Uprooting

edited September 2021 in General

I currently live in Texas. I just got a job offer that will relocate me to Orange County, California. I've lived in Texas almost my whole life. Taking the plunge seems exciting but also a little scary. The motivation is to change industries towards something with a more futuristic outlook. Curious about people's experiences in uprooting and starting over somewhere new?

Comments

  • I've been like a leaf in the wind my whole life. California, Texas, Arizona. It's interesting how different things can be across state lines. Even northern California and southern are totally different. Uprooting is always bittersweet. I find it exciting, like an adventure. Having a job and home already set up really helps.

    I suggest diving in to local activities, whatever you enjoy doing. It's easy to try to stay inside where it's safe. It's scary! But so much fun.

    Keep in touch with the friends and family back home, but go find new friends!

  • [Deleted User]arghdaddy (deleted user)

    I did the same, but within state. It’s exciting and great for you if it’s a better opportunity. I’m originally from Orange County so hit me up for info & suggestions. It’s a great place to live but it’s expensive. It’s definitely worth it.

  • I have lived in 18 states. Most places are what you make of it. Prepare for sticker shock in California compared to Texas.

  • [Deleted User]CharlesThePoet (deleted user)

    Last year we sold the house that not only was I born in, but so was my mother. Our family had built that house, and lived in it, for 74 years. But the best treatment center for my mother was in Colorado Springs, and COVID had hit, and getting out of the craziness of the 20+ million people in Southern California with a nest egg seemed like the wisest, if most painful, course of action.

    So we sold the house, consolidated all that time and stuff into a small shipping container, and came out here.

    The differences, especially during COVID, have been minimal.

    SNOW! THUNDERSTORMS! HAILSTORMS! And, that's about it...

    I am looking forward to one day being able to cruise around the new town, find the spots where live music happens, perform in front of actual people again (maybe even for dancers)...

    But, for the most part, wherever you go, there you are. Not much actually changes.

  • One thing I would mention, as it's come up in other discussions elsewhere - if you have firearms, then be very very careful to check the list of CA-legal firearms. Anything NOT on that list could land you in jail, and it's an ever-shrinking list. Every new firearm has to be State-approved to go on the list, even if the only difference to a previous model is the color, and I believe the State only adds a firearm if it takes two others off the list... You'll be background-checked just for buying ammo, so you'll have to either buy from an FFL or have it shipped to one. I think it's fairly hard to get a conceal-carry permit too.

  • [Deleted User]WriterGF (deleted user)

    I moved from northeastern PA to Connecticut 21 years ago. CT isn't perfect, but it has a lot more going for it. Exploring and discovering new places is half the fun of a move like this.

  • This is the kind of time I'd say: Follow your heart.

    I personally tend to get pretty attached to places, unless I've some good reasons to relocate. You seem to have a good reason to. Though you could pay where you are a visit if you ever feel home sick. So I wouldn't be too worried about it. Besides once there you might find that it was relatively a big upgrade for you.

    Good luck on your next journey! :)

  • Cost of housing in SoCal is huge. Price of gas there is the highest in the nation (currently $4.40/ gal). If you can handle that and don't mind the crowding, you will adjust well.

  • [Deleted User]CharlesThePoet (deleted user)

    One note about moving into SoCal for the first time, especially if you aren't from a truly large city...

    You will NEVER be alone on the street.

    Ever.

    There is always someone driving down any big street, and you rarely go 15 minutes without someone driving down your small residential street.

    It's surprisingly strange for newbies.

    (I've had to get used to exactly the opposite here in Colorado Springs, where there is comparatively no traffic at all.)

  • I just moved states to where I knew no one. My experience is that it takes a while to feel at home, anywhere from 6 mos to 4 years depending on the place. The first thing I do is find my cafe and my grocery store, and repetitively visiting them gives me a sense of being connected far before I meet any humans to hang with (especially in covid times). I also work to make my home a nest and I find a good hobby (was doing jigsaw puzzles for a while) to keep me occupied while I get my bearings. I think generally if you have any fear of being alone or of the emptiness of existence, it can be challenging. It's good to actively look for places to plug in I find until you find your true people.

  • MeetUp might be a way to connect with local people who have common interests. These days with the pandemic some options are limited but there are still options.

  • edited September 2021

    If you are not adept at meeting people you will struggle. I have been moving constantly since I was 6 months old. My dad was a career military officer and back in the day they would move you every 6-12 months. You become very good at meeting people but keeping them at arm’s length, because why expend the emotional energy when you know what will eventually come.The one saving grace as a child is many of the military families would be moved to the same locations so it was always neat to meet someone, then move, and the rediscover them three years later. Unfortunately, children of career military personnel, particularly living through war times (my dad did three tours in Nam), have a high incidence of substance abuse, alcoholism, and suicide. That’s something the military doesn’t tell you at the recruitment office. On the flip side, I have seen all 50 states, so the blessing is I know where I do not wish to live.

    So it is no wonder that I travel constantly for work. Most people are so grounded by place that they do not handle the nomadic lifestyle very well and quit after 3-4 years. I can’t imagine life any other way but I do envy those who have a real hometown and lifelong friends that remember you as a child. But I get to reinvent myself routinely, so there is that.

    I would tell you @MCcuddles2 that you should take a trip to the place you are considering. Nothing worse than being trapped somewhere you despise—are you feeling me Fayetteville, NC? Also, make a checklist of the most important things to you. Community? Activities? Affordability? Diversity? I think you are smart and you are already aware of this, but do keep in mind that most of the people I have met who have lived somewhere most of their life tend to have a difficult time separating themselves from home.

  • Do it. You can always go back if you don't like it! And if the point is to advance in your career, if it's not your cup of tea, you can keep your head down and focus on just that and return home with neat new skills and lots of trash to talk about California. Warning though, OC is humongous with beautiful parts and hideous parts, and lots of peculiar quirks.
    And, if you love beaches like I do, there will be no going back. youre gonna be ours.

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