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I don't think weight needs to be addressed ask what are some things she enjoys doing. Someone's weight doesn't limit what they are able to do in most situations.
Not sure why you think her being "overweight" would get in the way of holding hands and talking in really any situation.
Yes, I'm confused. What's the issue?
@Jpdad1099 just my opinion but if you have to bring up the topic of overweight in someone’s profile, it’s obviously an issue to you whether you say it isn’t it is. I can tell you from my personal experiences I’ve cuddled with all different body types and I’ve never been disappointed.
Tell her exactly what it is you want to do and ask her if she’s down for it, don’t assume that because she’s overweight that she can’t walk around the mall lol 😂
Ask here what she wants to do. She won't suggest anything that she is uncomfortable with or doesn't want to do.
I'm with @WriterGF .... not sure what the issue is. Do you think if someone is overweight they are incapable of walking?
I am overweight and have no issues with holding hands and walking at a mall. I think you are confusing overweight with incapacitated perhaps ...
Don't discuss her weight.
If your concern is not being seen as insensitive, don’t bring up weight EVER!
As others have said, ask if she would be interested in holding hands and walking around the mall. That’s it. She’ll tell you if she’s interested or not.
what 😭😭
I keep trying to come up with a response but I am drawing a blank. Being overweight is just not an issue. I mean look at @pmvines, who is fully capable.
@Mman right, I mean I can skip , hop, wave my arms , and turn myself from side to side just like you skinny folk. I also even went to the mall twice this week ! Got me these here bitchin shoes and pants to prove it !
Liking the shoes @pmvines Are those cock socks?
@pmvines Sounds like you do the Hokey Pokey real well. I really love the shoes, pants, and socks. You are one styling dude.
@Lisa123 you know your way to a mans heart with a mouth like that dontcha 😂
And yes they actually are 🙂
Haha! @pmvines I love wearing funky socks. Definitely have to find myself a pair of those!
Talking about weight isn't taboo @Jpdad1099 People are just sensitive in this age where positivity is valued more than logic. That being said you were probably better off simply asking her if she's comfortable walking around the mall with you instead of starting a fire in the forums lol Although I believe you did well to portray your respect.
I think you were being more thoughtful than harmful, but the inability to walk long/far depends on the individual and not all overweight ppl in general. For instance, Im sure a 200lb person can get around much easier than a 300lb person yet both are overweight. Also a person with a normal BMI may have old injuries that limit their ability to walk around as well. Just ask the person while avoiding mentioning their weight/handicap especially if you've just met.
Happy walking! 😄
I'm not judging at all - not you nor your wife, and not the person you're thinking of cuddling with. But IF it looks like the potential cuddler has a mobility issue due to weight, why not just ask them if they'd like to do something of their choice, and express it before a session. During that time if you'd like to just hold hands, lean on each other, snuggle a bit etc. and it doesn't feel right or doesn't meet your needs, then be polite and end it. Why make them perhaps self conscious of daily weight struggles by bringing up weight ahead of time?
Or perhaps be introspective and examine why you seek women who have the same weight issues as the one you are currently married to? Is there a conscious or subconscious reason you are attracted to overweight women? I mean that last part in a very respectful way - nothing wrong with being overweight, nor does it define beauty - but it can come with health and mobility issues. This website is a "rabbit hole" and has forced me to look at myself and question why, as a married man, do I seek physical comfort and reassurances with others. Who am I looking to have that connection with? Why do I want to cuddle with others? I have my reasons as do you. And as a dad I can understand a touchless relationship that you do not wish to leave, yet crave for more. That's my reason. Maybe it's yours, maybe it's not.
Nonetheless, whatever transpires, I sincerely wish you the best of luck finding physical and emotional comfort here or anywhere for that matter. We all long to feel loved, appreciated, valued, and comforted.
I can't speak for the person you want to snuggle with, but friendship, respect, and emotional availability are IMO the great components to any relationship....friendship or otherwise.
I think there has been some over reaction to the OP’s question. “Overweight” is a very ambiguous term that could be used to describe someone a little above a healthy BMI or significantly above a healthy BMI to the point where walking long distances might be tiring.
From the OP’s second comment about his wife being unable to walk around a mall, I think he was asking a very sincere question and wanting to avoid asking a cuddle partner to do something that might be physically challenging.
@Jpdad1099 - I agree with several of the comments above that the best way to proceed would be to clearly state what you would like to do and ask if she is OK with that. I also agree with the comments suggesting you NEVER bring up the subject of weight. Good luck and I hope you and your cuddle partner have a great time.
That was a weird question the OP asked. It is sort of like he thought? having a normal/typical/conventional convo with a overweight woman (such as the obvious suggestions in this thread) would automatically insult her or be over her head. This is a fascinating concept, if so. And this thread is super entertaining and hilarious. However, I do agree with @JohnR1972. I think he was asking a serious question. He may be so used to his wife's limitations, etc. that he did not think this thru.
I'm not saying the wife is a gaslighter, but I do know if you have lived with a gaslighter they can get you thinking normal is crazy/weird/wrong and vice versa. And it is very common for an overweight person to have trouble and dislike walking around a mall, so he may have defaulted to that thought.
And those socks are bitching @pmvines
@Jpdad1099 i love how sensitive you are to an internal factor that a lot of women face irrespective of weight and how much you want to invest in her comfort around those sensitive issues. I think it’s a testimony to you and the kind of person you are to be both aware and prepared so she has nothing to worry about when sharing time with you. It’s nice that you care like that, especially considering the culture of exclusion around weight in the intimacy world.
In regards to bringing it up, I don’t think it’s taboo at all to talk about it. I think it’s actually better to have open discussions on it, especially as you’re acceptant of her, no matter what her weight is. I think the only caveat should be that you let her be the one to bring it up should anything surface around it or if there’s anything she doesn’t feel comfortable doing because of it. Let her be the one to tell you why, and then you could open the doors to reassuring her and accommodating her on any alternatives she might feel more comfortable with. Otherwise, I think you should engage her as normal as you would anyone, and go forward with a clean slate until she redirects you otherwise.
In other words, let her lead on the sensitive issue and you can provide that comfort however it manifests itself following.