💞 ~ ☝ The KIND of MAN I want in my life...
Three things in life are not to be trusted: statistics, politicians, and farts.
Assumptions can be useful tools. But don't base your life on them.
Never cry over spilt milk, because it may have been poisoned.
W. C. Fields
@MissAdventurous Regarding the last photo... mood
An escalator can never break: it can only become stairs. You should never see an Escalator Temporarily Out Of Order sign, just Escalator Temporarily Stairs. Sorry for the convenience.
Mitch Hedberg
@FunCartel Your door is ajar.
I don't have a girlfriend. But I do know a woman who'd be mad at me for saying that.
"If all the girls attending the Yale prom were laid end to end, I wouldn't be a bit surprised."
Dorothy Parker
@MissAdventurous I was just explaining to my children how hard it is to parent them while rewiring my own neural pathways. It's exceptionally hard when there's intersectionality between my trauma and my desire to leave them with a smaller ACEs score!
~unknown
"I can't claim to understand, but I can still empathize."
Wise Cassandra from 9 years ago. I'm pretty consistent.
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