This thread it coming close to being locked. Proceed with caution. Be adult. If you think something is going on that violates the terms of service, report it. Accept that decisions made by the moderators may not always be to your liking for a variety of reasons. That doesn’t mean your report was in vain. We do not ban lightly. Your report may not have led to a ban when you think it should but at the very least it contributed evidence that could lead to a ban if there is another report.
@MidwestZest If you need to report someone, either a post or a profile, please use the site reporting system to do so. Your profile is almost 4 month old and you've only made 4 comments in the forums, 3 of which have been today in this thread while the other you gave a youtube link for a movie you're looking forward to 3 weeks ago. If you have something to report I will keep an eye out for it to look into, but it's hard to claim there is favoritism when you've only been here a short while or participated in the forums really until complaining about things now.
Seems like every Tom, Dick and Harry has an opinion on moderation these days.
I love the mods, btw. Voluntary thin blue line between productive cuddle conversations and anarchy.
I'm willing to overlook any slight disagreements about how moderation is performed, as it is a friggin voluntary force.
Keep doing you, you platonically beautiful sentinels of the cuddle world. 😍
If they think they can do a better job, maybe they should nominate themselves to be a moderator. That would be too stressful for me.
Good grief. Have some appreciation for mod/admins. This thread is supposed to be about them and they still have to put out fires. Thanks again mod/admin! Not an easy job.
Logged in today and saw a message from someone that was already banned, which probably saved me and others a good amount of effort with dealing with them and whatever dodgy stuff they were up to. Big thanks to the moderators and all they do!
I learned that if a woman wants to talk to me, 99% of the time, it's a scammer. I got in the habit of not responding to unsolicited messages unless I interacted with them before. It's hard to filter who is genuine on internet sites.
Can we ask why someone was banned? I had someone that canceled on me, but then wanted to be friends on here. I was fine with that, he was a lil weird but I don't judge. Then one day he said I wasn't responding to him in a timely manner lol granted, we never had a cuddle session, so I explained to him that I have other obligations such as a job and a family etc. He blocked me. Lol I'm good with that, but then today I noticed he was banned. What did I miss?
@Klaws - Likely stuff happened behind the scenes. Maybe he was a scammer or was sending non-platonic messages to another member that you don't know about, but the mods can see it.
@Mike403 thank you!
Pro tip and newsflash for Pros and enthusiasts, but if you're contacted by a new account without a profile pic, without karma, and want a same day appointment/get-to-gether? If they are requesting skin-to-skin and "can I snuggle in my boxers?" - they sure as hell don't know what platonic means. They are MORE than likely to be a formerly and not caught yet prior banned account.
Report them, report them, report them. The sooner we sweep the trash, the better we all are.
Do your rigorous vetting. If you have any doubts to their authenticity or their intentions, report them. We'll take it from here.
@Sideon - I'm not sure why they choose to come here when cuddling is more of a niche community. There isn't a shortage of "adult" sites for them to go to get what they're looking for.
@Mike403 I think it's precisely because they know they aren't supposed to be doing it here. It's the lure of breaking the rules.
Also, "getting caught" having a cuddling account over having the other kind can be more easily explained off to family or friends. And with data breaches like the Ashley Madison site back in 2015, the shame some would have of others finding out they used such a site leads those who think they can get it elsewhere, like here, has more of a draw. Personally, those who don't upload photos when making a profile here, while privacy is respected, to me it's already a red flag and if they opt to not send a photo through the site messaging system and want to send it via text, snapchat, or something else, that's another red flag for me. Those who try to do it here or keep trying to come back to find it must not be very good at using a search engine to find it elsewhere.
I don't know how I would explain to somebody that I hired a professional cuddler. That's not very understood outside of this community.
Massage therapists are also bothered by guys looking for more than massage. I’ve often wondered why they annoyed massage therapists when there are alternatives where they can get what they are looking for. I asked a friend who is a counselor in the sex positive community and he’s pretty savvy. He thinks that because there is stigma about sex work, that these guys go for less stigmatized interactions and hope they will get lucky. I can accept that as a plausible explanation.
As for why people get banned, it varies. One can ask; you might or might not get an answer. It might be for a serious offense or it might be because they were a habitual time waster, constantly contacting pros and engaging them in long conversations without ever booking an appointment. Not everyone who is banned is a predator but enough of them are.
Sex work is also not legal in most areas. Not sure why. What two consenting adults does should be nobody else's business.
Inclined to agree with @Mike403.
Thanks to the mods! And good job Tom Sawyering us into painting that fence for you, @Mark ! 😂 Seriously, though, this site would collapse without your hard work and the vigilance of the members, and I do hope more people step up to be mods.
I just want to say I’m grateful for the humans keeping this community safe and healthy and for being so dedicated in that.
But also the folks who report, because you’re the extra set of eyes, and in some cases people don’t speak up about site abuse etc. So for those of you who do, know you’re appreciated.
Anyone claiming to care about humanity should be reporting. Planet Earth will turn better if more people would think of others, that are strangers to them, as being as important as anyone.
I just realized I have a question. Should people whose profile pic portrays them obviously badly under the influence be reported?
@Mike403 - good point about the legality. It’s no less legal when it’s done under the guise of massage or cuddling but at least publicly what one is doing can appear legal.
@achetocuddle
Should people whose profile pic portrays them obviously badly under the influence be reported?
No. Not unless the photo breaches the terms of service in some way.
People are perfectly entitled to be under the influence if they want to be. And whether or not they are is something you can't tell from a photo. (You can guess, and you'd probably be right more often than wrong, but you can't actually know.)
People under the influence does not break TOS and is a pure guess if they are. Moreover, we are now getting into an area of moral judgement. If one thinks the picture looks like a person is under the influence and it shakes one’s sensibilities to their core, then don’t cuddle them. Other than that, don’t judge them if you do not know their circumstances or what was going on at the time of the picture.
Thank you for answering my question. I had begun to wonder if I was remiss because I was NOT reporting people obviously under the influence, even tho it's often not illegal. i was not concerned with the legality of it, I was just thinking a member that would post a pic like that might be trouble later. I just wanted to make sure I was doing the right thing by not reporting them.
Considering the number of profile photos that I look at, I can’t recall looking at one and thinking they are obviously under the influence of one thing or another. I don’t assume one can determine this from a photo. I do often look at people’s photos and wonder if they realize they are sabotaging their possibilities of finding cuddle buddies by putting up a photo of themselves that’s uninviting.
Thank you for answering @Babichev.
I apologize for my perhaps offensive question. I wish I would not have asked. I was genuinely concerned about doing the right thing. I will not think about reporting anything unless it is very blatant.
@achetocuddle - no problem. That’s what we’re all here for.
This site is for platonic cuddling only, please do not make reference to non-platonic websites. - Babichev
I'm just a bad bad lil' weebus!!!