This is an uncomfortable feeling...

JBearzJBearz
in Pro Cuddling

Lately I've been thinking of becoming a professional cuddler, but at the same time I know that it would probably be a waste of money/time.

I'm sure it's been asked before, but are there any "successful" male cuddlers in existence? What's the client rate like? It sucks having the desire to be pro while simultaneously feeling like it wouldn't be worth it.

Also, are Pros required to cuddle "everyone"? That's another roadblock. I tried to be open-minded but I just really am not comfortable cuddling other men. But I feel like people would see something wrong with a "professional" cuddler who only cuddles one gender.

Thinking maybe I should abandon the idea altogether 🤣

Comments

  • teddybear888teddybear888

    @JBearz Never fault yourself for being true to your own boundaries & standards. Be true to yourself. That added strength & vibrancy to you will be recognized & respected. You do you and those who are on your frequency will come.

  • xeldaxelda

    Lucky for you, there's a whole thread dedicated to this question over here

  • JBearzJBearz

    @teddybear888 Those are very reassuring words thank you

    @xelda I realize the question has been asked already. Sometimes you want people to answer your specific question without having to sift through someone else's thread.

  • MelancholyMelancholy
    edited December 2022

    @JBearz there is something like 100 men for every woman who wants to cuddle here.
    So unless you're interested in cuddling with men which you apparently are not I wouldn't say your chances of having a lot of clients not being very high. But you won't know until you try.
    Just that the odds are definitely stacked against it.

  • SunsetSnugglesSunsetSnuggles

    @JBearz I don't believe Pro's are allowed to discriminate based on gender, so unfortunately if you are only comfortable cuddling women, you would probably want to stick with being an enthusiast.

    ~ Sunset Snuggles

  • JBearzJBearz

    @Melancholy @SunsetSnuggles

    Yep, that's what I figured. Probably won't see any clients if Im only willing to cuddle women. I used to have my preferences set to "everyone" until I started getting random guys messaging me 😅 so I guess it's the enthusiast life for me

  • Sheena123Sheena123

    This was brought up a few times and the creator of the site had this to say about it:

  • JBearzJBearz

    @Sheena123 Good to know indeed. It's weird that anyone ever recommended to report people for only cuddling a certain gender. I think it's completely natural to want to cuddle platonically with the opposite sex.

  • CuddleDuncanCuddleDuncan Mod

    Don't do it. You won't get anywhere.

    I don't mean to be discouraging, it's just the cold, hard reality. There will be a properly successful man cuddler one day, but it will be somebody who has a passionate commitment to helping others, and they will be utterly determined to succeed. And they will. (Whether it will be worth it in a business sense is another matter.)

    You are just wondering if you should give it a whirl. There's nothing wrong with that in and of itself, but history teaches us what happens to men who decide to give professional cuddling a whirl.

  • bobadevoteebobadevotee

    I just think it’s simply not professional to discriminate based on gender. The same way it’s wrong to discriminate based on race. You rationalize it by saying what YOU THINK is completely natural. Well, for reference, there are people who think it’s “unnatural” to mix races. Does that mean it would be okay for a cuddler to discriminate based on race? We should not go by our biases of what we think is natural when providing a professional service. You’re getting paid to do a job. For example, when I go get a massage, the masseuse will take clients of any gender. That’s professionalism.

  • Mike403Mike403

    @bobadevotee - This isn't like getting an oil change. Cuddling is an intimate activity and it puts somebody in a vulnerable position and if they don't feel comfortable with the other person for whatever reason, the session won't go well. I believe independent workers, as in not employed by anyone and are using this site as an outlet to find clients, should be able to choose who they do business with.

    As for if it's okay for a cuddler to discriminate based on race, there is literally an option to filter based on ethicality when searching for cuddlers.

  • bobadevoteebobadevotee
    edited January 2023

    @Mike403 that filter is for people searching for cuddlers. As a pro, I don’t have a filter function to search clients based on race. It’s simply unprofessional.

    This is a job. Massages are intimate. Waxing privates is intimate. Yet most folks I know in those industries are professional and don’t turn anyone away for race or gender. Rarely, I see a waxer refuse to wax male genitalia due to trauma and I do understand that because you’re directly dealing with a sex organ…and waxing isn’t supposed to be an explicitly sexual job.

    It’s unprofessional and morally questionable to discriminate when offering a service.

    Saying it’s fine because it’s an intimate setting sets a horrible precedent.

    I hate to bring up sex work, but you can see lots of parallels in pervasive racism being justified due to preference. Such as women and men of color only being able to have certain roles (usually exploitive and racist) in adult films, and white women charging double to perform with a black man in an adult film. It’s unprofessional. I don’t care if it’s intimate.

    Whether it’s cuddling, massage, waxing, or the adult industry, you as a pro are signing up to do intimate work as a PROFESSIONAL. That means not being discriminatory. That means not helping perpetuate sexism or racism or any other prejudice.

  • Mike403Mike403

    @bobadevotee - It's easy to discriminate on a service like this and I'm sure it happens all the time. A pro doesn't have to respond to any inquiry and they will never know the reason.

  • [Deleted User]ClubSamwiches (deleted user)

    @JBearz are you having success as an enthusiast?

  • Midnight01Midnight01
    edited January 2023

    Reported, reviewed, and removed, @Midnight01 - one, you're off topic. Two, you hypocritically accuse someone else of topics that are against the TOS and forum rules. You're one incident away from forum timeout - last and final warning. [Sid]

  • MelancholyMelancholy
    edited January 2023

    Pro cuddlers have the right to say no to anyone they want. I knew one white pro cuddler who says no to indian and black clients. She said she almost said no to me but took a chance even though she thought I might be indian. I'm only half indian by the way. but I have heard from more than one pro cuddler that many other indian clients don't use deoderant etc...so they were pleasantly surprised I did. I never know what to say to a pro cuddler who tells me that.
    LIke thanks??

  • Mike403Mike403

    A male pro who only cuddles women might as well just give the site a $20 donation every month.

  • sunnysideupsunnysideup
    edited January 2023

    @Mike403 It’s against the terms of service for a professional to discriminate based on race. Enthusiasts are allowed to, however. Sadly true about the part of evading racial discrimination - the pro can just not respond and no one will ever know the reason.

    @Melancholy if a pro cuddler told me they were willing to ‘give me a chance’, because I don’t fully look like the race they don’t like, I’d probably just leave. But I’m guessing perhaps you had already paid by that point.

    @CuddleDuncan sad but true, also. Men cuddlers who decide to give it a whirl will most likely get nothing. There is the odd profile here and there that has karma from enthusiasts, but either they got extremely lucky and happened to be in the area of a female looking for a male pro, or they cuddle both men and women and are able to get male clients. And you’re right it seems possible to be successful but also seems like a high effort low reward type thing so it’d be unlikely to happen inless someome REALLY cared about being a pro make cuddler above any other hobby in their lives.

  • safensecure4u2safensecure4u2

    I have been a pro cuddler for four years now. I cuddle everyone and have not had issues finding those who want to cuddle.
    I have several regular cuddle clients and enjoy the opportunities I have to meet and cuddle new people.
    I look forward to meeting many more and plan on continuing my Pro status.

  • Steven4444Steven4444

    @bobadevotee I have seen pro females only cuddle women, what are you saying about that?

  • OhioMikeOhioMike

    @Steven4444. I see by your profile you just joined CC. Welcome to the site and happy cuddling 😊

    We have moderators here who we can contact when you wish to report an issue such as the one you mention or see something that is against the TOS.

    Have a great Cuddle journey!

  • OhioMikeOhioMike

    …. And he’s gone ! Mods have super speed now ! 😄

  • MelancholyMelancholy

    I'm assuming he did something else besides simply disagreeing with the "popular" people. but we may never know what got him banned.

  • Mike403Mike403

    @Melancholy - Per a comment by @netrunner in the "why men have to pay for cuddles" thread, he was caught creating a duplicate account just to troll.

  • MelancholyMelancholy

    @Mike403 Oh! ok got it. I remember seeing that but thought it was someone else. Thanks ! :)

  • stormydaycuddlestormydaycuddle Mod
    edited January 2023

    Okay this came to mind and now I'm dying laughing. I'm so sorry. Hahahaha. Forgive me please. :) For the record not claiming to be just dying because word association made this pop into my head.

  • OhioMikeOhioMike

    @stormydaycuddle 🤣🤣🤣

  • OriginalirishOriginalirish

    I was a pro for a while, but never had a paid booking (Nobody paid me to book a session, I paid a lot to book with others)
    I actually earned some karma but I'm now an enthusiast so the karma does help.

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