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I_am_Polylover · June 2017

@Frankincense That is a great idea! I think you should repost it on the Criticism of this site... thread.
♥Jim

June 2017

That is a great idea Franincense.

snuggle554321 · June 2017

Something that I would like to mention is that many of the gentleman that I contact don't respond either. I reach out first because some people are afraid of rejection. If I contact them first it helps take care of that. However, most of the gentleman that I contact never respond. I don't take it as an insult. They have their reasons. I simply reach out and if they want to talk then that's fantastic! But if they don't respond I never assume that it's because there's something wrong with me or my profile. I just open the door and if they walk through it then that's great! If they don't that's fine too. But I don't think ANYBODY should assume that it's because there's something wrong with them. I hope this helps! HUGE HUG!!!!

Atreides · June 2017

Potential clients do read the forums. That may be why they avoid people.

June 2017

As for me, I'll acknowledge someone visited my page, whether they're male or female. I may or may not get a reply back.

Why do women not reply? So many possible reasons.

I've coached a couple of men on ways to get better responses from women. In no particular order, they are:

1. Do not ask for a cuddle session right off the bat. Example of what NOT to say: "Hey, baby, when can we cuddle?" That is a complete message. (REALLY?!)

2. Give at least your first name in your first message--or, minimally, in your second.

3. Don't expect a cuddle session tomorrow. Get to know your potential cuddle partner (this includes professional cuddlers--everyone has a choice, here).

4. DO NOT ask for fetish-type activities, ever. Wrestling comes to mind. Doesn't sound "cuddly" to me...let's stick to the purpose of the site, shall we?

5. Have your profile filled out. Something short, sweet, and sincere, is fine! The combination of no photo, no bio, and only five or six fields filled out generally repels a potential cuddler. If you don't want a photo posted, fine, but offer to email a photo before any decisions are made.

Still, you may not get any replies and you will just have to deal. But at least you know you have done your best.

Hope this helped!

Mark · June 2017

For what it's worth, I think it's fine not to reply. I think too many people face this type or mild rejection by either responding in an insulting manner or pressuring for a reason. The latter while innocent enough often ends up turning into a drawn out conversation which is a waste of time for the uninterested party. This is just my perception so could be completely wrong.

June 2017

Mark while I don't care too much about no reply. I do see so many inactive profiles which makes sorting through who to message difficult. I had one not reply for a few weeks saying she was out if the country. Then I messaged back to see she again hadn't responded. Don't think she came back to the site. Inactive users I think are a problem. May require a user to have to login every so often or their profile is archived and needs reactivated.

Mark · June 2017

Sorry if I'm misunderstanding but if you look the 'Last Online' on a profile, doesn't that help give you some expectation?

If I see a member hasn't been online for 6 months I wouldn't have much hope for a reply. If I send a message and a few days later still see the same 'Last Online', I would not need to wonder about getting a reply.

June 2017

My point is that in doing a search everyone shows up. Maybe add a search item that only brings up users who have logged in in the week or month.

Mark · June 2017

I appreciate your point that it would be useful to have an additional search filter for this.

For now the algorithm by default should prioritise by those last online within the distance filter you set. So you can at least know that as you scroll further down, you are seeing people who are less active.

Morpheus · June 2017

The last pro I had a session with opened up her message box for me and showed me several of the rude messages that she gets. The percentage of disrespectful messages was far higher than polite ones. The girl was very sweet and we had a great session, made me sad to think she gets spoken to that was.

PotatoHead · June 2017

@xdriver60 - I'm sorry to have read what you wrote and for the lack of common courtesy that you have endured but at the same time, I'm glad you brought this topic to light.

For a website that is lays upon human comfort and compassion as it's very foundation, it's terrible to be treated with such disrespect or simply ignored.

If a person can't even receive a simple reply from a pro or non pro, it certainly makes me wonder just how much sensitivity people actually possess.

The truth is, I don't believe many people are actually equipped for this type of benefit or service if you will but just don't know it or realize it and don't care.

This is one of many reasons why I don't reach out first. Rejection or being ignore is a horrible feeling, especially when it happens on a site such as this. I'd rather cuddle a rock.

Quite sad that people can't just be polite and take a minute out to respond. Please remember, a no reply is actually a reply and it speaks volumes.

In closing, I read a few more posts and I'm sorry to hear some of the ladies have been mistreated. You don't need nor deserve that and it's usually the sweet ones who are verbally abused. Please, never let a few rude individuals change who you are.

PotatoHead · June 2017

@starlight - You are definitely an exception and a positive role model for all. You're the epitome of a lady, and I can never thank you enough. We need more women just like you to grace this site. I only wish we lived closer.

June 2017

Thanks, @lotsofcuddles, firstly for acknowledging that I even posted, and secondly for the fine compliment.

I'm glad to help, and you're a gentleman. If you were here, you'd certainly be a client of mine!

PotatoHead · June 2017

@starlight - Thank you so much and I would be honored.

@quietman775 - Your posts were right on target, thank you.

Karyn · June 2017

@xdriver60 I'm sorry to hear of your difficulty in getting a response. I visited your profile and I loved it! You present yourself as so sweet and very down to earth. We even have a couple things in common

Even though I am a pro, for what it's worth I'd totally have mutual cuddle with you if I were closer. I love hearing stories I feel like it would be so much fun.

PotatoHead · June 2017

@xdriver60 - I wish to thank you for your service to our great country Sir. Also love your GSD. I have two myself.

@Karyn - I just want to say thank you for reaching out and posting. You're both kind and sincere. It's refreshing to see such sweet woman acknowledge others within forums. Please believe me, you make a difference. ❤️

June 2017

Thank you folks for commenting. I havent been to much into looking here lately. My area seems to not have a lot of intrest in this activity. There are very few cuddlers and almost all of them have profiles that are very old and havent been looked at. I was even blocked by one person and I have no idea why. I sent a note saying that too bad she wasnt closer and maybe she could take a look at my profile. She was one of the people that never replied and now Im blocked I dont know what to think about that. Thank you for the kind word Potatohead. Thank you Karyn for the friend request. I appreciate that. I feel that there just isnt a market in this area. Not much can be done about that I suppose. Again thanks for the kind words and encouragement. Im just not used to todays "all about me society" I guess. I do respond to any and all messages though. It might take a day or so but I will always return a note. I am going to take one posters advice and not make first contact anymore. If some one wants to chat or message me or is interested, just send a note. Thanks again and have a most wonderful day/ evening

PotatoHead · June 2017

@xdriver60 - The pleasure was all mine and in return, I wish to thank you. I'm not in tune with the "all about me" type of society either but then again, we come from a much different generation and one in which I am proud to be a part of.

It's heartbreaking to hear that a "cuddler" would block you due to the fact that you simply reached out to her. It certainly makes me wonder why that type of woman would even be on such a site.

This is where professionals come into play. Since they are paid for a session by a client, it's certainly good business to be sweet, kind and sincere in order to keep the client happy and returning, opposed to the client bringing their business to another professional.

Deep down inside, I know I will never meet a non professional here and truth be told, many of the women are simply to young to understand their true nurturing potential. I could be incorrect but I believe they simply cannot comprehend the emotional impact of what this entails.

In my opinion, that woman did you a favor. Just look at the difference between her and Karyn. Now to me, Karyn is what a true cuddler should be and she was even kind enough to chime in with beautifully spoken words that made a difference.

So please hang in there. We are living in much different times. A time in life that often leaves me questioning just what happened. When we were younger, there was no internet and certainly nothing that even resembled a site such as this.

Hugs and affection came from friends, family and through a relationship, certainly not from a stranger. Yes, it's all new to me as well and I too am trying to make my way around many obstacles.

Hang in there, you're not alone. Personally, I don't reach out to any non professionals for the same reasons you just experienced. I don't feel like being ignored or blocked just for saying hello by some shallow woman. I overlook the non professionals altogether and most likely, always will. One woman will change everything, one always does and she's out there.

I_am_Polylover · June 2017

You might have better luck connecting with a non-paid cuddler by going to a cuddle party. I imagine they feel safer in a group environment.
♥Jim

June 2017

@Potatohead. Thanks. Yea deep inside I also know there will not be any non pro cuddles from this site or any other one for that matter. There will also never be any paid cuddles. I simply do not any money for that. Not at 60 or 80 an hour. Plus this area is completily lacking pros or non pros. There is nothing for pros in the 80 miles range and Im not traveling any farther than that. The money trouble comes up with travel plus my disabilities really dont like me traveling very far. I was impressed by Karyn reaching out like that. The sign of a true healer and compassinate person. I am pretty sure the lady that blocked me did so because of my no reply post. I was referring to her and a couple others. She blocked me within a couple days of that post being posted. Kinda vindictive I feel. I never used her name or even came close to iding her. Thats too bad that people feel they need to be like that. I hope you the best dear lady that blocked me. I would never contact you for a cuddle and I should leave negitve karma but you have me blocked and Im just not that way. It is your loss, Im a pretty nice guy.
@Poly. There is no intrest in this area for any kind of cuddeling pro non pro or parties. I have looked on CL and here and it just doesnt exist. The biggest problem is from what Ive seen folks around here dont go for this mostly because the majority of people see it as a front for prostitution. Its all pretty sad ya know, that people can be that closed minded.
Ill probably stay active on this site for a short time yet but Ill leave soon enough. Theres no intrest in my area so whats the point in staying? Im not being negitive either, just realistic. Anyone can can check too. Just look at whats there for a 80 mile radius of my location. I dont hide where I am. Have a great day all. Thanks for the comments and kind words.

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