I'm holding a cooking competition, for the best menu as described below. The prize is a million dollars worth of Strontium 88, delivered by naked virgins standing on magnificent white horses (also virgins ...... well you can't be too careful).
Create a complete breakfast menu of two courses, which may be served French or Russian style.
The word "course" may be interpreted liberally. Creating the menu must be within the skills and equipment of a good home cook. Serves as many as makes the recipe convenient. Preparation of something the night before is allowed, but excessive preparation time overall is discouraged. Overnight slow cooking is permitted: table theatricals are not. You may enter as many times as you like.
Ingredients list.
This list will be very strictly enforced. Any combination of ingredients is acceptable. Requests for additional items will be considered, but only one per menu. If there is a clamour for a particular thing I may add it to the list.
Water, salt, pepper
Sugar in all its forms (but ca' canny as we say in Scotland)
Herbs, Ginger, Spices excluding chilli
Yeast
Vinegar
Oil (olive, rapeseed, sunflower, etc)
Tea, coffee, fruit and herbal infusions, cocoa
Booze
Fruit, nuts, seeds, flowers
Tomatoes, mushrooms, beans & pulses, laverbread, asparagus, potatoes
Grains (e.g. wheat, oats, barley, spelt, etc.)
Milk in all its forms (butter, cheese, yogurt, etc)
Eggs of birds
Preserved meat (e.g. bacon, ham)
Preserved fish (e.g. smoked, dried)
The sausage family
Excluded: fresh meat or fish; garlic; anything you can't buy in a large supermarket;
Marks will be awarded for deliciousness, simplicity, originality, seasonality, and suitability for breakfast.
Good luck! (and thank you)