Do you have any tips to better my profile?

Dylan2693Dylan2693
in General

Hey cuddlecomfort,

A month ago, I posted this discussion about the overall negative experience I've had over the last 2 years on this website. In the end, I decided not to delete my account, that I would revamp my profile to have it passively display on this website, and to not give up just yet on here. One of the things mentioned in the discussion was that I should have more pictures and information on my profile, so I took some time today to adjust it and would like any (constructive) criticism that you have.

My profile link is here.

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Comments

  • [Deleted User]SoulParaTodos (deleted user)

    Well I like it because it’s straight up honest of what you like but, May I suggest something? You are heavy into gaming certain kind of movies. That is cool But perhaps you want to express other things which can attract a wider audience, because what you put here is very narrow.

    Maybe talk about emotions, people in general things you like that can reach out to peoples hearts

    Take it as you be in owner of a new store, and while people walked by your store front, which kind of people you want to attract, based on what you set up in the storefront

  • CuddleWhoCuddleWho

    I'm honestly curious - what is your motivation for continuing to try to meet women on this site? Out of all the places one could meet a woman - at a social location like a bar, through your social circle, via a social hobby like dancing, or on a dating app - I promise you CuddleComfort is by far harder than any of them.

    Look at this part of one of the weirdass replies you got to your other post:

    you are expecting to have this service provided to you for free

    This is the mentality a lot of women on this site develop. A man wanting to meet a woman on equal terms, for a mutually shared enjoyable experience (which is theoretically the main point of this site), is actually an entitled weirdo. The idea of a woman actually wanting to meet a man doesn't even compute for this commenter - the only reason a woman would meet a man is to be paid for "providing a service."

  • CuddleDuncanCuddleDuncan Mod

    Glad to see you back! :)

    Brilliant. Great profile. I second @SoulParaTodos's comments.

    Three tiny details, none of which are important.

    Lose the "af", it isn't necessary. If you want to say something, use a standard adjective like "hugely", perhaps modified "I can be hugely sarcastic"

    Delete the preferred days and times, they're not significant enough. You're not a person who can only do very specific times.

    Add a photograph that shows your whole body, head to toe.

  • Dylan2693Dylan2693

    @SoulParaTodos How would I talk about emotions in my profile? I'm open to putting something in my profile, but idk what I would put. Do you have an example?

  • achetocuddleachetocuddle

    I agree with @SoulParaTodos. Most people here, including the gamers, don't seem interested in gaming during a cuddle.

  • Dylan2693Dylan2693

    @CuddleWho I'm not sure why expecting this to be a mutually shared enjoyable experience is me being an entitled weirdo. I (assume) that women find comfort in cuddling too. There are women on here to make money, but not all. From the moment I found this website, nothing from the developers themselves gave me the impression that this website is for paid services only and that free services are never going to happen.

    I recognize that finding a cuddle buddy on here might never happen, which is why I'm going to not be fully active on here and only passively come on the website every now and then. I wanted to update my profile to at least give myself a 1% chance at a new cuddle buddy instead of a 0% chance.

  • CharlieBearCharlieBear Mod

    Welcome back!

    I feel like you don’t need to get into the specifics of what movies/shows/anime you like. I say that because if someone is reading your profile and they are not into those things, they may lose interest if they skip parts of your bio. Our cuddle partners could have literally nothing in common with us except the need to be close to someone, so I’d focus more on why you think you make a great cuddle partner and some reassurances that you are a safe person to meet.

    Please note that this is just my opinion and I am wrong most of the time 😅

  • Dylan2693Dylan2693

    @achetocuddle And I agree with that too, I was just trying to be me and give an honest description of myself. I added movies and tv afterwards because I know that more women would be into that than gaming, and I don't necessarily mind watching movies or tv, I just not a big movie buff because I like watching tv/movies with others instead of on my own.

  • Dylan2693Dylan2693

    @Charlie_Bear But how could I label on my profile that I'd be a great cuddle partner and reassure that I'm safe w/o looking like I'm trying to mask an underlying motive and manipulate a woman? Because I wouldn't be, but I feel like outright labeling that on my profile is exactly what a person with bad intentions would do too.

  • Dylan2693Dylan2693

    @CuddleDuncan I'm a bit of a cusser, so the "af" is just a little personality in there.

    I removed the days and added a group pic of myself.

  • achetocuddleachetocuddle

    Dear Dylan,
    You are so right that being authentic and honest is the way to go. And lots of people like to watch movies and TV during cuddles, so that can gain a wider audience. This next thing is kinda tricky, but you might want to add what you can offer during a cuddle; if not in your profile, then in the first message you send.

    My profile works for me, but I'm looking for a fairly narrow crowd and not trying to get a lot of cuddles. I suggest you read other female enthusiast profiles from all over to get an idea of what they are looking for that you can provide.

    Most people are Ok with being 420 friendly, including me, but if you mention in your first message that it is not important to you that might help. Not sure. Hopefully others will chime in on this.

    I'm just thinking of things that might expand your audience and make you seem more approachable.

  • CharlieBearCharlieBear Mod

    @Dylan2693 i know exactly where you are coming from because I think the same way. You don’t have to explicitly state you are a safe person, but rather tell us readers what you look for in potential cuddlers to feel safe yourself.

  • TheFunCartelTheFunCartel

    @Dylan2693 Keep the af in. It is what your generation uses, as do I more and more. Of course old farts will tell you to change it, but if you aren’t looking to cuddle the 60 and over crowd, af is suitable and casual af.

  • SunsetSnugglesSunsetSnuggles

    I think it's sweet, I would message you. I do agree that the specifics on movies/shows could be trimmed up a bit. I think including "af" and 420 is good because it accurately represents your personality, which will either draw similar people, or dissuade those who have an issue, both of which are good in the end. Your pictures are fun and friendly and I'd love to chat with you. 😊

    ~ Sunset Snuggles

  • CuddleDuncanCuddleDuncan Mod

    I think that's fair enough af. =)

    In regard to the emotion comment, you could try writing something about how you felt about something. Maybe something about what brought you here, or how you felt when you nearly deleted, or how you felt when you decided not to delete.

    As to the stuff about what makes you a great cuddle partner, you are quite right to avoid the looking like a predator stuff. But you could talk about maybe how you are very cuddly by nature, or how you are not at all cuddly by nature but you want to change that, or something.

  • achetocuddleachetocuddle

    Dylan,
    I do cuss a little, but saying you are sarcastic af doesn't make you seem approachable. If I were meeting you at this point, I would be Ok with it cause I feel I know where you are coming from now. But to read that in a profile....well, I would think maybe I should just keep looking. Being upfront is great, especially in my book, but admittedly I am not a conventional person. Your best bet is to try to appeal to more mainstream people.

    Lots of us don't want to be too vulnerable on the forum, and I don't think it's a good idea to be. If you are tender, a good listener, funny, etc. those are good things to mention. What do you hope to give and receive during a cuddle? Mention those things in your first message, if not your profile.

  • DaringSprinterDaringSprinter

    A brief note: I'm one of the rare forum posters who loves cuddling while gaming. We're out there!

  • CharlieBearCharlieBear Mod

    @DaringSprinter i have so many game consoles set up right where I cuddle. I need to try that!

  • achetocuddleachetocuddle

    @DaringSprinter is right. There are gamers here.
    Dylan, as you can see, the af is just a tiny detail, as @CuddleDuncan mentioned. I just saw the group pic you added; it's really good and makes you look friendly and open.

    I'm sure after reading this whole thread you see that part of it comes down to how much you want to cuddle people you have stuff in common with and how much you want to cuddle with a variety of people. I hope you get a bunch of cuddles.

  • desi_babedesi_babe

    Us women love it if you pay the pet tax (you say you have a cat - post a picture with your cat, or at the very least mention it in your About Me... but it's definitely better to post a picture of/with your cat). There's many reasons for why this works (shows you can provide safety for an animal, cuteness leads to small hormonal releases, etc), but it does work.

  • Dylan2693Dylan2693

    @desi_babe Yeah, I think I'll get a photo of us together on my profile. She's a cute long haired calico and is super soft to the touch

  • Dylan2693Dylan2693

    I just updated my profile's description again, and I'll be adding a picture of my cat and I later on.

  • zerocantaloupezerocantaloupe

    yesss, get those hormonal juices flowing

  • achetocuddleachetocuddle

    Your about me section was fine before, but your rewrite is really good. What you've written in both of your threads is good too. It's good exposure for you, I think :)

  • Dylan2693Dylan2693

    @desi_babe Profile now has exactly 1 cat in it

    @achetocuddle Thanks!

  • achetocuddleachetocuddle

    Exactly 1 cat. That's funny.
    I think some other members here who say they have trouble getting a cuddle might do well to follow Dylan's lead.
    His concerted effort and continued open willingness to better his profile is charming.

  • quixotic_lifequixotic_life

    @Dylan2693 ~ I can say that 100% of the best of cuddlers I've ever cuddled are all sarcastic AF!! And fwiw, when you've got bits in your profile that cast light on how you really are, the more likely you are to draw those who would likely make for compatible and repeat cuddle buddies (IMO).

    As far as the specifics of games, movies, etc... I wonder if it might flow well for you to put something like, "I've enjoyed playing __ and would like to share that with someone who is interested." or "Sometimes I enjoy playing ___ or ___. How about you? Are you a gamer? Do you have a favorite you'd recommend?" to not only share what you like, but to create a sort of opening for someone to step through.

    And/or do the same with movies (or whatever other interests you have).

    As a person who sometimes struggles with how to open a convo, having questions to potentially riff from really helps and they show you aren't locked into your own way of being too.

  • NickoliNickoli

    I'm glad you stuck around @Dylan2693. I saw the initial discussion and I shared some of the same feelings. It took me a long time to figure this site out. I'm still learning. I see a lot of great suggestions above and I'm absolutely going to incorporate a few. I think doing so on your end will only lead to more hugs. Good luck friend.

  • SCityCuddlerSCityCuddler
    edited August 2022

    @Dylan2693 Glad you left af, sarcasm and the word f*** belong together! I really dig your first sentence. The only advice I can offer is to lose the part below. Last thing you want is to open the door to a whiner man. You're cuddling to decompress, not stress.

    "If you ever want or need an open ear while we're cuddling, I'd be there for you too, as I've always enjoyed helping others when I can and offering advice when appropriate."

  • TNNativeTNNative

    Hi Dylan, I looked at your profile and I think it is good. I am a bit far away, but if closer I would consider striking up a conversation. And wile the profile is good, I think what I fine most appealing (other than the precious cat) if your ability to describe yourself and also your ability to hold conversation in this thread. So keep that in mind when you do communicate with a potential cuddle partner closer to you. For what it is worth, If someone is eloquent and able to hold conversation with me then that is a plus for both of us.

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