There are three basic ways people initially know you on here: your profile, your forum posts (if any), and your karma (if any). We already know karma is not 100% reliable, but the other two are crafted by you.
So it's wise, when you get hacked off about something, to maybe look around the site, see if there are other people with the same issue, or do a topic that amounts to "I'm confused about this, how is this supposed to work and what is the norm?"
Complaining, pro-bashing, preaching can rapidly become your brand and discourage people from wanting to do the very thing you desire: cuddling with you.
@WriterGF - The profile isn't reliable either. They can describe themself as "respectful" then blowup when somebody rejects them. Reading their forum posts is the best bet IMO.
@Mike403 Point taken.
@Mike403 Yes, often people don’t follow what’s even in their own profile.
If it’s well written and looks like a lot of effort went into it, that’s usually a good indicator that a person is serious about what they wrote
I absolutely love it when people want a pros attention, can't get it then complain and say "pros" as such in a post. Kinda like your distain shows. And then so will mine. Also, funny how so many people have so many preferences on how they are responded to. Seems like it will never be good enough for someone.
@stormydaycuddle I’m hoping it’s a problem with the loud minority, and most of the average users just don’t make noise one way or another. Then again CC is kinda niche so maybe a normal user is actually the minority
@Mike403
They can describe themself as "respectful" then blowup when somebody rejects them.
One of my philosophies is if you have to say it, you ain't it. So it's reasonable to assume that someone who feels the need to describe themself as respectful probably isn't.
@sunnysideup Personally, I love getting messages from almost everyone I encounter. So I think the distain isn't usual just loud.
Is courtesy free? Like most things in life, it depends on the context.
Does it cost me anything to hold the door open for someone in a wheel chair or someone who has their arms full - other than a few seconds of my time, that courtesy is free. Does it cost me anything to smile and say thank you or good morning to the housekeeping staff at a hotel? Of course not. In these examples, courtesy is free.
But do I respond to every direct message I receive on Twitter or LinkedIn? Of course not. I know >80% of those messages are from scammers. And while some messages are from real people, they are offering me services I don’t want such as offers to review my retirement planning or my resume or my business website or marketing plan, etc. I don’t send them rude responses (unless the same person messages me repeatedly) I simply ignore them and go about my day.
I do respond to everyone who messages me on CC but I only average about 1 message a month from someone I haven’t met before. Some of those messages have turned into meaningful conversations and friendship with men I share things in common with or with women enthusiasts I look forward to meeting and cuddling in the near future.
But that is my experience onCC. If I was receiving numerous direct messages per day (like I do on Twitter and LinkedIn) I would probably have to ignore some due to time constraints.
@cuddlefaery 🙋🏻♀️
These venting posts almost never goes well for the OP.
Agreed, and I find the ones who have to tell the world how "nice" they are rarely are.
"And any man who must say 'I am king' is no true king at all." - George R.R. Martin
Actions hold value, not words.
@Mike403 We don't really expect someone's profile to state " I tend to turn aggressive when rejected or ignored", Right?
@sooson too honest for most people. I feel like handing out thesauruses and dictionaries on almost a daily basis. "Vindictive" Is a good one.
@stormydaycuddle 🤣🤣🤣🥰
Some non-responses (or responses that don't lead to a session) may feel like rejections and some may not but that's ok. A man should expect most attempts to be rejected; it is almost statistically guaranteed. And let's not forget it's much easier being a man than being a woman on these online platforms (See comments from @AllAboutSoul) Also, requesting/expecting an explanation as to why she won't cuddle you is a sign of weakness, and if you do ask for an explanation and actually get one, you may regret asking. best course of action is to assume she's concerned she's not good enough for you and move on . and besides, who know what she's been reading before she got to my message and now, she's like "yea right, another one of those. next. "
Just be kind courteous, polite and try to maintain a pristine and immaculate online presence as I do and success will follow.
@taco_libre If we're talking Gen Zs at the drive thru window than yes 100%....
@stormydaycuddle If that was an attempt to teach me English than it is truly appreciated! keep doing that and you might earn a free cuddle session with me. Also, now that your brought up Vindictive, would you believe me if I told you I got canceled/banned by a pro for seeing other pros?? it may not be common, but it does happen.
Anyways on to brats and beer
"I'm a nice guy"
"What? You still won't go out with me? What a b****".
Along with other very colorful things that will most likely put me on a timeout if I post it here.
@Sooson thank you for your comment. I’ve been looking for something to write in my about me section and your comment really inspired me so I added it to my profile!
@Sooson - A pro dropped you as a client for seeing another pro? I never heard that one before. You aren't dating them.
@Mike403 Yes lol.seriously . Yes I know .and there's nothing about that situation I personally would mind sharing but I learned it is not welcomed here even though the person is no longer on the platform.
The one post and done complaint threads followed by pages of responses from others with no responses or follow ups from the OP have always fascinated me
@Sooson @others I'm actually glad Denver doesn't have the competitive vibe. The pros here seem to be supportive of each other. I send people elsewhere when they need a cuddle and I'm not free frequently. I've heard it does happen on occasion elsewhere. But straight out dumping you... I'm trying not to laugh. (not in a mean way) I'm sorry that's not fun. I don't know what Denver would do without the pros we have. @justjennn @Hugginghealer @MissAdventurous and others.
@stormydaycuddle by all means, laugh. It's all good. I laughed myself when I got the ban notification.
@Sooson - There's a ban notification from pro cuddlers?
@Mike403 lol no, it was done over a personal line, and I simply respected her wishes and stopped contacting her
@Mike403 "I'm a nice guy" 99% of the time sounds like someone who has spent too much time in incel/pick up artist/men's rights activists groups. The other 1% of the time they're in danger of getting recruited. It's either coded language, trying too hard to portray what they think women want, or showing lack of self awareness.
@JohnR1972 one thing to consider....true courtesy ought be offered to everyone equally, not just those you deem in need of aid based off of snap visual judgements. Often the people who need that kindness the most show it the least, and people who fit the stereotypes get tired of people trying to white knight for them. I encourage people to truly think about treating people equitably and not making assumptions based off of our biases. People in wheelchairs do not always need assistance. People who smile the brightest often are hiding the worst pain. Anyone could do with a bit of kindness to brighten their day from a stranger even if they don't show it.
I'm just a dick to everyone. No exceptions
I found this thread took a look into the world of some women's inboxes.
I find it fascinating. I would watch a 5 part Hulu documentary on the inboxes of women. The tea would keep me up for days. Lol ☕
https://www.cuddlecomfort.com/forum/discussion/15168/women-cuddlers-how-many-messages-do-you-get-per-week/p1
@pmvines It's very noticeable. Funny, he wants to give unsolicited advice, but hides from the responses. IMHO, he's just as rude as the pros he's admonishing and "educating."
@cuddlefaery - There may be regional and/or generational differences in social norms about holding doors for people. I live in the Midwest and I grew up in the 1970s. I’ve had a few women (who usually appear to be between 30-40) complain about me holding a door for them but the vast majority simply say “thank you” or say nothing. I also hold doors open for men but I’ve never once had a man complain about it.
And before anyone asks, I am sure I have held doors for other people as well because I hold doors for anyone in close proximity to me when I am going through a doorway. Black, White, Asian, Hispanic, young, middle aged, elderly, Democrat, Republican, Independent, those wearing BLM t-shirts and those wearing MAGA hats, it doesn’t matter - I try to be courteous to everyone. If someone wants to second guess my intentions, that is on them. I’m not going to stop because someone thinks I am being a chauvinist or “white knighting”.
However, if I am half way across a room from a door and I see someone with their arms full or who appears they might need assistance (yes, I do make “snap visual judgements” in this circumstance rather than waiting and watching someone with an infant in one arm and a diaper bag in the other struggle to open a door) I will go out of my way and walk to the door to offer assistance. If they tell me they don’t need assistance I immediately stop, but the VAST majority simply say “thank you”.
If this makes me a “white knight” then so be it.
@JohnR1972 that was an elegant response to a snap judgement.
@JohnR1972 very well said. Whatever happened to just being a decent human being? This is something that has truly gotten out of control. The idea that trying to do something nice would backfire because you didn't consider some twisted social construct is just completely backwards.