The Oracle of the Almighty Google found this study. With only 39 participants, it isn't rigorously scientific, but it matches my thoughts and experience
https://seeker.com/men-dont-read-online-dating-profiles-1765640256.html
I can only speak for myself. I read every word of a woman’s profile (pro or enthusiast) before contacting her. I will not contact anyone with less than 1 full paragraph in the about me section.
I probably message less than 10% of the women whose profiles I read because I see something that makes me feel like we would not be a good match for a cuddle.
Women don’t read just as much as men. It’s kind of a sexiest premise. Can’t tell you how many women tell me they want to host me.
If a woman actually bothers to write something in her profile, I read it. Why not first ask "Do woman actually write anything but useless fluff in their profile?"
@kinny I could see that. I’m not on other sites, so I can only go by my experience here.
@JohnR1972 Same. I always read someone’s profile before responding and prefer profiles with at least a few sentences.
@ca2md How is it sexist? I only get messages from men and have no way to know what women are doing or not doing in people’s inboxes.
@GreatHornedOwl Not talking about fluff. Talking about logistics like location, days available, etc.
I can respond from my very own personal experience. I’ve noticed that just about every request I get is asking to connect on days that I do NOT have annotated in my profile as days I’m available. We exchange multiple chats in the get to “know you a bit” phase where I’ve shared even more specifics about the time/days I can meet and STILL I’m asked for times & days outside of what I’ve explained. This makes me feel that one of two things happened. One, they didn’t even bother to read my profile. Or two, they read it and have decided to gloss over the parts that they feel can be subject to change if they ask. Typical behavior.
Never . I see boobs and just get to typing
I always read them and I really like it when they have written something. I also appreciate it when they read mine. I’ve often booked with pros who never visited my profile. So, I assume they haven’t read what I wrote.
Reading a profile is part of the vetting process for me, I read it entirely, flip through the pictures, the imagery and written profile gives me a sense of whether the person is a cuddler, fun, has good energy, I then like to follow it up with a call, hearing a voice says someone is real, you get a jist of personality and sense of how well we communicate and if we vibe and click. All are litmus tests of the vetting process, When I joined I read all the rules, terms, and perused through the forums from the beginning, I try to stay pretty current with them also, im glad to be part of this community. It makes the world a little smaller. 😊
Before I message—yes. That’s part of how I figure out if I want to message or not.
There are those shallow ones that merely look at a photo and then start messaging. I mean look at @pmvines. LOL
I construct a response to every potential cuddler based on their profile even if it's blank. This has resulted in my helping construct a profile, video conferencing and yes, cuddles.
Not even once honestly.
@Mman shallow as a kiddie pool thats been left in the hot sun for several weeks . Yet somehow I manage to get cuddles. Go figure .
I would say that most men look at pictures. I read profiles because I look for exclusionary factors (theirs or mine).
I would also say that it is my experience here that pros don’t read profiles-I explicitly say in my profile that pros just aren’t for me, but the vast majority of messages I receive are from pros I have never interacted with and are thus in violation of TOS.
Men are largely dopes on sites that pair us with women. We need to be better at this.
@natickben I totally glossed over that part of the TOS, thanx for mentioning it. Went back & found it.
Miscellaneous 26. You agree to not initiate communication with our members unless you have reason to believe they will be interested in your services. Our membership includes enthusiasts (free) and clients. The website is designed for clients to reach out to professional cuddlers.
@KaeK Exactly. That happens to me too.
@natickben I don’t ever get messaged by pros. But I don’t think there are many male pros. Like your profile, by the way.
@SonoraSam Same. I read the profile of anyone who messages me.
Quite a few women don't keep their bio updated. There has been a few women lately that aren't pros but after messaging they say that they charge
I would say half half Most of them only check pictures, I always have to kindly remind them by —— “ Hi , thanks for reaching out but I would like to know if you had read my profile first before we talk about availabilities ?” 👈 it became one of my copy & paste message in my notes 📝 😅
Though I don't send much, I always read profiles before messaging, no question. Though I admit a lot of my initial messages haven't displayed this so that's on me.
I’m a guy and I read profiles.
I read every word in a profile for a cuddler in which I have interest, and I'll read it again and again prior to making a request or the actual cuddle if we make a connection. There are some here who firmly believe that most people lie in their profiles, so reading them is a waste of time. To me, that exhibits a negative, glass-half-empty bias. I believe people are mostly genuine. Yeah, that's burned me on occasion, but I refuse to go thru life wearing battle armor. Like you, I had no idea that there were untagged pros out there, but I almost always book with known pros, so there ya go. Best wishes to you.
I read profiles. I must say, although I do understand wanting to get some essential things about yourself in your About Me section, I think it should be limited to highlights about yourself ( personal interests, education,hobbies, profession, etc) And deal breakers for potential clients/ cuddle partners ( boundaries, things you don't like, like smoking , maybe) I find it obnoxious when people post epic length multi paragraph content on their description and then expect you to reference it when you reach out to them. I AM a reader and I am not lazy, but I am somewhat offended by this. It's like you are already asking this huge time commitment from someone you don't even know yet.To those folks, I say if you are really so intelligent and possessed with so much depth, then you should know that a short, well constructed paragraph can be very illuminating. Most of these turgid About Me sections are redundant and superficial. Cultivate your editing skills instead of asking others to slog through a bad, self indulgent novella. End of rant. ☺️
I often get messages that reference very specific things in my profile, so I know quite a few men are reading my bio, which given the length of it, says something!
It's unfortunate so many do not. 😑
Here's a thought. 🎉🎉🎉🎉
save EVERYONE some time ....if people took the time to read/listen to others before bulldozing into someone's inbox expecting whatever you think you deserve, you might actually get the results you're looking for.
We live in a day and age of rapid depreciation of the human experience. If you think it's a normal thing to do in society, you're right.
If you think it's normal to treat others like they're second to your needs... That is not okay.
BASICALLY:
If you can't read a profile, I don't think we are going to be a good fit. Because if you're going to ignore a profile and my words, the chances you'll ignore my boundaries increases that much more. 🙌
@MissAdventurous great idea. If they don’t read your profile, it’s a res flag and they’ve filtered themselves out, saving everybody the trouble.
As a former pro, I always read the profile first. There are quite a few on here that do not, though. I remember when I started up, I didn't know that I should approach enthusiasts differently than a pro. I knew that enthusiasts don't charge, but I would send a message with a little about me and a written request with my interest in cuddling. I've since learned better and try to get to know enthusiasts before asking for a cuddle. All things considered, everyone is different and will react differently.
I ask every potential cuddler to read my whole profile. Sometimes they’ve said, your photos tell me all I need to know. Then they want to schedule same day, I don’t. In my experience, the boundary pushers are the ones who have actually admitted they don’t read forums or any other valuable information the site provides. They say they have no time or interest That tells me they don’t want to know what Platonic Cuddling/ Touch Therapy is and seem to want to ignore the rules. Also lately I’ve been asking, Do you understand the difference between Cuddling as sexual foreplay and Cuddling as healing touch therapy?
@MissAdventurous 👏👏👏👏
I think that a lot of men just hate to read. You might have to put your profile in comic book style with lots of pictures to attract their attention.