Hey guys do you think it is any reason to stay on this site? Some not all cuddlers will require a deposit before a session then they will disappear! So they are stealing money without providing a cuddling session.
You pays your money and you takes your chances. I have dealt with two pros so far and I left a deposit each time and they did not scam me. You can report them if they are still on the site, but yes if they delete themselves you are kind of screwed. You could file a dispute with your credit card company or the money transfer service, but as with anything else in life CAVEAT EMPTOR
I would never pay a deposit. That's a scam waiting to happen.
Never pay a deposit
I wouldn't say it is all a scam. If someone has been around a while and has a lot of good karma she can mostly be trusted. However, I would not pay a deposit out of principle. I'm not that interested or that desperate to pay to cuddle and on top of it be deemed untrustworthy to have to pay a deposit. Yeah I know the reasons why some want deposits, so when someone inevitably comes on this thread and posts a long multi-paragraph explanation/admonishment, I won't be reading the post (I never read long posts on here anyway, it's a waste of time and energy).
When I was a mobile DJ securing a deposit was de rigeur for me. I always got 25% up front to be applied to the final balance. When you hire a photographer, somebody to build you a deck, or any other professional offering any service, a deposit is par for the course. Show them the respect and trust they deserve…after all for cuddle pros they are putting their own safety on the line meeting a stranger from the internet and engaging in an activity which is emotionally intimate.
In my limited time in this community it seems like many pros don’t require deposits after the initial session anyway….one you are established with them that trust should be there. Check their karma if you are not sure about booking a new pro. And trust your gut.
That’s awful, I’m sorry that’s happened to you. I’d second @Spud424’s recommendation and talk to your credit card company to get the money back asap!
Unless you’re located an hour+ away or will have an overnight stay I don’t think a deposit should be required due to your easygoing bio and amazing karma (and friends list!). If I were you, I would avoid pros who ask for a deposit if you don’t fall into the above categories.
One thing that could help you sus out a pro is to have a phone call or ask to have a quick Zoom meeting! I don’t see a pro being against that since it could also make them feel ease. That conversation could probably be a big giveaway as to whether or not you’re on the same page. Hope that helps, and I hope you find what you’re looking for!
NEVER pay for something in advance. It's that simple. PayPal, Venmo, CashApp, etc. It's far too easy for the other person (scammer or not) to take the money and run. Just DON'T do it, and if someone still insists on not taking good ole cash, then delete them ASAP.
@Spud424
The same can be said for the people paying for cuddling. Safety goes both ways.
Also, you can't compare hiring somebody to cuddle with you to hiring somebody to build a deck. To built a deck, you have to buy supplies, hire workers, etc.
@eptx and be much more official than a cuddling pro in terms of licensing, registration, permits, taxes, business practices, etc. It's an apples to oranges comparison.
I paid a deposit and I wasn’t scammed, but thanks for the warning. Some people for sure will scam. In fact, a professional cuddler wasn’t replying after the first reply! It is insane! On top of that, she lives not far, so like is she just trying to grab attention or what? I reported her, she should have been banned or at the least suspended in my opinion. I even fitted in her age range preference and gender preference. There is no way it could have been due to racism, if you guys were wondering that.
Lot of times I my self took the initiative and voluntary offer to pay full price in advance. I never got scam. I think it depends who you choose.
@frace95 ~ Could be she's too busy to make time for you... Or, could be you weren't a fit for other reasons... Like, maybe a little too much of your entitlement was showing...?? 🤷♀️
Incase it hasn't been brought to your attention previously, no person from this site, Pro or not, is under any obligation whatsoever to return your messages, let alone cuddle you.
Additionally, reporting someone for not replying to you is childish at best and a complete waste of our volunteers' time. In my opinion, it's you who should be admonished for your behavior - Not the Pro.
The deposit issue is really tricky and I've been wrestling with it since I started as a pro. I understand why you wouldn't want to send a deposit to a super new pro with no karma... that feels shady. If its someone who has tons of karma and has been doing this a while, clearly they are taking cuddling seriously and I think are more trustworthy. I agree with @Spud424 , the concept of a deposit for any service provided is not unreasonable or scammy by nature. But this sort of online no identity platform makes it ripe for scams. Because of the scam problem, I don't generally charge a deposit on a first meeting. I find the Zoom video chats greatly lessen last minute cancellations. I've been considering charging when I travel, because of the hotel costs. In my hometown if someone cancels on me that I've never met with before, I generally don't charge the cancellation fee if its the first offense, but then I do require a deposit if they try to book again. Still trying to decide how I want to proceed in the future.
Yeah if you're getting a room and traveling to me, no problem. But if I'm going to be the one getting a room and/or traveling to you, I will be getting a deposit or the whole thing's off. 🤷♀️ Sorry but scams happen on both sides.
@frace95 banned or suspended for not responding to you in a timely fashion? Okie dokey then.
Ooh the irker she is !
Commercialized cuddling seems like a contradiction, and so is apt to lead to crass behavior that belongs more to the marketplace than to cuddling. One thing that might help is creating a higher threshold to be granted professional status. I'm not sure what but if there are scammers among the pros then is there a way to insure against that? It ought to be enough that the pink Pro label is worth hanging onto, while there's no vetting whatsoever for the clients. The pros who I know complain that no-shows rob them of time that could have been spent with a paying client. As a massage therapist, I get paid for no-shows. I've even gotten a tip one time! As for ideas to solve this, does anybody more clever than me know if bonding is a good solution?
The only situation in which I'd say a deposit makes sense is if the pro has to travel far for an outcall session. That way, in the event the client cancels, the pro is compensated for their time.
Well one way to ensure someone shows up is if the percentage that goes to CC is taken from the clients credit card once they book so there’s incentive for the client to show up. As for pro cuddlers that could be scammers I’ve only ever encountered one and they ended up being banned. The marketplace takes care of itself. I know of pro cuddlers who when they first started out they weren’t paid up from and were scammed of their fee. The client who did this was banned or deleted their own account afterwards.
I agree with much of what many are saying here. You take your chances. I would recommend not to be as zealous to meet or set up a cuddle. Take your time and have as much communication with the other party as much as possible. Let’s say you reach out to someone with no “friends” or karma, then maybe explain to them that you don’t feel comfortable giving a deposit or find another cuddled you feel more comfortable with.
Who has more reputation at stake in the event of a no-show? That is the question that should determine how much of a deposit is warranted, and the answer will depend on the individuals.
I've run into several scammers. They all took prepay. I don't like prepay.
Before I required deposits, I had a hotel room and had a client no show. It's not like in my area there's a long waiting list of clients to call and try to fit in when there's last-minute cancellation or no show. No deposit, no go.
In the past two years of being on here I've only paid a deposit once. I doubt I will pay one again unless I'm really needing a cuddle session and every other pro or friend I know is busy. I would just avoid deposits. I don't think the site will reimburse you for it if they flake.
Funny, I was thinking of implementing a deposit policy because so many cuddlers have ghosted or cancelled on me here, I guess I get to keep getting scammed ::shrug::
@Drop_the_Mike - here's info from the forum rules about deposits:
>Pros requesting or requiring deposits in advance aren't all scammers. While I won't say all aren't as some do make it that far to get a Professional tag, Pros stating that they require a deposit can be for a number of reasons. For some it's how they ensure a potential Client is serious about holding a session date/time they may otherwise be able to schedule with someone else and don't want to risk losing money if you don't show -OR- they've had issue(s) with you in the past about cancelling and still want to book with you yet are being cautious about booking with you -OR- they could require it of all first-time cuddlers (first time seeing them) or new site members who have no photo and limited-to-no information about themselves filled out on their profile.. again doing so as a precaution to being stood up. When in doubt, best to check for Karma to show they have met with other members as we do not verify or do background checks on any site members. We have seen a trend of scammers though that state requiring half of a typically $100-180/hour session fee paid via iTunes gift cards or the like and these members should be reported as scammers.
@quixotic_life I see that you are newer than me. For your information, I thought that professionals are required to respond to those whose schedule is within fit, especially if within reasonable distance because like 3 years ago, I was going to try out to be a professional cuddler, over in a cuddling facility, and I have put down that I would want to cuddle only with females near my age who are not transgenders, and the person in charge of hiring said she will not hire me do to saying that in that time or ever, so that is why I thought professional cuddlers were required in each site to say yes if within reasonable distance and if within fit to schedule as long as the client isn’t being rude or isn’t asking for non platonic or sexual things/services.
@frace95 pros are not bound to chat and see you they are independent contractors and have a right to choose to not see someone
@frace95 ~ I'm confused... You've been on CC longer than me and in that time you hadn't learned a non-reply to you isn't a reportable offense nor is it deserving of being banned?? That's just bananas!! Glad I replied if that's the case - But now I'm wondering if there's something inherently or systemically wrong, when so many believe they're owed something (like a reply) from others... and are taken aback when told their expectations aren't reasonable... 🤔
I have been scammed on dating sites so no deposit up front. Genuine or otherwise. Usually for men the females are too attractive professionals pics. That screams scam
A deposit can make sense for an established business with a reputation because there's a big asymmetry in the investment and knowledge of each party. If I book a massage at the spa down the street, from our mutual perspectives there's a much greater chance I will no-show than the spa will. So a deposit may be reasonable.
But when it comes to this site... if I'm booking a random pro I've never seen before with little or no karma... I'm just as suspicious of her as she is of me. So the idea that I should put a deposit down is actually pretty absurd; why should I be the one to take a risk to insure her against a no-show and not vice versa?
If she has been on the site a while and has a lot of karma it's a little different, but still, I've definitely been stood up by pros with plenty of karma.
The only time I can recall that I paid a deposit, I ended up cancelling before the session because I started to feel based on her texting that she wasn't a person I actually wanted to meet. She did refund my deposit, with a lot of poop emojis as the Venmo message. Very classy.