can't be booked, and booking is mentioned in my first sentence, but I've added clarification to the first paragraph so it should be obvious that I'm talking mostly about pros.

Update: I did learn one thing that may have a logic hole though, but here's my question about that: If someone books, then doesn't pay after start time, can the pro cancel the booking and get the 15% price obligation also cancelled?

If the pro has to be paid before the session starts to avoid losing 15% to someone who won't pay, then that's great for pro scammers. There's no escrow system here. Payment is done outside of the site. If a pro is paid before the session, then ditches, they can take the money and block the payer. I'm not sure how long a scammer can do this, but I've seen multiple accounts that looked like they were the same person (pro and non). I don't want pros or payers to lose money. I'm just stating my rules for protecting myself, but one pro here says she won't do that and I must pay first otherwise she loses 15%, but I'm not sure that she actually does if she does things right.

Leonora

Yes, the 15% fee can/will be canceled for a number of reasons so long as pros reach out to the admins or report an issue. Anything from someone flaking/canceling/no showing to violating terms of service and crossing boundaries with pros (the mods don’t make us pay 15% when we’re harassed or assaulted by clients). The fee is automatically withdrawn within the next 24-48 hours or so.