It seems really strange to me that any women would need to pay for a pro cuddler. The ratio of men to women heavily favors women. but then some women wont' cuddle someone who isn't within 5 years of their age, or really fit etc...lot of restrictions they have I imagine.
Trust me, it can be difficult for women to find a good cuddler.
Extremely difficult!!
Though to be fair I did just receive an invitation from someone who seems like a nice enough being, but I'm feeling so stressed with upcoming life changes, and the unknown, that I couldn't accept. At the moment I need the people who I already know and that know me. You know?
LOL
@Melancholy it's a real problem. We've seen it before on the forums quite a few times. This idea that it's easy for women to find men to cuddle with is simply not true. Sure it is true for lots of women, but "lots of" isn't close to "all". It's nothing to do with the women being unreasonably restrictive. It is sometimes to do with the shortage of all kinds of cuddlers in certain areas.
@ImajenMoon a vaccine for malaria is a much more difficult proposition than a vaccine for a virus. Nonetheless, people have been working on it for decades and we now have one:
WHO recommends groundbreaking malaria vaccine for children at risk https://www.who.int/news/item/06-10-2021-who-recommends-groundbreaking-malaria-vaccine-for-children-at-risk
None of the covid vaccines have been "rushed" in terms of safety or efficacy. They got through the system quickly because the administration was speeded up. For example, processes that normal run in series were run in parallel; and gaps between processes were eliminated. In the UK, one process that routinely starts several months after a trial is finished was started two weeks after the trial started. This alone saved about six months. Nothing was done differently, it's just that paperwork didn't sit in people's intrays for weeks or months without being looked at.
About 3.8 billion people have now received at least one dose of vaccine .... that's nearly half the world's population. If there was a problem we would know about it.
The Tuskegee Syphilis experiment and Thalidomide disaster happened two or three generations ago and were nothing to do with vaccines.
In other words, the real reason you are not keen on covid vaccination has not yet come to light. Which is ok, we all have stuff buried that's hard to dig up.
I'd cuddle you if I was close enough, even though you wouldn't cuddle me.
Way too many conditions for a cuddler. The non vaccinated condition is just absurd. Covid can be fatal and/or permanently damaging to your health.
I SWEAR I didn't see this level of DERAILMENT coming on this one! lol THE TOPIC OF THE THREAD IS THAT A WOMAN IS ABOUT TO EMBARK ON THE PAID CUDDLING JOURNEY.... Someone mentioned that now, we're getting a clue about how it is for some of the guys here. I feel you on that... Although I do sincerely appreciate the insight that some have given, concerning what may be the primary issue in my cuddlelessness, I was hoping more for a chance to hear from other ladies who may have done this. Thank you to those of you who have STAYED ON TOPIC, and shared briefly about your experience with paid cuddling!!! @quixotic_life -- I've "hammered" a few folks here, too, so guess it was my turn! lol Sending you BIG LOVE vibes, hoping things straighten out for you quickly, so you can take that new Cuddler up on his offer!!! @Lovelight, Thank you! I WOULD like some tips! I'd enjoy talking with you about this!!! Oh! And thanks to all who have wished me well in my Cuddle Search!! \ Imajen
@ImajenMoon Thank you for the open mind. When I first joined this site was not open to paid pro cuddling but women like you that posted about hiring male cuddlers, helped change my mind about hiring mostly female pros. Thank you once again!🤗
My daughter in law currently lives 5 hours from her husband due to finishing college. She gets her cuddle fix by going to the local animal shelter. Not that it's a perfect replacement for a human cuddle, but I could see you cozying up to some fuzzy wuzzies. Of course, some of the puppies might cross platonic boundaries by endlessly licking your face.... Call it a casualty of cuddle!
@ImajenMoon My first experiences cuddling were with a male professional. It was the first time after a physically abusive relationship that I was able to experience close physical intimacy with another human, let alone with a man. Him being a professional and having a very thorough conversation about boundaries and expectations was what made the experience safe enough to let myself into, even though my body was still scared of being touched. It was incredibly healing and even though I've clearly worked through those issues with physical touch, I still intend to connect with AND PAY male and female pros because my paying for the experience is me gifting myself a session that is focused on creating a safe container and cuddling experience that's perfect for me. I'm not being selfish in asking for what I want and directing the session because it is their job and what I'm paying for. (Obviously people can push those boundaries too and I would never, but you get the point.) When I conduct professional sessions for others, I am totally focused on them and their needs so it's a totally different experience when I hire someone to cuddle me.
I think it's a privilege to gift yourself a cuddle session when it's possible, and not necessarily a concession. You could get on a dating site and find someone to be physically close to, but there's no guarantee that they won't want more. Paying a pro (in most cases) should be a guarantee that you can absolutely know the person's intentions and relax into a session in a way you wouldn't necessarily be able to otherwise.
@calmcontact --yours is the kind of open courage and wisdom that makes me unable to stay away from this place for very long! Thank you for sharing! I see how the paid aspect WOULD lend more legitimacy to a cuddle--especially after trauma. Thank you for this! The idea no longer seems so "strange" or "weird"---kind of wish I'd have come to it sooner!
@SuperManCuddles, such kind words! I'm just glad you stayed!! I'm working on getting my nerve up. Too bad you're ALL THE WAY OUT THERE!!! heeheehee!!! Any chance of your FLYING over to Ohio, in this life?
@creedhands, woooo... And I thought I had it rough! I'm glad your daughter found herself some fuzzy cuddle surrogates-- being that far away from Hubby's GOT to be rough! Gotta say, though, while I DO like 'em hairy, I still prefer the two-legged Cuddling Kind! lol Great suggestion, though.. Imajen
Awe!❤️Thank you! Ohio is definitely on my future travel list! @ImajenMoon Also thank you @calmcontact for sharing your personal experiences with pro cuddling!
I wish everyone seeking cuddles, paid or otherwise, all best wishes. I've had wonderful experiences here and I wish that for all.
I do not come here for politics- politics are ugly these days, and other social media platforms have enough politics. I'm also not here to read harmfully ignorant content.
So when someone posts on their profile: "I AM NOT VACCINATED, and I am NOT interested in cuddling those who are. Period." Well, I will simply shake my head in wonder, block that person, and move on.
@CuddleDuncan I think you're wrong but that's ok, everyone is entitled to their opinion there is definitely NOT a shortage of male cuddlers on this site. So many women I talk to say they have so many messages from male cuddlers they have to mute their accounts. My inbox is usually crickets. These women don't even have profiles that say anything....very sparse with little thought put into it yet they get dozens of interested cuddlers. So yes they do have to spend time culling the herd and figuring out who they can trust...but the problem is completely different for men than it is for women. In fact what's funny is how many decide to turn pro so they can make money...when they see all those men who want to cuddle with them.
@ImajenMoon I want to say that I think you're an amazing human being, and it is my wish that you find a cuddle person who is just right, who allows you to experience all the best that cuddling has to offer.
In the meantime, I'm sending you a huge armful of the warmest and most sincere e-hugs!
@ImajenMoon there is certainly no shame in having to hire a pro. @calmcontact summed up the reasons just as well as anyone could. I would add that a pro would be more than willing to cuddle (within the boundaries of platonic cuddling of course) you even when other enthusiasts might find your "criteria" too much of a hassle. Speaking only for myself, I always seek out a session with a pro when I find myself in a place where I just don't have the ability to reciprocate or hold space for anyone else - with a pro I pay for the session, and the exchange is done. No "I held you then, would you hold me now?" situation. It's often the sessions that I have with a pro that help me get my touch needs to be met to a point where I don't appear needy or clingy in my other relationships. I also found that regular sessions with a pro are what help me get in the right headspace to appear attractive as a cuddle partner for other enthusiasts, so they also return back an abundance of platonic touch in that way.
@JoyfulHeart ~ wow. Just wow! THANK YOU!! Your quiet, heartfelt comments, and genuine growth while on this board have OFTEN been a Joy to me! Thank you for your kind wishes for my success! Frankly, I'm still reeling from @calmcontact stopping in to put her ENTIRE FOOT down on the answer to this thread!!! THANK YOU, AGAIN... There are times when, as a person, we each have come to a "Hard Pass"---and that's whether or not ANYONE ELSE AGREES with it. This is one of those times for me. If that gets me "blocked," okay. We're all adults here. Do you.. @CuddlesByDeep , love, love, LOVE the idea of getting my touch needs met to the point where I don't appear needy or clingy in my other relationships!!!!!!!!!!! My Fella is Intelligent, Funny, Kind, Giving, and more than willing to help others in need. Such a delight!! He just doesn't have A LICK OF the Love Language "Touch," so I'm always chasing around behind him, slobbering! lol As I said before, I'm kind of seeing how it might have been a better idea to check out Pros waaaaayyyy sooner than now! Guess we live and learn! Imajen
@calmcontact Thank you for speaking so eloquently as a woman about the benefits of hiring a male professional cuddler!
I started to wonder if seeking professional cuddlers was hampering my desire to seek 'real relationships'. I sometimes spend more time traveling for work than I do at home, which hasn't been conducive to building healthy partnerships in the past. I understand missing someone for months at a time, but trying to 'make up for lost time' can be emotionally exhausting. Additionally, the time apart often finds two partners having very different expectations for the relationship. I often return, finding what I need most is having someone to share stories with, hearing about movies/shows/etc... that I may have missed out, and an insane amount of hugs. Returning from my latest trip, I've discovered that a professional cuddler can fulfill these needs easily. The expectations in return are not much... yes, they are professional, so there is the expectation of payment (duh). Beyond that, it's just respect and decency, which should be universal anyways. Like @calmcontact said FAR more eloquently, I can expect my needs, within reason, to be the focus during the session and not feel selfish about it. I've been blessed that with both times, my professional cuddlers seemed to be more in tune with my needs than I was. I couldn't remember the last time I laughed to the point of tears. I couldn't remember the last time I was so comfortable being held that I started to doze off. The only time my ever-present social anxieties even factored in, was during the moments right before initially meeting. Even then, I was quickly put at ease with a calming hug or a funny anecdote about how nervous THEY were. It just seems to be simpler with a professional cuddler.
I think my original intention to state my own reasons for hiring professional cuddlers got mentally hijacked by the sheer appreciation for the professionals on this site. I'm grateful for and in awe of anyone who can convey so much compassion for someone they just met. My experiences were genuinely life-enhancing... Thank you for being there
@jaswbrown ❤️ right back at ya!
@Melancholy what you say is obviously entirely correct, as a general rule. However, there are plenty of exceptions.
Only this very week I have chatted to two women who cannot find anybody to cuddle with. In neither case are they being 'fussy' and both have good profiles. One lives in an area where there are few cuddlers, and the ratio of men to women is about 1:1 (I checked). She has been on the site for some time and contacted me, but is much too far away. The other is relatively new. She has been inundated with men who have not read her profile, but has not made contact with anybody who is even remotely suitable. She would like to hire a professional man but there isn't one.
So there you have it. Two women this week alone that have been in touch with one random male user, namely me. Multiply that up by the whole site and that's a lot of women who need a cuddle and can't get one.
@CuddleDuncan So she has had tons of guys reach out to her but none of them are suitable. That means she is being "fussy". Wow, life is so hard compared to men who never get messages from women at all. If she lives in an area where there are few cuddlers and there's an equal amount of men, it's going to be a lot harder for men to find one than a woman (without paying). But you have your opinion.
Probably narrowing down possibilities of cuddlers to only those who subscribe to fringe ideas about vaccination 🦇💩 is limiting, be they pros or enthusiasts.
@UCpaaHVg6u0 I wouldn’t say that. Having those fringe ideas about vaccines opens up all those huggable Proud Boys as matches.
@Letsholdeachoth no, she is not being fussy. The messages she has been receiving are from men who are not remotely suitable for her. And she is not remotely suitable for them: they message her because they are lonely and desperate. I can't say more because I don't want to compromise her confidentiality.
I'm sorry you can't get the cuddles you need, I really am. I hope that one day you will be able to direct your anger towards those who deserve it, rather than other people who also can't get the cuddles they need.
@CuddleDuncan I've told you before not to attack me personally but you keep doing it. You're lucky you're online and not in front of me. Wow, I am not angry at all. Way to project feelings onto someone you don't know. A lot of men on here are lonely and desperate and I'm not one of them. I get all the attention I need from women and don't need this site to do it. Save your pity for someone who needs it.
I am thinking about that thread about keeping advice to one’s self.
I think there are some misinterpretations of what @CuddleDuncan was saying, and though parts of those counter statements are true in some instances, they certainly aren't the case for all, and seemingly seek to minimalize the issue presented.
It's predominantly women with profiles/photos that reveal they're one or more of the following: youthful, pretty, flirty, cute, in shape, healthy, slim, smaller framed, etc. who are both inundated with messages and coincidentally who make up the majority of Pros here. And it makes sense, because they possess typically desired qualities.
Granted there are those here who likely enjoy harassing women, aren't really looking to cuddle, don't differentiate between the types of attention they get as long as they're noticed, etc.
But the point is more so that there is a shortage of decent men, and there are many of us who don't land within the margins of what many of those few [decent] men are looking for (see above as the general criteria). Also, turns out men are actually just as selective as women (because we're all people and that's part of peopling).
So it stands to reason we women may find ourselves in consideration of hiring a pro too. And really, no matter how one identifies, it's not something many of us have had to wrap our heads around before and may take a bit more processing for some than others.
TL;DR I suppose the long and short of my comment is to state the obvious ~ If someone has stated something is an issue for them, it's an issue for them.
The fact that receivers have the luxury of choice in how they may respond ~ whether they choose showing empathy, understanding or acknowledgement, to belittling, criticizing or judging, adds to the reasoning so many tend to choose suffering in silence.
Finding a suitable cuddle partner within reasonable distance/travel constraints and who has a compatible schedule is really fricken hard for a lot of people, no matter their gender. So maybe we should try normalizing their thoughts of hiring Pros instead of pushing them further out and dismissing their experience(s).
Exactly. Thank you, @quixotic_life.
I'm sorry you can't get the cuddles you need, I really am. I hope that one day you will be able to direct your anger towards those who deserve it, rather than other people who also can't get the cuddles they need
@quixotic_life No misreading Duncan’s post on that. That is assumption, attack and condescension all in one. I never read the guy as angry, I read @Letsholdeachoth comments as plain disagreement which is fine. Duncan’s jab is unwarranted and misguided.