How well do you like the forum , or dislike it and why? 🧵

cuddles_ndreamcuddles_ndream
in General

I really like the forum very much!! & it all started as an escape ... I was here for several months or so before I realized there was one, & I notice immediately how much of an escape it was ... later on, I noticed how I was able to connect with others (through humor / silliness/ & laughter primarily but amongst other things I value) not for everyone but it is to be expected in anything else ... & finally, Ive come to the realization of how necessary & important the forum is ....

Pics are one thing / A well written profile & bio is another (profiles being my personal fav) but the threads are by far (in my eyes) the most important asset ... we get to really see & learn people’s personalities & ways through their comments / replies & interaction on the threads ... we don’t need pics or bios to learn each other, or for others to learn us, the threads are telling ... (profiles still being very important as the majority of the site is no where near the threads or at the very least participate) but I can say that through the threads there are people who I would have never thought or considered as a possible/potential cuddle partner , & I realize how sweet they are & I really would want to now, & others I soo would have loved to be a potential cuddle partner, but I know now I wouldn’t consider it in the least, & I’m very sure people feel the same about me in either case ...

Also, there are members here who could tell me any day that they are in my area, & I’ll stop what I’m doing or make time to have a beer or bite with them no questions asked (did not expect this either) and this is because I have a really good sense & understanding of who they truly are & where their heart is from just learning their personalities through the threads. these are my reasons why I like the forum very well, how about you? : )

Comments

  • Sheena123Sheena123

    I love how vastly different every thread is so there’s always something for everyone 😊 keeps me busy here and there when I’ve nothing to do.

  • cuddlerforu24cuddlerforu24

    I noticed perhaps many have there is an audience that’s wants to read or hear what they want to read , and there’s at least one or more phycophants picked up on that and consistently deliver such topic

  • [Deleted User]DarrenWalker (deleted user)

    The forums are a good place to make friends. You get to know people here, I think. Weird to think I've been here almost six years now. I've met people who like reading the things I write; I've met people who hate reading the things I write. It's fun!

  • CuddleDuncanCuddleDuncan Mod

    I don't like this forum, no.

    When I arrived, I stayed for three reasons. Partly because I was in the mood for a forum. Partly because I want to do my bit for bringing cuddling into the light. And partly because I was fascinated by this place. There was so much here that I had only read about, and never experienced. And as you might have noticed, I became slightly obsessive for a while.

    But first, the good bits. I do laugh sometimes, or feel encouraged. There are some really great people here. CC as a whole has been good to me - I have had met some wonderful cuddle professionals, and I have found equally wonderful cuddle buddies. (Finding female cuddle buddes wasn't difficult for me in the end. It wasn't easy - you have to put the effort in and be patient - but contrary to the myth it wasn't that hard. I am fortunate to live in a place with cuddlers. Well, it wasn't fortune, I live in one of the world's leading global cities for a reason.) I have found online friends through this forum, so I'm very glad indeed that I came.

    But so much bad stuff! It's breathtaking. It was the misogyny that attracted me first. I knew it existed but I'd never seen it, not like this. It took me a while to work out why there are any women here at all, but the truth is that the myth that women find it easier than men to find cuddle buddies is just that - a myth. Women find it just as hard as men, although the obstacles are different.

    The misogyny is so intricate too: sometimes blatant, sometimes so insidious you almost miss it. Sometimes deliberate, sometimes ... well sometimes I think that some of the misogynist types truly believe that they aren't. It's hard to tell without knowing them in another context. In the early days I used to stare at a thread sometimes after such a comment..... surely somebody will say something! Surely they'll get banned for that! But no, nothing happened at all. Wildly different from anything I've ever known! I'm happy to say there is a little less of it now than when I became active.

    And then there's the general nastiness. I know a little about forums - I was a forum Admin in a previous life - and I've just never seen it on a properly moderated forum like this. I'm absolutely not having a go at the mods: it's a property of the place as a whole. The mods here do a fine job within the context of the job they are trying to do.

    And then - just when you thought it couldn't get any better - there are people who believe things that just aren't believable. Again, something I've only seen on the news. The unshakeable belief in something which is just .... catastophically impossible. It's extraordinary.

    Yep, all human life is here. And I'm nothing if not fascinated by human life.

    It's not because I've lived a narrow life. I've been friendly with people of all social classes, I've been around the world, I've been comfortable and I've been poor. I think much of this is because it's such an American forum. Others I've been involved with have always had plenty of Americans, but were much more international. Here there are only a handful of active posters from elsewhere.

    Don't get me wrong, I love America. I've had much to do with the place and the people thoughout my life. I'm actively contemplating a trip to meet all my new American cuddle friends, once the you-know-what is toast. But, even though I once had a brilliant day in Devil's Lake North Dakota, much of my experience has been of the highly educated, international-travelling, NYC/Bay area type. Perhaps 90% of the hundreds if not thousands of Americans I've met properly in person would have voted Biden without thinking about it, including most of the ones who voted Bush, Bush or Reagan. It's been an education actually to encounter some people who think the 19th Amendment was either a mistake or a plot to control the masses.

  • [Deleted User]squeakytoy (deleted user)

    @CuddleDuncan Wow. Agreed on pretty much all points. Thanks especially for the paragraphs addressing misogyny in the forums, you're spot on. It's really refreshing to be reminded that some of the guys here are aware of this too. There's only so much of it I'm willing to address. It gets exhausting.

    Anyway, I'm 50-50 on liking the forums. It really depends on the thread for me. I mostly like the forums because I've met some awesome people through them - it's nice to have made some online/IRL friends through here during quarantine :)

  • cuddles_ndreamcuddles_ndream

    Absolutely @Sheena123 : )

    I've met people who like reading the things I write; I've met people who hate reading the things I write. It's fun! - @DarrenWalker lol 😂

    @CuddleDuncan we've definitely have had our clashing moments but I definitely know where your heart is, I’m a comment away if you’re ever in the city! 🍻

    I've met some awesome people through them - it's nice to have made some online/IRL friends through here during quarantine - @squeakytoy most definitely!

  • CuddleDuncanCuddleDuncan Mod

    @introvme likewise - yes we will have a beer next time I'm in NYC.

  • quixotic_lifequixotic_life

    @CuddleDuncan ~ Yep! On nearly all of that (all but the last two paragraphs because I haven't traveled the world and I don't love america.) Well assessed and phrased sir!
    [a tip of the hat and a nod to you]

    Additionally...

    I like the forums for a lot of reasons, mainly:

    • It's often a reality/real world issues pause

    • I get challenged by differing points of view, debates and arguments

    • I've made some great connections here and a few have turned into cuddle opportunities

    What I don't like is when my real world issues with peopling are reflected/highlighted here:

    • Being misunderstood, getting judged, being dismissed

    • My sense of humor not landing well (or at all)

    • That I'm too sensitive and easily hurt by those I hardly know and whose opinions of me shouldn't matter but do.

    TLDR
    Like ~ 73.3%
    Dislike ~ 23.3%
    Ambivalent ~ 3.3%
    Unsure ~ .1%

  • FlyingToasterFlyingToaster

    As with most forums, there are things I like and things I dislike about it. Things I like:

    • Making connections with people
    • Positive discussions and humorous posts
    • Discussions about improving the site & situations to make for better experiences in meeting people
    • Moderators that do a good job of responding to negative posts, to keep that kind of thing to a minimum

    Things I dislike:

    • Arguments, personal attacks, and general drama that sometimes happen
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