@SunsetSnuggles - The word "professional" only means that they get paid for it. Some join thinking it's gonna be easy money. They usually don't last long. Weeding out all the men who is looking for more than platonic cuddles is a skill.
@Mike403 Agreed. Except on the word "professional". I looked it up to be sure and technically it's supposed to be one's "main" occupation. But in regards to behavior, this definition is why I was feeling compassion for the OP: "worthy of or appropriate to a professional person; competent, skillful, or assured."
~ Sunset Snuggles
@SunsetSnuggles In the same breath any member can sign up here unvetted where they are free to harass, stalk, and assault members until they are banned and slip in under a new username to repeat the same song and dance.
It's only a matter of time before many pros find their patience wearing thin and their customer service / professionalism goes south. Can't say I blame them. There's always new pros who are still navigating the site, trying to figure out how to screen, have had bad experiences that may lead them to cancel sessions or ignore their inbox entirely.
I also pay attention to usernames and the OPs is an odd choice for a CUDDLING site. 🙄
I think this could be a site improvement : having tiers of names for those who charge to cuddle. I think the 'pro' status should be earned over time, because yeah, there are many 'pros' on here who don't act very professional at all. Maybe freshman, sophomore, junion, senior and pro status.
@MrAdmirer - Just look at their karma. That should give you a rough idea.
.
I prefer to be called a "paid cuddler."
For all questioning the username and lack of photo. The username is homage to my favorite wrestler from the 90’s, Bret “The Hitman” Hart and the date I started dating my wife. And I’ve never added a photo as everyone always asks for one if we start talking. Sorry if I “offended “ any of the high and mighty. LOL. I’ve been off of social media for so long I forgot this is how people converse when not in person. To those not offended and have sent me private messages, thank you. Your encouraging words h e meant a lot as I go through this rough time in my life.
@Mike403 consider yourself unblocked. It’s a defense mechanism.
@Mike403 I'm not talking about how a cuddler can tell a pro based on karma. Especially since all cuddlers start with 0 karma so we can't judge on karma alone.
I'm talking about brand new users having the same pro status as someone who really IS a pro by being here and earning the title. I think these new cuddlers having the pro title given to them by default and then not acting like a "pro" is what ticks off a lot of potential customers and causes them to make these kinds of topics complaining about their behavior. It sets the bar maybe a bit too high and unfairly. Paid cuddler is a also a better way to title them as @AllAboutSoul has stated. I think I've mentioned that before as well in another topic.
Something as simple as different naming conventions could very well reduce the number of these complaint topics. I'm sure a lot of new pros get overwhelmed quickly.
@mj37 @MrAdmirer amazing how quickly I got rude replies though. Thank you for being so friendly on a site meant for healing. Be blessed.
@hitman_12596 sorry that people jumped to conclusions on you. I hate that it happens on here too. Glad you got some DM support.
@MrAdmirer - My point still stands. If they have a lot of good karma, chances are they are an experienced pro.
@jplemmon - Some criticism is helpful. It's his username in this case. It can be changed. Someone will the name "hitman" is more likely to receive no or negative responses.
@jplemmon thank you so much. Very kind. Patience is a virtue that I need to become one with.
@Mike403 right, and your point has nothing to do with mine.
@MrAdmirer - I have no idea what you're trying to argue. We don't need to give people different titles to dictate how experienced they are when the karma does that. When they first join, they have no karma = no experience.
Move on…. It’s nothing personal but move on to the next pro.
Many of the pros have active lives and cuddling is for fun when they can.
I have written to pros and received a response two months later.
I strive to reach out ahead of time like a week, possible follow up if we chatted, and if unable, then I move on. I avoid sending multiple messages
Ohh myy... 😒
@hitman_12596 you pose a question that honestly doesn't really have an answer . And your question isn't really a question but more so a reaction to something that bothers you about something in which there is no real solution to, only debate . What I see are people responding to your post with honest feedback,.and you are calling them mean and rude because why? I'm not sure what exactly you're looking to accomplish with that.
@hitman_12596 - It doesn't matter where you got your username from. It can give negative vibes to somebody who doesn't know anything about you.
Enough harping from the same 2-3 people on the same excuses. The things that everyone else about this site, cable professionals that are not professionals at all are the ones that make the most sense.
Now I know, and knowing is half the battle. Go Joe!!!
@Mike403 yes, it is quite obvious you have no idea what I am trying to argue and ironically you are making my point by calling out the OP who uses the name hitman. You say it gives negative vibes.
Well, when a cuddler who is labeled as a "pro" does not reply to message or otherwise act in a business "professional" manner it is obviously giving off negative vibes based on the amount of complaints we see in the forums. Some of you guys in this community defend the pros too much...some of the potential customers DO make valid points. They are not ALL just whining here. and I'm the first guy to call those guys out and defend the pros.
The way to become a "pro" cuddler here is to simply request it, or in the case of us men to pay a monthly fee (which is insulting, IMO). The title is not EARNED at all. Not all pros are equal, and a lot of them never really earn this title at all. I would almost argue that it does a disservice to the fantastic pros we do have out there to lump everyone together.
I'm simply looking for a solution that would result in less noise on the forums. You can keep trying to defend it all you want, but it is very obvious to me that the title of PRO is problematic and continues to be, right or wrong.
@MrAdmirer - Even well established pros such as @Rezz said she wouldn't respond to a person with a name like that. All pros have their safety to look after. If they are feeling uncomfortable in any way, it's easier for them to not respond at all. We are trying to give suggestions on how to seem more inviting. Also, since he unblocked me, I read his profile. It talks about needing a friend and having a texting buddy. Maybe a dating site would be better suited for him.
@Mike403 look, you fail to see my point so just drop it so the topic isn't totally derailed. It should die out anyways. This is not first time we've gone back and forth on threads, too. I have nothing against you personally you but we clearly don't see things eye to eye. It's all good though, it just is what it is.
@hitman_12596 some more advice. This was news to me but based on a different thread, whatever you do, do NOT send a message that says "Hi" or "Hey". This apparently can generate quite the negative response
@MrAdmirer While I believe I see your point -- that people see the word "professional" and expect a certain level of behavior -- by a strict dictionary definition, the word applies. Webster's defines a professional as "engaged in an activity for financial return." That seems to be the way the word is used here.
That said, there are professionals in every walk of life who engage in unprofessional behavior -- that can reflect badly on them or their industry, but if they are being paid for what they do, they are still considered to be a professional.
I think part of the problem too comes from the fact that cuddling is not considered a "learned profession." While there are pros who have had formal training, it's not mandated nor are there any regulations or required certifications for this industry. Maybe someday there will be, I don't know. But right now, it is more like my field ... you can take all kinds of classes to be a writer or an artist, but there's no requirement. As long as you are doing it for pay (and someone has paid you), you're considered a professional, including by the IRS.
The challenge is that the only way to know if a pro is not being responsible or ethical is through karma, which we all know is a flawed system similar to consumer reviews of anything. With no licensing body or impartial third party organization to judge, consumer reviews of pros and pro reviews of clients are all we have to go on. Again, that may change, but that's the world as it is now.
So I lean toward sticking with the word professional, simply because I do not think you can compare the job to one that requires a degree or certification (at this point). It is much closer to being a creative or an athlete, which are all about natural talent and a desire to get paid for that talent.
That brings us to one point where I think we are close -- should a new pro who has never done a paid session be considered a professional? Technically, no. You can write all day long, but if no one has ever paid you for your work, you're not considered a professional writer. You're an aspiring professional, at best.
Just my two cents.
@WriterGF - I know some professional slackers.
Its all in the words... both the lack there of, and the OP's post.
Personal experience and hurt are one thing...I would have (and have in the past) felt empathy toward well written genuinely heart felt posts with this subject matter but this post wasn't written in a way that makes me feel the poster has an empathetic hurting heart.
I'm saying the language doesn't even come across as righteous indignation which would be in my opinion way better than the language in this post. I'm sure the OP didn't intend to send out the vibes he did. Alas, better words often evade us when we are wounded so deeply. Crossing my fingers hoping beyond hope that the OP gets the precisely the amount of attention he deserves.
It is hard for me to see this other than entitled pro bashing and an attempt to stir the pot BUT....
I'm going to give the OP the benefit of the doubt and say that was not his intent. He's not intentionally throwing out those vibes. He may have a hard time expressing himself in a more persuasive less brash manner. He deserves exactly the amount of empathy due to someone who writes such a post. Hugs! Have a great one!
P.S. I'm including the OP's later comments in my assessment.