@cuddlewho that’s probably when you can start thinking of the negative review .
I would expect a pro to send me a contract to sign just like any other professional would do. As much fun as cuddling is, when money is involved people need to take it seriously. Even when money is not involved it is not OK to flake.
@nurturingman The instant contracts come into play I am out. Besides, you are kind of under contract with the site TOS. I have a physical therapist that I occasionally see (fell off a roof a few years ago) and I only sign insurance papers. Too many options out there to sign a contract. This place would see a significant drop in traffic in my opinion if you have contracts involved. Now you are bringing lawyers into a private sphere. This is one more reason why we can’t have nice things.
As far as I understand, pros who list here are free to determine their business practices — how much to charge, whether to charge a down payment — as long as it’s within the TOS, but the TOS does not protect the professional’s income.
No shows can be reported and banned so yes TOS does protect them. I would definitely be sticking to enthusiasts or people who I now have their number if it starts turning into Hertz Rent-a-Cuddle around here.
Karma is viable, @CuddleWho . Pros and enthusiasts who are timewasters and no-shows ARE banned all the time.
Leave negative karma for no-shows so others can make informed decisions. If the professional does retaliate in any way by means of negative karma, put in a ticket with the admin for removal. Since November (and becoming an admin), I'm aware of this happening 3 times (removal of unjustified karma).
What do you mean by “Hertz Rent-a-Cuddle,” @FunCartel ?
I looked up the Client Service Agreement and found this about payment and cancellations:
Payment The Cuddler will ask for payment from the Client for the Full Session Price as previously agreed between the Cuddler and Client on the website. Payment for each session is due before the session or at the very start of one. Cancellation Policy If you cancel within 12 hours of the appointment we ask that you pay half of the session price. This is to compensate the Cuddler for lost business as it's unlikely they would be able to find another client for that scheduled period at such short notice. In the case of a Cuddler cancelling within 12 hours, they are expected to offer you compensation in the form of a discount for your next session with them. If you cancel within 24 hours and your session includes a rental space arrangement prepaid for by the Cuddler, we ask you pay the full price of that rental cost. This is to compensate the Cuddler for what would otherwise be a tangible financial loss. In the reverse scenario we also ask the Cuddler compensate you in the same way.
The Cuddler will ask for payment from the Client for the Full Session Price as previously agreed between the Cuddler and Client on the website. Payment for each session is due before the session or at the very start of one.
If you cancel within 12 hours of the appointment we ask that you pay half of the session price. This is to compensate the Cuddler for lost business as it's unlikely they would be able to find another client for that scheduled period at such short notice. In the case of a Cuddler cancelling within 12 hours, they are expected to offer you compensation in the form of a discount for your next session with them. If you cancel within 24 hours and your session includes a rental space arrangement prepaid for by the Cuddler, we ask you pay the full price of that rental cost. This is to compensate the Cuddler for what would otherwise be a tangible financial loss. In the reverse scenario we also ask the Cuddler compensate you in the same way.
Maybe @Sideon can clarify, but the "we ask that" language sounds like it only protects pros in so far as violators will be banned; it doesn't sound like a contract stipulation a pro could take to court to sue someone for breach of contract (i.e., lack of payment). Maybe I'm sounding harsh, but please understand my perspective: I've worked for many years as a freelancer [i.e., independent contractor], constantly engaging with new clients. I work with an agency who handles contracts and sues clients for lack of payment. The agency takes a big cut of what they charge the client, but it's worth it to me not to have to deal with contracts and billing all the time, and to be paid regardless of whether the clients pay. However, I do occasionally contract on my own, and true to the verb contract, I require a signed contract that stipulates terms of payment. I have never had to take someone to court for lack of payment, but I have had to hound people for it. I don't see why a professional cuddler should be expected to be "cuddly" in every sense of the word. I believe the words professional and cuddler should carry equal weight. I've only ever hired one pro, mostly just to see how a pro worked, and she didn't require me to sign a contract, but I wouldn't have been put off if she had; in fact, I might have had even trust in her. A professional is a professional. Business is business.
[EDIT] I show up to interpret appointments all the time that have been cancelled, rescheduled, or to which the clients do not show up. I get paid for every job I show up to in good faith. If I were not paid when people "flake" or cancel in under 24 hours (or 48 hours, depending on the contract), I could not make a living as an interpreter. I can't imagine being a professional cuddler and not getting paid if a client didn't show up. Now, as for clients who book pros, such as the OP, I hope they all do report the pros who flake, because that is intolerable.
@nirturimngman most all the pro s want to be anonymous, so , going to small claims court for hotel @ 79.95 , half the session fee let’s Say two hours @ 100.00 so that’s 100 so Gran totel it’s 179.95. Is it worth it ? No . I can’t imagine the pro cuddler giving the clerk of court their username as plaintiff and the clients username as defendant.
@nurturingman The pros are allowed to ask for a deposit themselves and payment is due when they walk through the door. Anything beyond that—contracts, etc.—is something I will walk on. The reference to Hertz is if you ever rent a car there are ten thousand pieces of paper that will spit out whenever you rent a car. Luckily I make upwards of 100 rentals a year for work so I do not have to endure it as much. I like this site but this is not an agency. If it turns into one I would walk and not think twice. Many others would as well. It is already hard enough finding worthwhile cuddlers, introducing more complications makes it a headache. I honor my appointments and I communicate. Why should I sign a contract? Two hours of cuddling does not rise to the level of paperwork and litigation, and I would survive without the site.
In addition, how would you enforce said contract? You want a drivers license? Credit card? A lot of people are not down for that. Trace them online? A lot of people use VPNs. One can easily delete their account and erase their footsteps. I understand a pro’s need to protect their income but there are ways to do it without contracts. This is one of those be careful what you wish for type of ideas.No sweat off my back if you do it because I know plenty of pros that I can call and some are now independent because they built up a clientele. I also know enthusiasts. I have plenty of people to fill the gap. The same could be said for a lot of long term clients here. But I do not think you want to go the contract route for this.
To be honest I didn't know that it was common for pros to do that. I always aim to arrive about 5-7 minutes early to my sessions. I've even caught them unprepared before! One was like I usually expect people on time and I'm usually there first so you beat me this time lol. But anyway sorry for your experience but honestly not all pros are like that.
@Catloaf I may have to consider booking an appointment with you. You said you" "can count on upwards of 5 hands..." If you have upwards of 5 hands to count on, that's a cuddle I need in my life!!
@Amortentia You are like most pros. 95% are on time or communicate if they are stuck in traffic. There is a small contingent out there that do not and normally they haven’t been in the game very long, nor will they be if they continue that behavior. I do appreciate an on-time cuddler though.
@FunCartel Thanks. I also expect more from people who are listed as pros. Like they are running a business so they need to focus on client satisfaction here. Sure with driving to meet a client something can still arise like an accident on a road or a flat tire or whatever but then a pro is responsible to communicate that and help fix it. A no show and no communication just isn't pro material for me personally.
@Amortentia
@FunCartel
You are like most pros. 95% are on time or communicate if they are stuck in traffic.
I'm glad that's been your experience, but I have to honestly say, it is not consistent with my experience. In my experience it's fairly difficult to find a reliable pro.
@FunCartel I'll take that into consideration, since at this point I'm only thinking of becoming a pro. From the way you have described your experience and others have described theirs, you have had a lot more luck than most. @cuddlerforu24 makes a good point about how much is worth taking someone to court for, and I suppose one must consider client confidentiality when naming someone as a respondent in a civil suit. However, I feel like since this is not prostitution, it should be above board, not under the table. I'm used to dealing in real names, not usernames, and dealing in traceable payments, not cash. I can understand why some people might want to keep it on the down-low, but I guess I feel as much repulsion to covertness and cash as @FunCartel feels to contracts and credit cards.
BTW, I love the clarity of language used by both @CuddleWho and @CuddleDuncan, and I appreciate the perspectives of the pros who have chimed in as well. Also, @creedhands , LOL!
@nurturingman I resent you implying that I support covertness. I travel a ton for work and use credit cards all the time. But I also use them with corporations who use a crap ton of security to protect that. CC is a small operation and I do not care to put my info out there to them for that reason. I already have to take precautions in airports and I have had to replace my credit card three times in the last eight years because someone got my info at a gas station or on-line. Paranoid? Yes for good reason. And someone else made the point that you will not be popular with small claims court if you are in there constantly for $100 or $200 claims every week because someone no showed.
Furthermore, I never implied this to be like prostitution, so just because I disagree with you do not think you can correlate the two which you are clearly doing when you tag me. I would say at this point that while I despise covertness (which many pros take deposits through cash apps and PayPal) financial covertness is sometimes desired for reasons that may not fit your world view. I guarantee you I am not alone. What next? Contracts from the 13 yo kid who cuts my grass? I do not sign a contract when I call a plumber. Nor when I call an electrician. You see where I am going with this. It is easy to pontificate when you are not the one running a website or an agency.
@CuddleWho where are you located? I would gladly cuddle and I am never a no show or cancel. If you live near me, i will make this happen. I am willing to drive, if it isn’t to very far. Don’t delete your account. I really do understand your frustration, but maybe by posting this, you have reached other pros that can step in and make themselves known to you.
@Tranquilescape thanks for that. Unfortunately I’m in Colorado, so pretty far from you.
@CuddleWho Have you reached out to enthusiasts?
@FunCartel I can't assume that you are repulsed by contracts and credit cards in general. I gathered that you were repulsed by them when it comes to cuddling. I am not suggesting that CuddleComfort should accept credit card payments for booking sessions. I just meant I would respect a pro who only accepted electronic payments, and it makes me a bit suspicious when businesses are cash-only. My comment about cuddling not being prostitution was in response to what @cuddlerforu24 said about "most all the pro s want[ing] to be anonymous." Perhaps the word prostitution was too inflammatory. I just mean it's not an illicit business, so it needn't be conducted as such. Unfortunately, though, I guess some prospective employers not familiar with professional cuddling might view it as akin to prostitution, so I can understand why pros might not exactly want it on their résumé. I know this CuddleComfort website is not an agency. That's why the pros and enthusiasts who use it have to be so careful.
follow up: she actually texted me today, profusely apologized, and said she had marked the wrong day on her calendar.
So it sounds like this really was a simple mistake and my rant wasn’t warranted. As I said to @pmvines, there’s a first time for everything.
@CuddleWho I haven't participated in this discussion at all yet, but I just wanted to say that I'm so glad this story had a happy resolution
That's why I give it time before reacting with things like this . Glad things are ok
I think the flakiness you speak of is a result of cuddling strangers not the site. People can be apprehensive about this, and obviously some pros are apprehensive as well. It’s not an easy thing I’d assume.
@BashfulLoner Nailed it. It is a product of the individuals and not the site.
@CuddleWho so glad she contacted you back. If you are ever in the Atlanta GA area, I would be honored to cuddle with you!!!
I’ve had people no show and sometimes not communicate to me that they would not and well it happens. What can you do, to me it’s not the end of the world. Is it an inconvenience? Sure. But you can’t force someone to do something they don’t want to or fail to do. You move on and find someone else who is more reliable.
Honestly, though, that's way too many times you have been stood up. You need at least one decent regular cuddler. I have 3 regular repeat in person cuddlers and I'm thrilled with finding them. You need a sparkle of luck. Don't give up. People also always join this site. There will be someone near you eventually who will hopefully be serious about what they're on this site for. Best of luck to you!
@bekah_cuddles I would really suggest making them pay at least a few hours before the session. I always require my cuddlers to do that and then they seem more serious about it happening. No client has yet done a cancel on me last minute or even within 24 hours of paying if they paid at least a day in advance. I even had one pay at least a week in advance which worried me but luckily I made every session and never needed to pay back lol. My only last minute cancel ever was someone who lived 10 minutes away and he contacted me in the morning to meet at night and was going to pay when it got closer to the session time. But then he was not feeling well and got sent home early from work and then said he needed to cancel and do a reschedule. Since he's a repeat client I didn't mind because that was a rare thing and he did it before having me leave and even apologized for not feeling well lol. But you'll probably see more people show up if you make them pay first! Just an idea to try if you'd like
@nurturingman I don't believe @FunCartel is relying on luck, when relating better stats for responses, and meetings.
@FunCartel is in the forums often, and you get a sense of the person behind the name. This negates apprehension about meeting a stranger, so obviously, less no shows by someone getting spooked. Also, a very clear, concise communicator.
@pmvines is also someone with lots of great karma, lots of successful cuddles, and really good communication style.
Additionally, neither feel entitled to a response or reply, from anyone, nor take it personally if they are ignored. In short, right up front, they make it clear that it is safe, to set limits, with them, and have these limits respected.
Similarly, if someone's first post here is to complain about the lack of response they get, or reject helpful hints, offered to them, I will actually go to their profile and pre-emptively block them, because they don't feel safe.