🎈🎈 The Return of DarrenWalker 🎈🎈

DonLonG

Hey look everyone, CC's prodigal son returns! The Peoples Champion, practitioner of logic and reason on the forums bringing us back to a sobering reality when the random chaos gets a little too off track. What adventures have you been on in your absence? I was in Colorado a couple days ago thinking about you, but now your profile says North Dakota, did you move?

I know there's a pandemic on and we are all taking precautions. But leave it up to @DarrenWalker to take it the extreme. It was supposed to be just social distancing, not social media distancing. Also 6 feet, not 6 months you silly goose.

We missed you, my friend. @pmvines tried to summon you back. I even researched an old post explaining how to summon you. The forums haven't been the same without you. Welcome back!


P.S. Does anyone here have a favorite @DarrenWalker post to help new members in the last 6 months know who this legend is?

quixotic_life

🥰🎉🎆✨🎇🎊WHOO!!!

Welcome back @DarrenWalker !!!

Just one of many...
https://www.cuddlecomfort.com/forum/discussion/comment/75288#Comment_75288

pmvines

@quixotic_life see, you said his name three times and there he is 😋

littermate

Woohoo @DarrenWalker returns!!! Happy dance! Confetti!

Favorite @DarrenWalker post: all of them.

Thanks @DonLonG. Speak to us @DarrenWalker !

hogboblin

Well, hey. Who would have thought I'd actually be missed? Thanks, guys! Be sure you don't regret this summoning. More seriously, here's what happened:

I explained that non-sexual attraction of mine to a young woman who insisted she wanted a more than simply friendly relationship with me and wouldn't take "Ahaha, no, I'm pretty sure you don't" as an answer. (Spoiler: once I'd explained what that entailed, sure enough, she didn't.) Going to the CC mods, she said I'd done... something? I don't know what, because she didn't tell me. All I heard was that I'd been accused of "disturbing behavior," which isn't quite fair! All I did was answer a question, and it's not even as though I did it in person—only text over Skype.

In any case, my account was essentially unusable for me for so long that I gave up checking to see whether I was back yet, and so I have no idea when, exactly, my account was opened back up for me. I was busy with other things. Which brings me to the next piece of adventure:

My landlords decided to sell the place I was renting out from under me!

Since this was in May, I didn't think they'd have much luck. Who, after all, is going to go around touring houses for sale in the middle of a worldwide plague? As it turns out, a lot of people. So it was that I had total strangers tramping through my home in the middle of the day for weeks on end. Yes—during a pandemic.

As some of you know, my immune system has historically been pretty dang weak. So this didn't thrill me in what one might call a good way. In fact I was pretty well panicked.

"This is my home," I said.
"This is the only place I have to be safe!" I said.
"Please don't do this to me," I pleaded.
"I don't have anywhere else to go," I told my landlords.
"I can barely afford to pay rent here!" I reminded them.
"Take pity on me?" I wondered.

$900 a month for a one-bedroom apartment, you see, isn't terribly unusual in Grand Junction. And with minimum wage what it is... well, I was working two jobs and barely making $500 monthly. Ah, the downsides of disability! It's so inconvenient to have a body that collapses if you try to work more than thirty hours a week... or step out of doors while the sun's up.

My landlords explained that the rent they were getting from me wasn't enough, that they needed to sell the house I was inhabiting the basement of, that this meant they needed to parade strangers through my living space, and that if I didn't unbarricade the doors and let them do this right now they would evict me on the spot. This being the case, I unbarricaded the doors. I mean, if your options are "possibly die of plague" vs. "definitely die on the street," I'd say the logical choice is fairly obvious. Assuming you want to live. If you don't want to live I suppose the choice is equally obvious, but it would be the other one....

Well, they found a buyer.

"All right, you need to be out of this place by the end of June," they told me. Ahahaha. Right. Well. Where was I going to go? In the middle of a pandemic? With no money?

It was about this time that the stimulus check arrived. Impeccable timing, really. And then hogboblin mentioned, yet again, that where he lives rents are lower and income is higher.... Well, the logical choice was obvious. Up to this point I'd preferred to remain in Grand Junction because that's where my family was, but what good was my family doing me now? There's only so much support you can ask from your parents when they have nine other children to deal with!

So it was that I moved to North Dakota.

It took me a while to settle in after I'd arrived (I still don't have all the bookcases I need), and I didn't have an internet connection of my own for quite a while. Let's see... yeah, August 29th was when I got back online again. Took me a while to check CC! It's good to be back. And now I gotta go to work!

Later, everybody... and thanks again.

littermate

Woot! So much welcome back @DarrenWalker. I am glad you didn't die of either condition.

Hi @hogboblin.

I'm about to go from Colorado to Lawrence, Kansas for a similar reason - no eviction, but cheaper to live there than here and I want a year to clean my palate in a new place where I know no one.

Mike403

I bought my place in 2008 when it was cheap. I pay about $500/month for both my mortgage and HOA payments combined for a 750sqft condo.

Sideon

Welcome back, @DarrenWalker !

geoff1000

You are one of ten children !

Yikes.

sillysassy

Awwwwwwww @DarrenWalker so so so glad to see you and so sorry to hear about your unfortunate turn of events that carried you away from our lovely state. I am absolutely CERTAIN that Mr. Hogboblin is so happy to have you geographically closer though. We have MISSED YOU!!!! 💕♥️🌸

@DonLonG 😂😂😂 “not social media distancing” HahahHa EXACTLY!!
What a fabulous idea for this post!! You are 100% spot on.... Newbies need to know. I will have to do a little digging for a FAVORITE post.... I’m with @littermate and her explanation of “ALL THE POSTS!”
I think my fav pic is on top of the refrigerator?!? Is that a thing?? Now I have to go searching...

Oh my goodness.... a breath of fresh air...... 💕🌈🌟

WELCOME BACK INDEED!!!!

sillysassy

Ok... here's one.... Just one of my favorite things about @DarrenWalker

https://www.cuddlecomfort.com/forum/discussion/comment/75934#Comment_75934

I was laughing for at least 10 minutes. LITERALLY!!!

Mike403

@sillysassy @DarrenWalker - Weird Al! I've been to one of his concerts.

Mike403

@sillysassy - If you like Weird Al, give this one a listen. This song is freaking hilarious.

pmvines

I want to leave the site so people will be happy to see me and tell my tales when I return 😋

geoff1000

@pmvines
Sounds like a good plan. See you tomorrow.

pmvines

@geoff1000 yeah I cant stay gone that long. That might make too many people happy

Mike403

@geoff1000 @pmvines - I might disappear once the pandemic ends. This is keeping me sane right now.

littermate

@pmvines noooooooooooooo!
@geoff1000 hahaha

@pmvines: Well, I'd throw a party for your return—if you left, and if I was more of a party-throwing type. Anyway, it's nice to see you again. And you, @littermate, @Sideon, @DonLonG, @sillysassy.... Geez louise, I missed a lot of people!

@Mike403: Nice. I dunno if I'll ever own my own home, but if I do I hope I have at least as good a deal as the one you've got going.

@geoff1000: The oldest of ten kids, yeah. Behold the horrific results of "letting God plan your family"!

It's actually pretty okay from the inside. Lots of cuddles.

Mike403

@DarrenWalker - I jumped in and bought a place during the housing market crash of 2008. The economy was really poor then and people had a hard time giving a place away.

@Mike403: Gotcha. That'd do it. Hmm. Seems kind of wrong to hope for that kind of luck... but....

Mike403

@DarrenWalker - There was a time before that when banks would pretty much loan anyone money. As long as they had a pulse, they qualified for a home loan... that resulted in tons of foreclosures.

MissAdventurous

@DarrenWalker
Finally back and I'm glad. 🧐🙃💓😂

I can't pick just one response, but there are many I've enjoyed.

biancalovecraft

@DarrenWalker welcome back
I'm so sorry to hear you went through all of this. Housing is really the current american crisis, and a particularly cruel one in the current circumstances. The weirdness from the cuddle companion adds a lot of insult, considering it cut you off from your community, not to mention how "out" you are. Backwards times!
I hope your new situation is better in every way. I send love and support your way, please extend whatever portion you feel appropriate to that hog thing you keep in touch with 😜

geoff1000

I'm also struggling financially, last week I had to furlough one of my butlers.

More seriously, I think that everyone who is required to make life-changing decisions about other people, should be required to experience first-hand, the situation that they are considering putting someone else in. A variant of the adage, "Before criticising someone, walk a mile in their shoes". "Before deciding to put someone in a pair of shoes, walk a mile in them."

SuperManCuddles

@DarrenWalker Welcome Back!!! You were definitely missed! 👍🏿

chocolatey775

is darrelwalker male or female by birth?

DonLonG

@chocolatey775
Does it really matter? Who someone is, is more important than what they are. You are more than the family or class you were born into. You are more than the sum of your parts. I know exactly who @DarrenWalker is, a beautiful person that we are privileged to have experienced and lucky to have as a part of our community.

Aw, dang. Thanks, @DonLonG.

@chocolatey775: Yeah, the state of a person's private parts at birth really doesn't tell you much about them. Other than stuff you don't need to know unless you're their doctor, or their sexual partner, or something like that. Also, if you ever ARE gonna be someone's doctor/sexual partner and so you need to ask the question, you might want to take into account the fact that "male at birth" and "female at birth" aren't the only two options.

geoff1000

A person's birth certificate usually says, so we could ask that ; but it's just the strict legal definition at the time. A US President has to have been "born in America" ; but if the mother is giving birth in a plane / train / automobile crossing the border, what threshold of the delivery process triggers the "photo finish" ?

In the UK, marriages were historically only allowed with opposite genders ; then same-sex couples got civil partnerships, and eventually marriages. I think opposite genders ( by birth ) can't have civil partnerships.

sillysassy

@DonLonG COMPLETELY!!! 100% who someone is as in their SOUL!!!!! That is why I love you guys...... and that is not said lightly..... not very many people fit into that category!!

@DarrenWalker You are so completely absolutely perfectly and wonderfully correct. SPECIFICALLY IN THIS SCENARIO of platonic cuddles. Of course there are a MILLION threads about whose parts and what parts and what should or shouldn't be done about said parts...... hahahhahaha yeah..... THAT!
I love that you have the ability to succinctly express the TRUTH about something without trying to meander around all sorts of other tidbits of information. THIS is why I consider @DarrenWalker aka OG truth teller on these and most forum posts. Tell it like it IS!

(Thank you again for choosing to rejoin this fabulous little merry-go-round that is our little corner of cyberspace!!)