Article on Human Touch

Sunny_Ezri

Hi Fellow Cuddlers!

A quick read on the importance of human touch and affection and the epidemic of loneliness and depression compounded by the pandemic and subsequent lockdown orders. If ever you’re in doubt of the importance of your work and the service we provide this serves as a quick reminder to the difference being made just by offering support during these times.

Peace & Love,

Ezri 🦋

https://www.yahoo.com/lifestyle/happens-body-too-long-without-203600034.html

MazeField

yeah I haven't had a cuddle in yearssss. I don't really think about it too much though. I just try to stay busy with work and exercise. I have not felt depression in many yearssss too but I do agree in that it does feel lonely from time to time. everyone is different in their own way i suppose. I read the article. an interesting read thanks

Sunny_Ezri

Hi Maze! For sure, realistically, it’s another weapon, along with exercise, talk therapy, etc. in the arsenal against depression and anxiety. We all have our personal reasons and purpose for either providing or utilizing the services 🦋💕✨.

geoff1000

I read somewhere that the hormone that tells you that you've eaten enough, starts being released when the food is in a person's mouth, long before it is digested in the stomach. I suspect that cuddling is similar, in that it releases the pleasant hormone that tells you that you are in a stable and loving relationship, even if you aren't.

I'm not saying that's a bad thing, if you are feeling hungry, it can help to eat something with no nutritious content at all ; like a placebo can help when you are ill. However, it does rely on the mind "filling in the blanks". It uses either instinct or the conditioned reflex, for the trigger to have that effect. Being put in front of a firing squad is scary, if the person knows what comes next ; but if it happened twice a day for weeks on end, it would begin to lose that fear.

I therefore can't help feeling that the benefits of cuddling might "wear off" after a time, if the emotional connection isn't there.

Sunny_Ezri

Geoff Im going to go ahead and agree with you on your last statement, while I do feel that I provide a benefit to one time clients, the emotional connection with the regulars provides for an overall more consistently therapeutic, enriching and intimate experience built on a foundation of mutual trust and openness. My goal is to create an open, nonjudgmental, comfortable environment that not only provides the comfort of sensory and touch therapy but also facilitates conversation and honesty to build that relationship with the cuddler.

With that being said, I would argue that the hormones released (fight or flight reaction, cortisol) when faced with a firing squad are different than those released when cuddling, which include serotonin, dopamine and oxytocin.
There are numerous causes for depression and anxiety; at times those with depression are prescribed medication to compensate for brain chemistry where hormone levels (Serotonin etc.) are below normal, cuddling (along with exercise, meditation, etc.) has been shown to temporarily normalize or at least create a slight increase in said hormones.

If one is anxious or doesn’t feel completely comfortable in the environment they’re cuddling in or with the cuddle provider I would suspect the opposite effect.

geoff1000

@Sunny_Ezri
I wasn't saying that cuddling releases the same fight-or-flight hormones as a firing squad, though it might if it's been a very long time since the previous event. 😊

I was thinking that if cuddling occurs too often, particularly if without the deep and meaningful relationship that "should" go with it, one might become less sensitive to it ; like "olfactory fatigue" makes us gradually less sensitive to smells ( nice or nasty ) that we encounter regularly.

Perhaps it is like do(ugh)nuts. Having one or even several, occasionally, is a nice treat ; but having several every day, loses that feeling of "specialness". A weekend break is very enjoyable, much nicer than the weekend of holiday which occurs in the middle of a two-week holiday.

Sunny_Ezri

@Geoff A definite possibility!

I haven’t seen any studies on cuddle fatigue/desensitization but an interesting theory. There may even be the possibility that it could turn into a cuddle addiction, where one has a perceived increased need for it because of the desensitization.

Tbh I don’t know many who cuddle everyday for 8 hours daily. I personally prefer to Cuddle on specific days with spaced appointments (typically not taking more than 3 in one day 3 days weekly or even every other week) not just because of the need to say, change sheets, sanitize, shower, etc. But also because of the emotional surge (or sometimes drain) experienced; being fully charged, present, with my undivided attention and giving each client the best experience possible requires this (at least for me).

With that being said I’ve found that each client is different, some have a preference for anonymity, not wanting to divulge much personal information, they're there specifically for the touch or embrace, enjoying peace and quiet and then others who enjoy the talk therapy along with the cuddle. Some are cuddle hoppers, others have several favorites, each one offering something different, and then of course there are those you’ve built a bond with.

In Spanish we have the phrase, “para el gusto, los colores” literally translated “for the taste, the colors” More broadly it means, we as people are free to form our own thoughts, opinions, tastes, similar to the English idiom, “different strokes for different folks” 😊, I suppose it’s applicable here in every sense of the word.

And the mear mention of doughnuts...now you’re speaking my love language 🌸😊 (I haven’t tried desensitizing myself to them but challenge accepted!).

Sideon

Timely article. Thank you for this, @Sunny_Ezri .

I love that phrase...

I began reading articles on human touch in March of 2005. One of the most memorable ones from my early research was The Caring Touch by Carolynne Stevens. Today all I can find is a condensed version here: http://www.toddlertime.com/dx/regression/touch.htm