Latin Dancing and Cuddling

edited September 2022 in General

I think there are lots of similarities and lessons from the two activities:

  • close body contact
  • mutual accommodation and movement
  • intimacy
  • respect of consent and boundaries
  • fun
  • platonic

Differences:

  • dancing is more sexual but less intimate
  • cuddling is less sexual but more intimate
  • dancing involves music, rhythm, and set patterns
  • dancing is good for fitness and exercise
  • easier to find dance partners (maybe not a permanent partner though)
  • dancing takes at least a year to be proficient; we are born cuddlers
  • you can cuddle longer than you can dance

Any Latin or ballroom dancers? I like bachata, zouk, and kizomba. Ballroom dances that I like are the waltz and cha cha.

Comments

  • I’m a ballroom dance instructor so I know most of the dances. Salsa, Bachata, Merengue, Cha Cha, Rumba, Bolero, east coast swing, west coast swing, waltz, tango, foxtrot, Viennese waltz, quickstep, etc.. lol..

  • edited September 2022

    @DanceGuru Favorite one? Wow! Maybe someday I'll take your class. How much do you charge for your van remodels?

  • I’m down for cuddles and bachata 😌🎶

  • Difference: I don’t step on anyone’s feet or piss off the dance instructor when cuddling! 🤣🤣

  • Difference: I am capable of cuddling.

  • Ballroom dancer/partner dancer here! I love partner dancing for the body contact and communication you have between you and your partner. The best moments when dancing are when you feel completely in sync with your partner as you move across the floor as one.
    I think two dance styles that are really similar to cuddling are fusion (especially microfusion) and contact improv. These dances don’t have any set patterns and is all about moving in communication with your partner. While fusion has a lead and follow, contact improv does not. When I go to fusion and contact improv dances, cuddle puddles of dancers taking a break often form 😊. These dances on occasion can also feel as intimate as cuddling.
    I would disagree with dancing being more sexual though. Presentation-wise there is the performance of sexuality/sensuality, but it’s a performance rather than an inherent part of the dance. Perhaps within some social dance cultures there is more of a dating/hookup culture (those dances I tend to avoid). But most social dances I go to, people are there solely for the dance. I have absolutely no problem dancing dances that are may be perceived as sexual with a stranger.

  • edited December 2022

    I love Latin dancing!

    Other similarities:

    • men also push boundaries on the dance floor and confuse sensual dancing with an opportunity to pursue sex
    • oxytocin hit, but can happen even faster than cuddling!
    • some are better at it than others; it can very much be about the connection, but also skill and experience

    Differences:

    • you get to test the connection quickly, in public, in just 3 minutes!
    • most people say "yes" to a request to dance
    • the ratio of men (leads) to women (follows) is definitely in favour of men! Guys... if you want more physical connection with women, go out there and take some dance lessons! Even if you suck at it (and face it, you will for at least a year)... you will get to connect with other beginners who really want to dance!
  • [Deleted User]casualcomfortjo (deleted user)

    Dancer here! I completely agree. partner dancing/dancing in general helped me through the pandemic when we couldn't meet in close quarters to cuddle. Great activity to get physical contact needs and building connections with other dancers. It's easier to dance than cuddle with strangers. So I highly suggest everyone to find a ballroom or dance studio venue and get those feet moving!

  • Bachata, zouk, kizomba woo! I've been doing ballroom too. Great exercise too and improves coordination. I would say you can break a sweat in dance, but not in cuddling. You can cuddle longer than dance.

    @Fallstreak2 I would say bachata and zouk and maybe even Tango (haven't done it) have sensuality/sexuality built into it. It doesn't mean two pple will have sex, but the music and the dance welcomes a sexual connection as part of the dance.

  • @cylee1180 I would suggest changing the term to "sensual connection". I vehemently disagree that dance welcomes a sexual connection, and saying so just perpetuates the notion that it's natural for men to cross those boundaries because they've interpreted the signs to be inviting of such.

    Nothing welcomes sexual connection except explicit, enthusiastic, unquestionable consent.

  • Men ruin everything apparently

  • edited December 2022

    @xelda That's okay. It might just be a semantic difference.

    I've never crossed the line, but I do think not always but sometimes some of the dances are sexual by design. Thats my opinion and not hinting at breaking boundaries.

    Tango was a lower class type of dance and seen as super racy in its time.

    Bachata is about lust, love, and heart break. The lyrics and melodies express that and the dance too. The starting positions for bachata and zouk involve inner thighs rubbing together. I've heard the rumba compared to vertical lovemaking before.

    I was told by my kizomba teachers that men are recommended to put their belt buckles to the side bc it could irritate their partner. Now, that's close!

    I'm reviewing it in my mind...okay, perhaps it can be a sensual connection, with a sometimes sexual energy, and as an overall platonic activity. That would be my overall opinion.

    Oh, and it's fun as hell. :)

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