Situation

Andy1996Andy1996
in General

Good evening to everyone on this sight.
So I am on Social Security. And I have had to cancel several sessions with people due to the fact that I have been rather ashamed to mention that I can’t afford it sessions because of how expensive they are.
I have thought about mentioning this to some people that I potentially would like to meet with.
How do you think I should mention this. The main reason I am nervous, is because I feel like I might get judged. I understand that people need to make a living. But I just wish it was a fair compromise that we can reach. As I am quite touched deprived at the moment, I should also mention that I am visually impaired. Any thoughts are appreciated.

Comments

  • CatloafCatloaf
    edited September 2021

    @Andy1996 There are many pros who will work with you within your budget so long as you are open to communicating your needs. This is done by therapists quite often, it's called a "sliding scale" for those who aren't aware.

    Not all pros will be willing to accommodate you because they have been taken advantage of or shortchanged in the past, but I would make your intent to be a respectful client very clear, and mention your needs and how your pro could help you with a modification to rate.

    Some pros may jump in and say, "My rate is my rate, and if I lower it for one person, I have to do it for others". And I would say that's false. In my opinion, pros can (and should) be able to work with clients who have financial barriers preventing them from accessing the service, especially as a result of separation, or illness, or what have you.

    It's part of the reason why I have left my own rate at $60, and even when trained, I don't plan to go higher than $80. The people who need this most need to be able to access it, and they can't do so with exorbitant prices.

  • Andy1996Andy1996

    @catloaf
    I totally agree with you. The question is, how do I explain this to them? And what happens if I am then placed in a situation where it is assumed that I am just saying that to get out of paying the normal rate. Which those are not my intention at all.

  • CatloafCatloaf

    @Andy1996 It can be a slippery slope, I hear you. And to be truthful, a lot of people might assume what they want to assume regardless. But personally, if it were myself, I would just shoot my shot from the beginning to eliminate any possibility of disappointment down the road, for either party. When approaching, it can be hard to do, but you need to really not care about what impression you're giving off in your situation, and just be open. Like you're being right here in this thread.

    Scope out the pros you are interested in, and simply ask about whether they are open to working with people on Social Security, or fixed incomes. It's inquiring about service, not locking anyone into a booking. Pros willing to move the goal post for you will be experienced, and will know what your intent is so long as you're communicating it like you are here.

    For instance, I've been at this long enough that I can always tell a genuine need from someone who is just being a cheapskate. And there are tons of cheapskates out there. But there's also quite a few people out there who might need a cuddler, and can't afford it through really no fault of their own.

    The pros who realize that latter fact will be entirely happy to come to you and meet you where you're at.

  • RezzRezz

    In addition to echoing what @Catloaf is saying , you can also inquire about discount packages. Some pros may offer a set number of sessions or hours a month for one rate.

    Generally speaking most of us here don't mind negotiating with someone who has a genuine need for our service and we feel they are not trying to low ball us.

  • LovelightLovelight

    I'd add you may also consider massage to help bridge the gap, I think some massage schools have students who do it more affordably. Or even getting a head massage or for a set duration will be cheaper for you and maybe for a longer session you might, not sure get a bit of a discount given your situation. Granted it isn't cuddling, though it may still help bridge the gap and provide you therapeutic touch. Or instead you can wait longer and save up to hire a pro depending on your needs and how all that's going.

    You need to differentiate what's your responsibility and what is not. Other people's decision to be judgemental or their decision to not properly communicate with you is not your responsibility. Provided you're nice it says nothing about you.

  • [Deleted User]CharlesThePoet (deleted user)

    Another excellent source of touch is a barbershop, granted once this COVID thing is contained...

    But there are probably quite a few disabled grooming benefits available to you.

    A shampoo, shave, and haircut are a very touch and social oriented experience, especially if you can find a good barber.

  • BabichevBabichev

    If you have a skill you can trade, offer to do that for half the payment. Even if you don’t have a skill, offer to do yard work or something.

  • CuddleDuncanCuddleDuncan Mod

    In some corners of the therapy professions over here there is a fairly standard way of helping at least some people with this. If you want a session at peak times, (in their case before work/lunchtime/after work) then you pay full whack. But if you come mid-morning or mid-afternoon, particularly on a day that suits the therapist, then they will offer a discount appropriate to your individual circumstances.

    @Catloaf is correct, if you're experienced it's usually pretty easy to tell the genuine from the fake. (I've done this in other contexts.) If it's not obvious at once, the wise service provider offers the prospective client some rope: the fakes hang themselves within a couple of messages.

    Be open, straightforward and polite and you should be fine. If somebody wants to think ill of you, well that's life.

  • Andy1996Andy1996

    Thank you all for your feedback.
    I really do like this website because it feels like my safe space. And I have met some truly amazing people from all different walks of life on this site.

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