Hello person reading this. I hope you’re doing well. I was just wondering how you found your cuddle buddy. I’ve messaged everyone in my area but I haven’t gotten a single response. Any advice?
Hello Earthling, can you tell us a little bit of what you normally say in your messages? Sometimes people can come across unintentionally as creepy just by a slight miswording or tone in your introduction. I am sure you will get plenty of help with more information.
Ok, I think you need to rewrite your profile as well. It is too negative. I understand you are drained right now, but your one sentence about being drained conveys that. If they want to know more about it you can chat over a cuddle or through private chats. Put something positive or descriptive in your profile—what are your hopes? What pleases you? How will cuddling help you and make you happy? And when you say you are stopping to hiring a pro it demeans them as well as yourself. Does this make sense?
Hey, welcome. I can't get into it too much now. Though like @FunCartel said, hopefully you'll get help with time.
Brief tips: Patience, patience, and a ton more of it. Says you joined Aug. 2021... you're gonna need a ton of patience.
Improve your photo. Consider changing your username, kinda feels like you snuggle and 420 simultaneously*, just me? Probably not. Though do leave the fact that you smoke up, just not state it as in your face type of way.
That's all I got for now.
Welp*... nevermind, just read your profile says ""I like to cuddle while Smoking weed". I don't know about that...
If only you lived closer, I’d cuddle with ya!
Smoking is a HUGE turn off for me. I would never cuddle with a woman who smokes. My guess is that is a turn off for a lot of women.
Have you only contacted enthusiasts or pros as well?
I disagree on the 420 issue. It is on my profile and you would not believe how many ladies DO like 420 and I always have it if they want some. In addition many just don’t care either way. If I miss out on someone who is militant against it, so be it…it is somewhat a free country.
With that being said, if you really want to cuddle someone and they prefer to not be around it I consider it gone. I also keep mouthwash handy afterwards if they say they are fine with it but don’t indulge themselves. And 420 can be vaped as well. There is someone for everyone to cuddle. There are compromises to be had. You might have to sacrifice a behavior or trait to get what you need. If you are not willing to compromise then consider that you are not compatible to be in close quarters. I do 420 but I can’t tolerate cigarettes; but a cig smoker may not tolerate me. Things flow both ways.
CC = Communication and Compromise
@elpasocuddler I wouldn't say for a lot. *Though actively smoking (and at that one that alters the mind the way marijuana does) while cuddling, I can see it reducing his chances drastically. There are mostly the:
"Let's smoke together * while cuddling *." Not sure how common they are especially for marijuana.
"The oh no, it is a dealbreaker for me."
"The I'd request you at least don't smoke for an hour or so before our cuddle and that you don't have strong smell of it."
Or the ones who accept certain types or frequencies, eg. social smokers.
He may have been an outlier. Though I had a conversation with a smoker who said he wouldn't be with smokers in certain contexts, because he's trying to quit. And that being in such company can make it harder for him.
@FunCartel
Recreation use of marijuana is illegal in Missouri. I wouldn't advertise doing illegal activities.
All I'm saying is that many people find smoking disgusting and gross. If you like it, then do it, but just be warned that many people are turned off by it.
I posted a poll out of curiosity to see how others feel: https://www.cuddlecomfort.com/forum/discussion/11591/would-you-cuddle-with-a-smoker#latest
@Lovelight I agree. It appears he is saying that he will only cuddle if he smokes as he cuddles. I would leave 420 out of it. I do—I just ask ahead of time what their feelings are about it. If they don’t like it I don’t do it. Just had one out of all the ladies who agreed to cuddle who was militant. I met with someone else—no biggie. I would want a smoker or drinker to ask my feelings on those; it comes with the territory.
People who don't like smoking are not militant people. They just think it's nasty and gross. Plus, it's illegal in many places (like where you live).
Currently, the poll shows that 85.71% of people would not cuddle with a smoker.
"pay a stranger to help ease the pain and stress."
I think that's a turn off as well and it puts a lot of pressure on women.
@elpasocuddler If someone goes beyond saying they don’t like it and starts belittling then they are militant. You can’t say that all nonsmokers are not militant—that is a gross oversimplification of any group. There are all sorts in any group.
"You can’t say that all nonsmokers are not militant"
I never said that.
People who don't like smoking are not militant people.
Uh come again….those are your words.
And why should I care about a poll? I have been having great success doing me. Plus 95% or more of CC doesn’t even participate in the forums.
don’t know if you’re only reaching out to enthusiasts , but if you’re open to pros , & or enthusiasts without pics, you will have a better response.
@FunCartel "If someone goes beyond saying they don’t like it and starts belittling then they are militant. You can’t say that all nonsmokers are not militant—that is a gross oversimplification of any group. There are all sorts in any group."
I agree.
I said "People who don't like smoking are not militant people."
I did not say: "all nonsmokers are not militant".
Please stop arguing.
@elpasocuddler Splitting hairs here. Stop the baiting and carry on with your life.
I already reported your posts. You are the person that continues to be baiting me and putting words in my mouth. Please stop it.
@elpasocuddler Bruh, I'd suggest letting it go.
@FunCartel didn't say "people who don't like smoking are militant" either. He simply spoke of his specific personal experiences. So responding him with "People who don't like smoking are not militant people. They just think it's nasty and gross. Plus, it's illegal in many places (like where you live)." Followed by "I said "People who don't like smoking are not militant people."
I did not say: "all nonsmokers are not militant"."
muddies the waters at best.
"Drained mentally and physically."
I would not want to cuddle with a woman who is drained mentally and physically. I wish you luck, but I think you have to change your entire profile.
I would be fine to cuddle someone who feels drained as long as they meet my criterias and I feel I am gaining too somehow. Or feel all good and able to just help someone: not just getting used by the person then when all better he disappears into the who knows where. Leaving me feeling used. So @420Snuggler don't feel so discouraged by some people's comments. Chin up, stick around and with time hopefully you'll find good connections.
If anyone has a good way around, or through, the whole, "I don't want anyone that needs anything", mentality that seems to have taken root in our "culture", please let me know...
@CharlesThePoet
I'm a little confused. What exactly is your question?
@CharlesThePoet Okay!!
Edit: 🫂
@elpasocuddler
On some level, every enthusiast and client on this site is in need of human contact, of cuddling, of attention, comfort, and affirmation.
But our culture abhors the admitting of need, perceiving it as weakness, or a flaw somehow.
And yet, with the possible (and questionable) exceptions of professionals, everyone on this website was compelled here by those needs. Compelled to admit those things when making a profile.
But, don't actually acknowledge those utterly normal human needs in your profile: You have to be positive.
It is one of the reasons that people can sometimes treat this like a dating site, because in that way it IS one.
Show a good photo or three to look normal, attractive, vibrant. Write a full bio, but stay positive, and only talk about what you enjoy doing for others, not what you need or want.
I'm not saying it is anything other that what it is, but it is also frustrating, because it is yet another place that marketing yourself is far more important than being honest.
It gets tiring to try to be more than we all actually are.
But, honestly, maybe that's just me at the end of a looooong, frustrating, tiring weekend with more of the same to look forward to in the foreseeable week...
"How are you?", we all ask. "Doing great.", we all lie in reply.
@elpasocuddler and @FunCartel - that's enough back and forth here. If you've not blocked each other - then do so now. Thanks. @elpasocuddler - you specifically have some homework. Check your account.
Getting back to the OP . @420Snuggler one method I used when I first got on here many moons ago was to reach out to someone let them know my interest in at least chatting with them, but then adding “if you are truly not interested, can you at least do me the small favor of letting me know if anything in my approach or profile needs improvement?” I received a couple of good tips but it also turned some no’s into yeses. Why? Mainly because it generated a dialogue and I was willing to acknowledge points they made and learn a bit. Just a strategy that can make you stand out from the usual “Hey you wanna cuddle and crush some cabbage?”