do you live for yourself or for others? do you worry what other people think? do you try to maintain an image around others that isn’t you?
In life there’s 1 guarantee & 1 certainty
@cuddles_ndream you alright hun?
Yus luv, just thinking out loud ♥️
Ooh I like the “luv” I’m gonna have to see that more . Ill pay a hefty sum lol.
But alright . If you’re having a moment today . I got you feel free to vent .
I was getting ready to say @Rain567 already made this post today, but much less depressing…
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Oh snap mine was depressing ? Sorry.
@SweetiSammi i missed it, I’ll look for it …
I believe that when we take care of our own needs, we are more likely to have a positive impact on the world around us.
When I believed that self-care was selfish, I was unable to lift those around me, no matter how hard I tried.
Self-care is only selfish when we are willing to hurt other people in the process.
Today, my happiness spills out, and sometimes it spreads to other people.
@Rain567 hopefully you got to read what I wrote before I deleted it, I felt like I was over sharing lol
@SweetiSammi I found it! If only i can delete this 1
@JoyfulHeart 💯
@cuddles_ndream i didn’t see anything . I missed it . 😔. You can message me . Who’s bothering you ? I’ll send them these kids to terrorize their souls .
Lmao 😅 🫂
You guys (in my expert opinion) are awesome!! 🎉🎊🎉🎊
@JoyfulHeart is constantly a sweety muffin.
@JoyfulHeart spills out and spreads like jelly on peanut butta
Stahhhhp!! 😳😳😳
🫂🫂🫂
@JoyfulHeart your presence on here is appreciated by all 🌌
@cuddles-ndream when you invest your money, there is a disclaimer that usually goes something like... "Past performance is not necessarily indicative of future results." We should come from the womb, with that, tattooed across our heads.
People can be real turds when we change. It means work for them. They have to wrap heads around your success or attempts to improve your life. It often illuminates their own stuff. You don't own their discomfort. But don't be surprised by it.
All I find I can do is just keep on making incremental, positive change.
But, I found that living for others, when it's my own choice, is very rewarded at times. Don't lose your big heart. Don't be discouraged by others.
You have to pat yourself on the back when you are living your best life.
Big hugs. People see you. Living your best life allows you to bless those around you and will attract kindness and excellence, into your life. Routing for you.
Peace
Hillel famously wrote, “If I am not for myself, who will be? If I am only for myself, who am I? If not now, when?”
When we fail to take care of ourselves, we cannot be there for others. This is why the airlines tell you if are traveling with someone dependent upon you and cabin pressure drops, put your own mask on first before you assist the person dependent on you.
However, we derive benefit from being helpful to others. I’ll give one example: A study found that massage could help alleviate symptoms of depression in older adults. However, another study at the same research institute found that depressed older adults gained even more benefit when they were trained to give massage to infants in the neonatal intensive care unit. Dr. Sapolsky, an expert on the physiological effects of stress, found that baboons who were groomed gained physiological benefits that countered the effects of stress but that those who did the grooming gained even more benefit. It has been shown repeatedly that volunteering and/or providing social support to others has both physiological and psychological benefit. Putting our own happiness first may very well come about by doing for others.
As for worrying about what others think about us - it depends on what we’re talking about. For the most part, I’ve never worried about it that much. However, there are times when social pressure can be a good thing. I’d like to think I do the right thing for the right reasons but I’ll admit there are times in my life when I’ve felt really angry or hurt and would love (I think) to do something bad to someone - flatten their tires or smash their car window. One thing that stops me is how humiliated I would feel if I did such a thing and others knew about it. I like to think of myself as a person who doesn’t do these kinds of things and appreciate the respect of those around me for being that kind of person. I don’t think that’s a bad thing. But when it comes to how I dress or what activities I enjoy or who I am dating or coloring my hair pink or purple or most other things in life, I really don’t care too much what others think. They aren’t living my life. Fortunately, people around me don’t care too much about those things either.
https://health.clevelandclinic.org/why-giving-is-good-for-your-health/
@Gallowglass thank you sooooo much for your kind words …… really!!!!!!! Big hugs to you 🙂🌌
Those who do disappoint others often disappoint themselves first. The irony is that this happens when they prioritize the wrong things in an effort to put themselves first. The key is to understand one principle, that the heart is deceitful. We see it in others so easily yet always deny it happens in ourself. But once you understand that you can be your biggest enemy, you can receive the truth. To love others as you love yourself requires that you love yourself enough to be honest with yourself. Sometimes that means letting go of the fantasy that someone loves you when they constantly abuse you or accepting someone who loves you enough to not mince words. Otherwise you'll find yourself deceiving others while deceiving yourself and wonder why people think of you when they say people will disappoint you.
I was about to write about how people disappointing me is rare. But then realized, that isn't really the case. I do get disappointed in others but it's usually short lived, because there's a natural shifting of 'blame' onto myself. From unrealistic to undefined expectations, to thinking more of someone than they've proven worthy of, to ignoring the indicators they c/wouldn't measure up, etc. The common denominator is always me and my thought process (or lack there of) that results in my being disappointed.
As far as putting my own happiness first... I'm closer now than I was a couple years ago. It's taking longer than I'd like but I'll get there eventually.
Putting our happiness first assumes that we know what will make us happy.
Golly, this is some deep stuff. It's like I've been cast adrift at the greeting card section of Walmart, and the only thing keeping me from drowning in a sea of ignorance is clutching madly at the displays brimming with brightly-colored cardstock.
@HogboblinZwei ~ Did you read all the cards before the water rose? Because if mine we're among them I'm pretty sure I'd be fired. And if not, and if Walmart were a vendor for my work, I'd demand that contract severed or I'd quit.