Higher risk of catching a cold?

CuddleButtLOLCuddleButtLOL
in General

Earlier this month, I had a cold for a week, and avoided cuddling and social events during that week. Recently, I booked a session with a popular traveling cuddler, they can cuddle four people a day during their trip (they list the time slots in their description). After I thought about it overnight, I canceled: I was worried I’d be at higher risk of catching another cold. But now I’m having second (or third) thoughts. It’s also said that cuddling strengthens the immune system (and “literally kills depression”).

Maybe it’s the same risk as being in an indoor restaurant talking with four people. Does a physical embrace add additional risk? I should ask jiu-jitsu people, they grapple with multiple people during training sessions. Maybe I’m less likely to recatch a common cold after having had it? If a cuddler is hosting four people a day, should I request they change the sheets before my session? Maybe it’s lower risk than cuddling with a person whose dogs sleep in their bed at night (maybe dog germs can cause a skin rash, but not a cold?). Maybe the answer for me is, shower both before and after each session (only one session a day for me). What do you think?

Comments

  • [Deleted User]MaverickLegend (deleted user)

    You could wear a hazmat suit while cuddling

  • TheFunCartelTheFunCartel

    Don’t overthink things so much that you miss out on life. I travel all the time and I haven’t had a cold in ages. You should always shower for a session and so should any partner. That is basic hygiene.

  • [Deleted User]SnugglesRus (deleted user)

    I agree with @FunCartel …. Take what precautions are reasonable and live as much life as you can. Connections and cuddling are so beneficial to our health in every way. Enjoy all the cuddles!! 💫

  • GrayMatterGrayMatter

    Are we denigrating Howard Hughes? Lol

  • [Deleted User]natickben (deleted user)

    So the short answer is yes: close proximity to people to n creases your risk. Close proximity to someone who is regularly in close proximity many other people increases your risk because THEIR risk is increases.

    But that (unless you have some underlying condition) may not be your prime consideration. There are things you can do to litigate your risk: showering is important for a lot of reasons but probably doesn’t decrease this risk. But you could wear a mask, for example, and probably more importantly ask your partner to wear a mask if this risk is important to you.

  • cuddlefaerycuddlefaery

    First, I apologize that this is so long, but this is a topic I feel strongly about and been heavily impacted by. I hope people find value in what I share.

    I'm going to preface this by saying I am not a doctor, but I do know a heck of a lot about the immune system because I have a primary immunodeficiency - in short, my body does not make adequate antibodies to fight off infections like upper respiratory infections (sinus infections, strep, pneumonia, RSV, etc.), among other cascading effects.

    The immune system is complex and is going to vary widely from person to person due to dozens of different factors - their genetics, childhood, hygiene practices, diet, exposure profiles (how many germ pools they're exposed to), etc. For some, having more exposure means their immune system becomes "stronger" and primed to more quickly recognize and deal with invading infections. For others, like myself, more exposure just means more illness because the body simply cannot recognize and fight off the infection before symptoms occur.

    Each person needs to decide their own risk profile and comfort zone. It can help to talk to your healthcare provider to decide how at risk you are for recurrent infections, and what precautions to take to avoid them that could help you personally, as each person may have different needs. For instance, no amount of vitamins, exercise, or other usual immune boosting practices is going to replace my missing genes or increase my antibody production. For me, my best protection is maintaining my regular plasma treatments, keeping my exposure profiles reasonably low, and practicing good hygiene.

    Thanks to the pandemic and the extreme isolation it brought (having a lack of immunity to pneumonia during a pandemic of a virus that causes pneumonia has been FUN sarcasm), I've had to learn how to balance safety vs actually living my life. Touch is my primary love language and the lack of it definitely did a number on my mental health. Cuddling with its close contact, shared airspace for extended period of times is inherently going to be higher risk, so each of us has to decide not only how often we feel sade taking that risk but with whom we feel safe trusting in out space. For most healthy people it's not something they even think about or register - for people like me it's something I have to carefully consider before every meeting.

    🌻Tl;dr - everyone's risk levels are going to be different and ultimately you have to take calculated risks if you want to live life rather than let fear keep you from experiencing it.

    If anyone has questions about my condition, the immune system, how to mitigate risks, or just wants to vent their own similar experiences - my inbox is gladly open 😊

  • pmvinespmvines

    Yes , of course close physical contact puts you at higher risk of airborne illnesses . No, it doesn't mean you should avoid contact and live in a bubble.

  • cuddlefaerycuddlefaery

    Here are some resources that might help with context and perspective when deciding your own risk comfort level, though again it's always best to consult a healthcare provider who knows your health history as well.

    A fantastic, fun video that explains how the immune system works and fights infections in easily understandable terms -

    The oft cited study where it was shown that frequent platonic touch in the form of hugging is protective against colds, most likely due to lowering stress levels -
    https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4323947/

    Some tips on how to lower your risk of infection with colds (and other respiratory infections) - https://www.cdc.gov/features/rhinoviruses/index.html#:~:text=You can help reduce your,school and adults miss work.

    A great article that dispells some myths on how to improve immune function and instead offers reliable alternatives with links to the research to back it up (assuming one is an average healthy adult) - https://www.health.harvard.edu/staying-healthy/how-to-boost-your-immune-system

  • MissAdventurousMissAdventurous
    edited February 2023

    Perhaps also, to minimize exposure with a professional that travels and has multiple clients, to book as an earlier client in their visit to your area to minimize that exposure. 🤗

    Masks are encouraged naturally, I still wear mine traveling just because I don't even want the common cold. lol lol dang kids sneezing everywhere.... 😂😂

    Edit: I do this when I get pedicures for other reasons too .... I don't like waking up early but no one has time for athlete's foot or worse.
    Statistics for you. 😂

  • CuddleButtLOLCuddleButtLOL

    Thanks for all the great ideas, and especially @cuddlefaery for the brutal warzone video on the immune system (lol), and the other links … I’ll focus on basics like hand washing, and not touching my eyes, nose or mouth.

  • supadupasupadupa

    Don’t risk catching a cold, don’t cuddle! You might cough and sniffle for a few days it’s not worth it, very, very dangerous

  • ohnonotagainohnonotagain

    Here is another agreement with @FunCartel. I mean, no one wants a cold, but they aren't that bad. Living life with perfect circumstances 100% of the time is great and all, but you will definitely miss out on lot of even better things. Sometimes a little risk has a high reward. Though personally, I would probably run it by the cuddler and ask if they were ok with me just getting over a cold. They are just as much at risk as you my good homie.

  • Carrie_AnneCarrie_Anne

    I’ve never been a germaphobe. I grew up in 50’s and 60s and that wasn’t a thing. I also rarely get sick. I seem to have a good immunity because of this.
    Drs now encourage parents to expose their kids to germs to build their immune system.. Getting out and experiencing life keeps you young and healthy!
    Of course common sense hygiene is always necessary routine.

  • WestsideMarcWestsideMarc

    (I’m commenting on this under the context or umbrella of the possibility of catching a cold ONLY - and not Covid related)

    Having said that, I know I should think twice before posting something snarky here, and I’m sure I’m gonna get some backlash from some overly sensitive person but come on, seriously???

    Life isn’t perfect. Life is messy! Don’t operate your life out of fear of catching a stupid cold!

    Moreover, after reading your profle you’re exponentially more likely to get a cold from your swing dancing! I mean you’re most likely in a hot room with you and your dance partner, exchanging elevated cardio breathing in each other face, everyone touching their sweaty hands and cross contaminating dancing with everyone else. And you’re worried about catching a cold from cuddling?

    Listen, my friend, I’m honestly not trying to be aggro or rude, but with all due respect, grow a pair and
    LIVE YOUR LIFE.

  • [Deleted User]WriterGF (deleted user)

    Before mocking the OP, maybe ask why this is something they are so concerned about? Maybe they are related to someone who is immuno-compromised, elderly or otherwise more at risk from the effects of even a cold? Maybe colds just hit them harder? I know people who don't worry about flu for themselves but get a shot every year because they are around a diabetic all the time and don't want them to catch it.

  • cuddlefaerycuddlefaery
    edited March 2023

    As someone who is immunedeficient, thank you @WriterGF . I get so tired of the "it's just a cold/flu!" argument. "Just a cold/flu" can and does land people like me in the hospital with pneumonia every year, and that does not take into account the added risk of RSV this year that has not yet subsided.

    And re: swing dancing, @WestsideMarc - hi, dance teacher here! You don't know what precautions may be in place with the studio or that OP may be practicing. Perhaps they are only dancing with one partner, not swapping, social distancing, masking, in well ventilated areas, etc. Also, sweaty hands are not more likely to "cross contaminate" unless you're constantly rubbing your nose and mouth, which would be terrible dance etiquette and no one would want to dance with you. Your face in or around someone else's face for an extended period of time during cuddling is far more likely to cause exposure to airborne viruses than by hand-to-hand or fomites if one practices good hygiene.

    Please stop belittling and mocking someone's health concerns just because you aren't concerned. Not everyone is so lucky to have a perfectly functional immune system, or they have loved ones that must take extra care during higher transmission times. Yes we must live our lives, but that doesn't mean be reckless or dismiss others concerns or safety protocols.

    It's really freakin hard to "LIVE YOUR LIFE" when you are constantly sick, in and out of the doctors, having to take heavy antibiotics and accumulating lung damage, all because inconsiderate people go around exposing everyone else because "it's just a cold/flu".🙄

  • [Deleted User]WriterGF (deleted user)

    @cuddlefaery Well put. As a diabetic, any illness that interferes with my ability to eat on a regular schedule -- even just a stomach virus -- can mess up my BG. You're never going to be immune to these sorts of things, unless you live in a bubble, but you don't need to go out of your way to catch them either.

  • WestsideMarcWestsideMarc

    Then he should’ve mentioned that for context. Re-read my first paragraph.

  • cuddlefaerycuddlefaery

    @WriterGF exactly. If you remember Bubble Boy (lol), that's me... I don't make antibodies, specifically to upper respiratory infections, with bacterial pneumonia being the most problematic one that I usually develop 4-6 times a year without any extra help of, you know, a global pandemic that causes pneumonia 😂

    I can't live in a bubble, can't stay home 24/7, and treatments since diagnosis have gone a long way towards allowing me to lead a more normal life. But that still doesn't mean I need to take careless risks or that I can tolerate those around me doing so. It's all about balance, as with everything in life, and my balance just looks different from what a "normal healthy" person's looks like 🤷🏻‍♀️ it's given me way more empathy towards other's health struggles as well because I know mine could be so much worse without modern antibiotics and things like n95 masks. People tend to forget how precious good health is and how lucky they are to have it until they suddenly don't have it any more.

  • [Deleted User]WriterGF (deleted user)

    @WestsideMarc Why? OP was asking a simple question. They are under no obligation to share their medical history with a site full of strangers.

  • WestsideMarcWestsideMarc
    edited March 2023

    Context is everything. The question was poised under the umbrella of catching a cold only. My response is under the assumption of no other info and I don’t buy the dance response. I’m not gonna sit here and get an Internet battle so everyone can just move on with whatever the responses would be to him...

  • cuddlefaerycuddlefaery

    @WestsideMarc why does OP need to disclose their personal medical history to avoid being mocked for having concerns?

    And had you read previous comments in this thread, you would have seen they had already stated they were going to focus on general hygiene practices and had thanked those that had responded - implying that they were already feeling less concerned and had an action plan.

    "I’m honestly not trying to be aggro or rude"? That is exactly what you intended to be, as evidenced by you passive-agressively referring to people as being overly sensitive and suggesting that someone showing concern for health is somehow less of a man by needing to "grow a pair". That's not snark - that's insults, and you and we know it so why pretend?

  • AngelPendavezAngelPendavez

    @cuddlefaery I wholeheartedly agree. And I’m so sorry for your difficulties <3 My risk profile is probably significantly lower than yours.

    Not making antibodies specifically for upper respiratory infections? You must’ve been a nervous wreck when this all started.

    I was extremely careful when everything happened. I used to be in and out of hospitals multiple times a year with infections, so I definitely didn’t want to land myself in a hospital when they were overwhelmed with covid patients.

    I ended up getting Covid sometime last year. It was awful while it was happening and it took over 2 (possibly 3) weeks for me to fully recover, but I did survive! And it wasn’t as bad for me as I might’ve expected. Since then, I feel a little more confident.

    I’ve only just begun to even start looking to meet up with people again after over three years on this site. Before I just didn’t see fit to take the risk. And even now that I open to meeting people again, risk assessment and planning in and of itself takes so much mental energy ~

    I truly envy the strong and healthy individuals who don’t have to think about such things. ^^

  • cuddlefaerycuddlefaery

    @WestsideMarc what part of the dance response did you not buy?

    If you mean the part respiratory viruses being spread more by close contact breathing than by touch - all the research done on COVID-19 shone a light on the fact that this was true for the viruses that cause colds and influenza as well, as masking dramatically decreased the number of cases and spread of upper respiratory infections. https://www.science.org/doi/10.1126/science.abd9149

    If you mean about it being poor dance etiquette to be constantly wiping one's nose and then touching a partner - I mean, that'd probably ick most people out in general not just in a dance setting, but here's one example from a dance etiquette poster:

    And if you mean about some locations or OP following pandemic/infection spread protocols - it's going to vary by locality and even by studio. Personally, I go by local health department guidelines on what I require of my dance students, but I always tell them to do what they are most comfortable with if they wish to do more as far as protection goes. Sometimes, even pre pandemic, I mask and don't do close contact because flu rates are high. Some of my students have not stopped masking because they are unable to vaccinate and are either high risk themselves or have a family member who is. I do not judge them for taking the protection steps they and their doctors feel is necessary for them to still be able to participate.

  • AngelPendavezAngelPendavez

    But to address your post OP, if showering before and after a session feels right, I say go for it. The first shower for their protection, and the 2nd for yours makes sense to me. Even just a good face and hand wash afterwards might be enough. Drink lots of water and moisturize well to keep your skin from drying out <3

    @carrieanne My 1-year-old nephew seems to be embracing this. Any food we give
    him, he holds and observes for a long time
    before finally putting in his mouth. But without hesitation, he’ll lick the floor and the bottom of shoes any chance he gets xD I wanted to take him the park and let him eat a little dirt, but his father wasn’t completely onboard xD

    I often wonder if my parents being such clean freaks contributed to my immunity being what it is ~ Who can say? We try our best, it’s all we can do ~ ^^

  • cuddlefaerycuddlefaery

    @EarthlyAngel003 yeah, the first 18 months or so were nerve wracking to say the least as there was zero data on how people with my rare disease were faring with the virus, and then how we were responding to the vaccine. For the first 9 months I didn't leave the house at all except doctors appointments, had everything delivered, didn't see family or anything - it was just considered too much a risk. We still don't know how well (or not) I've responded to the vaccines but at least now the antibodies are present in my regular plasma treatments to offer me protection. I'm actually more concerned about RSV and influenza right now 😅

    But offering hugs if you're feeling huggable - I've knocks on wood managed to not get COVID thus far because I've been so isolated, though I continue to get pneumonia at my usual rate. I only started getting back out in public mid last year, and only started cuddling again in January this year. To say I've been touch deprived is an understatement haha. I imagine you're facing much the same logistical difficulties as I am, and resistance from those not willing to "go back" to stricter protocols in order to meet with us. I hope you get the much needed cuddles you deserve! 🤗💖

  • stormydaycuddlestormydaycuddle Mod

    @cuddlefaery I'm terrified for you. Hopefully, a cuddle partner with unexpressed symptoms doesn't get you sick. I'd be scared to be responsible for that as a partner. The guilt alone. Hope you're doing well now at least. Hugs.

  • cuddlefaerycuddlefaery

    @stormydaycuddle I'm doing well enough. This winter has actually been one of my best because I've been so isolated with other heath stuff 😂 knock on wood, no pneumonia in more than 8 months, a record for me I think. The plasma treatments go a long, long way to improve quality of life - modern medicine is amazing.

    One of the things I was hoping would come from the pandemic, which has happened to some degree, is that people would become more aware about exposing high risk people to infections. Unfortunately until work places start offering better sick day/pay policies it's unlikely people will be able to stay home as much as they need to, but at least hand hygiene is more prominent and masking is now socially acceptable in the U.S.

    Pretty much I just ask people to let me know if they are experiencing cold/flu symptoms the day before or the day of seeing me to inform me so I can make my own informed choice on how I wish to handle things. Sometimes it might not change anything, sometimes it may mean we move outdoors or I mask, or sometimes I may ask to reschedule. But at least by people telling me I have a choice. This time of year in NorCal it can get tricky with allergy season kicking in, but overall I try not to stress about it too much. I have my infection protocols to help protect me - ultimately I'm responsible for myself, I just need help from others making sure I can do so effectively.

  • stormydaycuddlestormydaycuddle Mod

    @cuddlefaey makes sense.

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