@DaringSprinter - love your observations.
No, @dave31415, I ASKED you if you were neurodivergent, I didn't 'assume' anything.
If 'having an opinion' is synonymous with 'starting a fight' to you, then maybe you should just ignore everything I post and save yourself the hassle of interacting with me.
As for 'attacking' anyone- nope. I am entitled to disagree with someone's view, especially when I know that view to be not up to date with current understanding of autism and the way we perceive it. Maybe the US is behind the UK on that, I don't know, maybe there is a lack of understanding of what a 'spectrum' is. Either way, I find your accusation offensive.
@DeadGirlWalking , I know its late where you are, so I understand if I don't get response. So I have a close family member diagnosed on the Autism Spectrum. Like just this April. He is very young. My initial experience is it is a spectrum meaning no two diagnosis are the same. Like no two people are identical. That's why its referred to as an Autism Spectrum? And it / can fluctuate??
@Babichev: I am a little bothered by having the name of a eugenicist stuck on me... but the meaning of words changes, and all in all I think we aspies, the people who're alive today, outweigh a single dead Nazi collaborator.
We get to say what the word means, I figure. Not him.
I am neurodivergent but it’s really none of your business. I’ll share if I wish to. You need to understand that stating your opinion as if it is fact and correcting people for having different opinions does indeed come off as insulting and belittling. Psychology is an immature science. We really don’t have a grasp on the mechanism for most psychological conditions. So there is a lot of subjectivity and changing of opinions along professionals what is going on. There is nothing Mike is saying about the way he sees himself that is contrary to any firm scientific knowledge. He doesn’t need correcting.
Mike403 deleted his account.
@DaringSprinter What you said.
@OhioMike great question.
So, the majority of people think of a spectrum as a line, with extremes at either end, and varying degrees along the line. Autism Spectrum Disorder, if you were to draw it, would look more like a spider web, with a point in the centre (usually zero) and several lines coming off it, to make a spider web shape. These lines would refer to things like 'social skills', or 'sensory needs' or 'communication ability' or 'situational adaptability' and each person would be at different points on the lines, and so their 'webs' would look very different.
( @DaringSprinter would you mind adding a graphic to explain this better than I have described it? You're much better at the technology stuff!)
This is one reason why it's not very useful to use functioning labels, because it doesn't refer to a specific function. Someone can be very good at communicating, but not so good at situational adaptability. It means that one the one hand they are 'high functioning' (communication) but also somehow 'low functioning' (situational adaptability), which makes it sort of confusing.
It can also fluctuate, absolutely. People with ASD can learn new ways to handle situations, and can work on skills. People can also be set back by certain external factors, such as stress and trauma. My ability to mask disappeared almost entirely when my father died, for example, and I developed numerous involuntary 'stims' which looked like tics. This was a direct response to trauma, and as I processed the feelings I was having, my involuntary stims lessened and became more manageable.
Poor Mike. I hope he comes back. Going to have to do something about this.
@DeadGirlWalking ok this is good thank you. My family is still in "shock" part of all this. This is our first experience so just having conversation about this at family gatherings is in the unfortunate awkward stages. So fluctuate, like fluid? like recites ABC's one day, next day won't or can't. ?
I will pm you other questions so not to derail this thread. Thank you!!
@dave31415 what do you propose you will 'do about this'?
He's a grown man, he can make his own decisions, and right now he has decided to delete his account.
@OhioMike I'm not an expert, by any means, but it is possible that that could happen. We can talk about this more on PMs If you like, I'm reluctant to post much more on this thread for obvious reasons.
@DeadGirlWalking I would really appreciate a good link on masking, as the way you describe it sounds like how I have had to act in work situations. My ears also perked up when you mentioned developing tics...when I lost both of my grandparents, and was under severe stress at work trying to hide my depression, my eye started twitching continually, which had never happened, before.
~ Sunset Snuggles
@DeadGirlWalking: Hmm. This is simplified, but should be good enough as an introduction.
So, for instance, if my noise sensitivity were to be plotted as a dot on that chart, right now I'd put it more towards the center of the pizza—but if I get tired, or hungry, or stressed, or thirsty, or... then the dot will move closer to the edge, and sounds I would be fine with right now will cause me actual pain.
@DeadGirlWalking We have a moderation system and we don’t look kindly to cyber bullying. People with autism can be very vulnerable to criticism and constant social criticism. I’ll let them sort this out. They usually do a great job.
@DaringSprinter Thank you ,not only interesting in itself, but helpful to me personally.
Would love to know if anything else thinks I have 'cyber-bullied' anyone on this thread?
@dave31415: I agree that Mike's use of the terms "high functioning" and "Asperger's Syndrome" were just fine and didn't need correction.
I can also see how running across those terms could trigger a knee-jerk reaction—they have been used to do very unpleasant things. In particular, I can understand the desire to get rid of the whole high vs low functioning dichotomy. @DeadGirlWalking: I don't think you were bullying.
Personally, I hope @Mike403 is just taking a break again. I've needed to do that myself, a time or two.
@OhioMike: You're welcome!
@DarrenWalker thank you so much for the graphic, that's really useful ☺️
@SunsetSnuggles this page has a good explanation of what masking is, what it can look like, and why people may do it. If you want to PM me to discuss stims/masking I'm more than happy to talk about it with you.
https://www.healthline.com/health/autism/autism-masking
@DaringSprinter Mike deleted. He did not deactivate. I hope he comes back. I was barely friends with him but I can't stop crying. I'm glad you are so good at explaining things. I wish I could articulate like you. Nighty night.
I think I did have a reaction to the use of high/low functioning labels, but I reacted more to the constantly being told that what I know to be true, isn't true, and that I am wrong. People can have two different versions of things and they can both be the truth, and sometimes I (and apparently other people) forget that. I do feel talked over a lot in life, and I feel that people judge my knowledge or intellect because that have these preconceived ideas about my abilities, and that rubs me up the wrong way.
I hope Mike comes back when he's ready, but I don't take any responsibility for him deciding to leave for now. Like I say, he is an adult, and he is capable of making the best decision for himself at this moment in time.
@achetocuddle: After you delete your account, there's a period of... about a week, I think... when you can change your mind and reactivate. Hope remains. 🫂
Good night.
I don’t think anyone needs to identify publicly whether they are neurodivergent or not. It’s a personal matter. Don’t assume anyone is or isn’t.
I, too, hope @Mike403 changes his mind. He’s been here since 2017, longer than me. I hope he is reading this.
@DaringSprinter - what you said about the “A” name. I try to take my cues from the way people identify themselves. I was startled when I learned about the name and avoid it since then. Not everyone does.
This thread is coming dangerously close to being closed. Proceed with caution.
@DeadGirlWalking Thank you for the link, I just read it and will continue learning. I'll PM you soon about my experience.
@achetocuddle I've seen many people delete and then come back. As @DaringSprinter said, there's a window where they can undelete, and many utilize it. 🤗
Welp, I'm not going to be sleeping tonight 😣
@DeadGirlWalking Thanks for the moment of self reflection. I am sure there are reasons why you respond the way you do. Perhaps you can imagine how Mike feels as well. Maybe you can go back and look at how many times in this very thread where you told someone what they can or can’t say or that they are wrong. I think you will find that you did to others what you dislike far more times than they did it to you. That seems like a very objective way of seeing the point and maybe feeling some responsibility. Anyway, I’m not in a position of sorting those things out and I’m sure you’re not asking me too. Just might be a learning experience. I’ll leave that up to you.
@dave31415 I would prefer you did not tag or interact with me in the future at all.
Working in behavioral health-there is a stigma attached to “high functioning” & “low functioning” now. Not everyone is offended but there are strong voices out there in the universe now educating others on correct/socially acceptable terms they prefer.
Even the puzzle piece symbolism with autism. It’s a topic with colleagues about how it’s coming under fire for being offensive. The viewpoint on it, quoted by someone, to me- “I’m not a puzzle piece to figure out and I’m not missing any pieces”
I actually liked this whole thread, honestly. Seeing different perspectives, and viewpoints. This is my third favorite since joining the website. It encourages education, perspective, & sharing of personal experiences.
Enough.
I may or may not sort this later, but this bickering is done. Participants on this thread - do not be surprised by warnings or messages from me or the mod team over the next few days.