I’m under the same boat. I’m so happy I found a job making money doing something I love. That’s the dream isn’t it?! But here’s the truth bomb. I wouldn’t do it free. I have my hubby and three little kitties to get my cuddles, although having this opportunity to make a living holding people and snuggling and nuzzling is just the bees knees lol I have always been super snuggly so if you’ve ever met me out in the wild and became my friend, hugs and tight squeezes are part and parcel with that friendship. But I wouldn’t come into a cuddling site as an enthusiast because the truth is, I don’t need it. I’d love to cuddle everyone but if I didn’t make a living from this, and cuddled for free, I’d be working a dead end job unhappy and not even having much time to offer cuddles to those outside my family and friends.
Sheena, I really appreciate your honesty. I would expect that most women that are professionals here feel similarly to you. While they may enjoy snuggling they are really here for the money. Does that make sense? Or have I taken your words out of context? Please feel free to correct me.
On the other hand do not want to work in this capacity because I want my intimate/cuddling/emotional needs to be cared for by the person that I am cuddling with. I think it’s so wonderful that we as women get to do what we want to do for ourselves. I’m here to support women and I’m so happy that you are here too.
@Importance no worries 😉 nothing youve said is out of context! I guess I myself feel a little cold and weird just saying “I do it for the money” , therefore I feel like I have to write a whole monologue describing why I do this as a career lol That is the jist of it, I just want to always make sure it doesn’t sound greedy or uncaring. I hope this came out right 😅
I can totally understand your wants and needs for cuddles. That’s also why I completely see your side in wanting a male pro. I’m sure you have a few male enthusiasts that want to cuddle you but the beauty of a pro is that all the attention and care is on you! I hope you’re able to find a cuddler suited to your needs!
@Sheena123 Thanks for that comment, that's awesome.
Thing is, I don't think it should require a "truth bomb." You do your job because you get paid to do it. I think that applies to most people in any profession. I'm not sure why that became controversial on this forum.
@CuddleMeLater I guess it’s become taboo because so many don’t like the idea of buying affection, so hearing someone say “I do this specifically for money” seems to get translated into “I don’t really care about you, just money”. Some can’t come to terms that even though it’s a job, that doesn’t take away the genuine affection and connection you make. Hmm 🤔 that’s probably why I feel compelled to say “truth bomb” and almost sound apologetic for saying what’s factual about this. I agree, it’s quite sad 😔
It's ideal for professionals to not "need" the cuddles. That's so they can provide the session the client needs instead of trying to push their own needs onto the client.
The distinction is that a good professional does not "do this work so they can get paid," they "get paid so they can do this work." We don't do this work for the money, we get money so we can do it. If that makes sense. It's very different... 😇
@ubergigglefritz makes sense to me 😉
Actually, to me, what @ubergigglefritz says doesn't completely make sense. Referring to "We don't do this work for the money, we get money so we can do it." I think it's great that she has this attitude. But I don't think all pros need to. In fact, I'm pretty sure she's the only person I've talked to who thinks of it this way.
There are plenty of cuddlers who I've had great cuddles with who definitely "do this work for the money." I don't think it makes them bad pros.
@CuddleMeLater I'm glad you've had good experiences regardless of their attitude. If I were looking for a professional for myself, that would be important for me, but you're right, different pros will be considered "good" for different people depending on what they're looking for in a professional, and that's perfectly fine. 🤷♀️😊
This is like the question of what came first, the chicken or the egg… We need the money so that we can cuddle and we cuddle for the money. But everybody likes cuddles and that is one thing we can all agree on here on Cuddle comfort.
It seems circular to me. If the professionals did not want/need the money then they would do it for free.
Either way, I want you ladies to get paid and to be paid well. I want you to get the fee that you are asking plus a generous tip and possibly gifts. I want the men to be exceptionally good to you no matter what. I think we need to protect our women above all else.
Good job, ladies 🐣🐣🐣🐣🐣🐣
I have wondered that about the professional vs personal account.
I'd like to option to go forth and cuddle someone as equals rather than carry the pressure of being a professional all the time ~ (this is me speaking as a hypothetical professional, of course 😋) Even if I didn't use it very often, knowing that I could would be a comfort to me.
My thoughts aren't quite aligned with what the OP was talking about. I mean, if you're speaking as someone who has the energy and time ( and may not need the extra cash), it might make sense to give discounted or even free cuddle sessions if you really hit it off with someone who can't afford the hourly rate.
But when you have a family you need to provide for, or a partner that you are already emotionally present for, it makes sense that you may not have a lot extra to give away. So getting paid is what really allows you to do the work.
I've really enjoyed reading this thread, thank you for your thoughts everyone.
@Importance Thank you for sharing 💛 And for linking me to this thread ~
@Importance "allosexual" just refers to a regular, non-asexual person. It's used similarly to the word "cisgender" as opposed to someone "transgender".
@ubergigglefritz yes most ace dating sites are relatively inactive, but here are a few resources for anyone interested:
Reddit: r/r4rasexual r/asexualdating
Facebook: Asexual Singles: https://www.facebook.com/groups/single.aces
Asexual Dating Sites: Asexuals.net: https://www.asexuals.net/ Asexualitic: https://www.asexualitic.com/ AceApp: https://play.google.com/store/apps/details... Miscellaneace: http://miscellaneace.asexual-aces.com/ Acebook (asexual social/dating network): https://www.ace-book.net/
Other relevant websites: AVEN (forum and info about local ace meetups): https://www.asexuality.org/en/
@Importance your logic probably follows for most pros. I'm weird I guess. 🤷♀️ The order, and which is first, is pretty straightforward for me. If I didn't need money (let's say everything is "free" in our country and I have no debt to my name), I would still see my "clients", but maybe at a lower frequency, traveling slower for sure, take special trips to new places every now and then, etc. But since I DO need money, I HAVE to charge, or else I would need to find another job/work, and thus I wouldn't have the time or energy to see my clients. So yes, I charge so I CAN do this. If I didn't charge, I would be doing something else to sustain myself and would have to stop seeing my clients.
@TouchSanctuary all those dating sites exist, their URLs work I guess, ha, but using them to meet someone might be like going to the desert to meet someone. There might be another person somewhere, but you have to scavenge across miles and miles to find them, and once you investigate, that person is actually just a dead body rotting in the sand. 😆
Unfortunately I have to agree with @ubergigglefritz about those sites. They're pretty much ghost towns in my experience. I mean, I know men complain about the lack of women here, but that's nothing compared to being on a site with a total of 2 members in a 100 mile radius in a major American city.
@CuddleMeLater 😆👍
@ubergigglefritz I recently posted on the asexual dating subreddits and connected with someone who lives in my area, which is a small city in Australia. So you never know! I do think the subreddits and Facebook groups have a much higher number of people than the asexual dating sites, but I have connected with people in my region through them. For example, when I first joined asexuals.net, I had a woman in my town contact me right away.