@RockRollCuddle thats because most non pros on here don’t last, aren’t active very long, don’t post their actual pictures, and the majority of women on here for social and economic reasons either turn pro soon after joining the site or leave.
Just work on yourself and dont try to cuddle the women everyone wants to cuddle. And have a bank account just to hire pros if you need a cuddle that immediate. It's best to just shoot your shot to every enthusiast in a 100-150 mile radius.
I echo with the same sentiments with timetocuddle07. Take a break from checking your account for a several days at a time. Odds are you won't get a message back. Realize you are most likely just a paycheck for the pros. God wilingly you find a good pro, and just stick with her.
If you find a good pro or an enthusiast, I suggest you keep looking for another or two. Because especially in your current emotional state, I think it is easier to catch unrequited feelings when you're seeing just the same person. And you may even self sabotage, because she may be meeting others while you have just her to reach out to. Thus risk putting pressure on her. Or you feeling somewhat the same way you are now.
@timetocuddle07 why on earth would you want a separate bank account just for professional cuddling?
@CuddlesinSoCal those things may be true in your area, but they are absolutely not in mine. The photos are always real, and the average time that a professional is active is of the order of a year at least. Very, very few women here 'turn' professional - the professionals all start out as professionals.
@CuddleDuncan - Budgeting purposes. You don't want to spend your rent money on a cuddle.
@Mike403 Interesting, perhaps it varies bank by bank. Though calling one's bank about the need to have separation of bills could be a good step. If one doesn't want to or can't deal with manually keeping track. I am sure they'll appreciate the feedback and could hopefully work something out. So it may be easier than having to manage two bank accounts.
@lovelight - I can have as many accounts as I want through my bank. It isn't hard. You just look at separate balances for each account. I do food delivery for DoorDash/Grubhub to make some extra cash on the side and thought about opening a couple more accounts. One for car repairs and one for taxes.
Wow, what a mix bag of feedback. How can you say there are 2 to 3 attractive enthusiasts ladies here??? It appears my version of CC is different from yours as I’ve not seen any unattractive human here (well, except for those without pictures). I’m new to CC and it is obvious that there are a lot more men here than women but when I put in the effort to write a thoughtful message, I do usually get a response. I have only had one weird action from a lady here that asked to exchange phone numbers and blocked me immediately after we exchanged numbers (we never even got to talk).
As many others have pointed out, this is a common internet problem found on any community website. I think platforms can do more to help here though.
On a technical level, is there any suggestions from men and women that they feel would help increase their likelihood of response or responding to messages?
The scenario that I'm most interested in learning more about is members joining the site, receiving lots of messages, then deciding not to read them (often pages and pages) but they are still actively using the site daily. This pattern can be seen mostly amongst female accounts. We're under the speculation that these accounts would like to use the site differently, i.e. they would prefer to seek (hence not reading messages, but still actively using site) rather than be seeked.
Any suggestions on helping improve things so it feels more successful and rewarding for all would be great!
@Gary I don't think there's much to be done from the technical side. We already have a mute option when a member isn't going to be ready for quite a long time to recieve messages from new members.
Perhaps we could have a verified welcome bot sending links to suggested good profile set up. That way people can hopefully put some effort into it and help their chances of success.
@Gary
Given how ubiquitous this problem is across every online platform where men are trying to connect with women, I don't think there is any real solution. I remember years and years ago getting on OKCupid for the first time, and being completely stunned at how difficult it was to get women to reply to me, given that I always thought I was an attractive person who did pretty well with women.
If there were a reasonable solution to this issue, surely one of the big dating apps with a lot more resources than CuddleComfort would have figured it out by now.
However, something that I think would really help is to temper expectations of new users. As I recall, the text one sees as a new user seems to imply that finding a cuddle is a really easy, quick process. Then when a user actually gets on the site, sends dozens of messages and doesn't get a single reply, it can be really frustrating or depressing, especially for less Internet savvy users who may not have used any dating apps before and are new to the experience of constant rejection.
Yeah, I just looked at the main cuddlecomfort.com page when not logged in... That "How it Works" section is really misleading.
I'm not necessarily saying you should have a big headline saying "Hey just so you know you'll probably hardly ever get a reply from women", but... something to give people a more realistic impression.
I have a more radical suggestion too. I doubt you'd be interested in this, but... As far as I can tell the vast, vast majority of cuddles that take place from this site are between pro and client. There are more pro women than enthusiast women, and also the pro women cuddle many, many more men than enthusiast women. I guarantee you there are several pros in my area who each individually have cuddled far more men than every enthusiast in my area combined, ever. In terms of actual cuddle activity, enthusiast cuddles are kind of a small niche here, although that's not the impression one would get reading the forum.
So why doesn't the site lean into that? Right now it presents itself on its home page as a site where enthusiasts can connect to cuddle.... and then mentions "Oh yeah by the way there are pros here too..." Why not reverse it, and lead with "We're the best platform for pro cuddling" and then say "oh and also you can try to connect with enthusiasts if you want."
I think it would give new users a much more realistic impression of what the site is really like.
Maybe limiting the number of first messages you can send out, as a daily limit? And maybe a rule where if there are 10 unread messages in someone's inbox, they can't receive anymore messages? @CuddleDuncan had some good suggestions on this if I recall.
@sunnysideup I think 10 is too low and can lead to it being abused. Some people are known to abuse systems like that. Given all it'd take is to create 10 accounts or a buddy system to cause women to not receive new messages. Kind of like this: https://www.techdirt.com/articles/20190918/00363543015/jerks-reporting-women-who-swipe-left-them-tinder-once-again-highlighting-how-content-moderation-gets-abused.shtml
Everyone. Yes, you too. All of you. Lay off the personal attacks. This thread alone generated at least 5 flags.
You've got 24 hours to edit/update if you even have the twinge of an idea that you committed a personal attack, warranted or not. After that, game over for this thread.
@Mike403 Oh, if it's with the same bank then that should be okay.
@sunnysideup - There is actually a limit to how many new people you can message in one day; If you try to message more than 50 new people a day (or about that many), then your messages will stop going through to others (who are new to you) and you will be given a 24-hour “cool down” warning.
You can still messages friends and longer-term connections on here which you’ve had for awhile, just no more new accounts to you for that 24-hour period.
{Don’t ask me how I know this…}
@cuddleduncan I don't have one for pros this place is like a last resort for cuddling and affection in my life. If It's a drought in the season. I am saying for folks who need cuddles asap and have no patience or nothing else to occupy their time and life
With few exceptions, all women on here are looking to make a buck. There are currently 2 male pros who are actually getting female clients, and the dudes are good looking, in their 20s, and their female clients are about 3 times their age; god knows what they must even look like.
This...this comment is just so hecking yikes that I can't even and don't want to even. You could have worded this a lot better, @CuddlesinSoCal instead of throwing the blanket. You are painting a pretty bad picture of the site by generalizing pros. Pros such as myself, as well as others I've interacted with here on the site, are not simply 'looking to make a buck'. The amount of bookings I've gotten on here over the past 3 years, if I was looking to make a buck, would have sent me offline with a deactivated account long ago.
Comments like this need to stop. They're not helpful and not even truthful.
@Catloaf 100% agree with your post
I just want to reiterate that while rejection or no reply doesn’t feel great, you are not entitled to anybody’s attention. You can’t demand replies, and behavior like this is probably going to act as a red flag, making it less likely for you to receive replies.
@Catloaf :
@CuddlesinSoCal - Can you make your Font just a little bit Bigger?
I’m having trouble reading it because it is so tiny.
@CuddlesinSoCal Hmm. You said most?
With few exceptions, all women
You are generalizing by using the word "all", and sending a subtle, dishonest message that makes the site look bad with what you wrote. I imply nothing, and if people come here with the explicit goal of making money, that's their journey. I don't say whether that's a good or bad thing in my post, whatsoever. Thanks for playing.
I look at it this way. If a professional cuddler doesn't want to cuddle with me it's her loss. It just means that she won't be getting my money and someone else will.
Sorry, all, but that's a wrap on this one.