@Mike403 You didn't do anything wrong. I knew what you were saying. I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings, and I'm sorry if others hurt your feelings.
AGREE!!! & DITTO!!!
He was such a great guy! Why did he leave?!
He got a little overly corrected for his word choice, IMO. I've been there. When I was new it felt like I got spanked on here for something innocent. I got a little love from @DarrenWalker as I remember. I thought I'd pay that forward.
As a somewhat precise communicator, I've had to learn the hard way that not everyone is like that. Some people paint in broad strokes but they don't always mean what they say in the way it sounds. I know @Mike403 was making a point and maybe got overly poked for how he phrased it. Alas. The forum can be a love fest and it can also be a jungle.
Aww that sucks. He always seemed to be one of those voices of reason that tried to be nice. I remember him biting back for certain issues but I miss his overall positivity.
Yeah, he's dear. I hope he sees this.
Not surprised. the same group of people treat these forums like their little kingdom...say anything they don't agree with and they swarm like sharks.
Oh, the "infected with babies" comment? I thought that was funny. It reminded me of Alien, mind you, which is maybe not what you want to come to mind when you're talking about human babies—but the phrasing was, I thought, clever and unexpected, and it jostled my funny bone.
Of course, if I ever discovered there was a baby inside me I'd definitely feel like something had gone badly wrong... so I'm not objective when it comes to the "baby as infection" viewpoint. But still.
Come on back, @Mike403! We like you, or at least we don't dislike you!
@littermate In a thread discussing word choice. "I got spanked on here" 😀
My brother once remarked that a human male, is just a sperm's way of making another sperm.
We think of tadpoles as baby frogs, and caterpillars as baby butterflies ; but we can easily think of them in reverse. The mayfly spends years as a water-dwelling bug, and just one day as a sexually-mature adult.
We often use euphemisms to help with upsetting situations, such as "losing" a family member, or describing them as my "late" spouse. People who are bereaved, might say these words are offensive if used in their original sense.
@geoff1000: My dad used to say I'd be late to my own funeral. He never explained. Took me years to discover the pun. My childhood was full of puzzled wondering how the heck a corpse could manage to arrive late. "The hearse gets lost, maybe?" I considered. "The funeral director sleeps in?"
When I finally figured it out I laughed for nearly a full five minutes.
@DarrenWalker It's a joke from The Two Ronnies, where a woman refers to "My late husband" then explains, "He wss always late, so I divorced him".
My experience is that I am guaranteed to arrive late, if I phone up to confirm I will be arriving on time. It seems to prompt a motorway pile-up or similar.
If I am ever convicted of murder and sentenced to death, my last request will be a phone call. I will then tell my executioner that I will definitely be arriving on time, guaranteed, without fail, certainly. Fate will then ensure that I never arrive.
@geoff1000, you make me laugh.
@DarrenWalker 👍
"Late to my own funeral." I had never noticed the pun... 🤦♀️ Just that I'm late to everything else so why not that too? Made sense to me. ~ Lol
Also, I actually chuckled aloud at the "infected with babies" line. One of my cousins is a biologist and she refers to them that way for a number of reasons. The lighter ones I remember are they begin with a parasitic implanting, then feeding on their host there's rapid cell division and a continually invasive growth, where some react with violent morning sickness (a body's reactionary way to purge toxins). In the end they're finally ejected from the body and, in many cases, continue to feed off of their host for up to the remainder of their lives.
A dark-ish view but not inaccurate and also funny if you're into that kind of humor ~ I personally find great delight in it.
Come back to us @Mike403 ~ You're good people and I believe the majority of us fully recognize that! 🤗🤗🤗
People deactivate all the time. He prob just felt like he needed a break. Perdonsply I think we all do from time to time . I'm site hell he back soon he didn't delete just deactivated
@quixotic_life I told a young troubled friend of mine that I didn't want to go to their funeral, and they replied, "Neither do I". I think she meant more specifically "anytime soon".
A human baby is 50% of the mother's genes, so pregnancy is a step of "self" preservation. It isn't like Covid-19, or The Midwich Cuckoos ; but what about surrogate mothers ? Some are paid, which helps their own life chances, but others do it for free, like others donate a kidney. They may put a sign in their front window, "Womb to let, apply within". 😀
Parasites typically don't kill the host quickly, that's like burning down one's own house ; but many "invasive" creatures actually have a symbiotic relationship, like our gut bacteria.
Having a baby to a "good" man, is a double form of self-preservation, because it makes the man motivated to look after them, and hence the child.
A female friend asked what a man's best policy should be, in a situation where he, his partner, and their child are in danger and one will certainly die. Easy. If I save only the child, they'll be stuck with an incompetent single father and have no chance. If I save only the mother, they will never forgive me for losing the child, so our relationship is over. In either case, I suffer the permanent guilt of losing one.
A man who sacrifices himself for his family, is therefore actually acting in his own best interests. I just hope I remember that if the time comes. The trick of course is to avoid that situation ; as the computer says in "Wargames" , the only winning strategy is to not play.
@geoff1000 ~ "Parasites typically don't kill the host quickly, that's like burning down one's own house ; but many "invasive" creatures actually have a symbiotic relationship, like our gut bacteria." ~ Lol
@quixotic_life Babies are a bit like that, being pregnant can sometimes get you a seat on a crowded bus.
@pmvines He was hurt. I didn't know he deactivated. Alas.
He will hopefully behave like Arnold Schwarzenegger, who repeatedly says, "Thank you for electing me as Governor of California".
@Mike403 I miss Mike too! @geoff1000 Nice quote!
@geoff1000
@alaskaman12 I really like the running joke in "Terminator Genisys", where he keeps asking Sarah Connor ( Emilia Clarke ) if she has "mated" yet.
Does anyone want to take responsibility for @Mike403 leaving ? I have my candidate.
@geoff1000 ~ I don't think that would be helpful in bringing Mike back. He's a sweetheart who hasn't displayed any sort of finger pointing (that I've seen).
Honestly, I'm bummed about the degree to which I participated in the two threads that recently spun out. Some poor forum choices were made on my part and although I don't think I directly caused the removals or deactivation I certainly didn't help by not letting things go or at least breathing before posting.
Sorry Mike ♡♡♡
@geoff1000 Why did he deactivate?
@alaskaman12 Read the Concerts and Large Gatherings thread.
There were two other threads that spun out too, and were fully deleted. Sometimes we just push our points of view too hard on others and end up hurting them in the process.
Sorry again @geoff1000 ~ Glad we're still good after all that back and forth the other day. Eesh ~ I really am a bit extra at times... 🙇♀️ I really need to work on reining that in...
@quixotic_life I think that those two threads got deleted. I went back five pages.
@alaskaman12 ~ Yes, the "Circus on TV" (re: the debate) and the one about "Unresponsive Cuddlers" were both deleted.
edited to add/then fix The other I was referencing is the, "When do you think concerts and other large gatherings will resume?" thread started by @Mike403
🌄 ~ if outside... &... 🎫👨🎤💖👩🎤🤘🎸🥁🎶 ~ hoping for soon!
Some people can be offended / upset, by completely normal wording ; literally no statement is inoffensive to everyone. Some people will criticise behaviour ; and not always personally, but sometimes on behalf of real or theoretical people. That criticism can be heartfelt, but it may also be fabricated.
Pedantry is a form of criticism, but most statements while imprecise, are accurate enough for everyday use ; no man is truly "6 feet tall" if we mean 6 feet +/- a tolerance of 0.0000000000001 feet.
Figurative speech is a minefield, but it is the richness of our language, and helps us understand concepts ; yet as an example, this sentence is potentially offensive to anyone who has suffered directly or indirectly, from the effects of a landmine. Slipping on a banana skin is no better, and the expression emotional "hurt", is insensitive to anyone suffering physical hurt.
My understanding of @Mike403 is that he felt criticised for certain wording, and his self-confessed Neuro-Diversity, means he took that very much to heart. Imagine a small child being told that every time they sneeze, it makes millions of cold viruses homeless, and how would they feel if someone did that to them. N-Ds strive hard to fit into a group, and be considered "nice", so that comes with a heavy guilt from any transgression, whether intentional or accidental ; or as @quixotic_life put it "he's a sweetheart". I'm reminded of the strongly-religious child, who cut off his own hand ; because he had mistakenly raised it in affirmative response, to a misunderstood question, which thereby blasphemed his God.
We should always consider the sensitivities of others ; but that includes considering the sensitivities, of those we criticise for insensitivity. Sometimes it is sufficient, or best, to simply say "some people don't like that", and explain why ; rather than giving the author both barrels of a verbal attack - and I have now again been insensitive, this time to any victims of shotgun injury.
