Unapproachable make up

[Deleted User]MaverickLegend (deleted user)
in General

Apparently, this is some sort of trend and Some sort of deterrent against men by making women look unapproachable. personally find this somewhat ridiculous since I don’t know how a man is supposed to tell the difference between regular make up and unapproachable make up. And even if a man can tell the difference, is this really supposed to be a deterrent? 😂🤷🏻‍♂️

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Comments

  • TxTomTxTom

    Interesting. I've never heard this before. What is unapproachable make-up?

  • SunsetSnugglesSunsetSnuggles

    I never wear make-up. Must be doin' it wrong. 😁

    ~ Sunset Snuggles

  • PrettyLuvPrettyLuv

    Whaaaaa? There’s really such a thing?

  • [Deleted User]WriterGF (deleted user)
    edited September 2023

    According to what I saw online, it involves using heavy makeup to make a woman look harsh and intimidating ... ignoring the fact, it seems, that some men are more attracted to women who look harsh and intimidating.

  • CelestialTouchCelestialTouch

    I googled it, I really dont see a difference... maybe might ward off insects like mosquitos though if you use makeup on arms and legs 🤔.

  • KaaGeeKaaGee

    Apparently I always look intimidating, and hardly ever wear make up....
    Maybe I should market that

  • SouthernDollSouthernDoll
    edited September 2023

    Wow 😮 people never fail to amaze me at what random things they will make a fashion trend/fad 😂 this is definitely an interesting approach on warding off other people !!!

    ~ Happy Cuddling Everyone ~

  • CuddleDuncanCuddleDuncan Mod

    What a brilliant idea by the makeup marketing people.

    If a woman really wants to achieve this with makeup, I would suggest more than a hint of a moustache, with an infected shaving nick.

  • [Deleted User]DFGH1982 (deleted user)

    Unapproachable is really subjective, and not based on the woman at all, but rather the confidence of the one approaching.

  • [Deleted User]CharlesInWI (deleted user)
    edited September 2023

    For men, this is simple.

    Don’t approach women.

    Especially in our current culture where approaching can easily be seen as harassing, with serious social and legal repercussions.

    It is clear that, with some rare exceptions, the vast majority of women don’t want, or even like, men.

    According to data from dating apps 95% of women find 80% of men unattractive by every blind survey, and by actual data usage (“swiping”, “liking”, and responding to messages) on dating/social apps such as Tinder, OKCupid, Bumble, Cuddle Comfort, etc.

    So, for men that aren’t “high value”, that is to say, model good-looking, rich, and/or famous, the best we can do is enjoy our own lives.

    Dive into your career.

    Be passionate about your hobbies.

    Invest in your own friend groups of men.

    Volunteer your time.

    Focus on self-care.

    Don’t waste your time and energy on pursuing women.

    Certainly don’t waste your money.

    If you have to ask them, chase them, that is already your answer.

  • AllAboutSoulAllAboutSoul

    Spot on @DFGH1982 ! I can look intimidating without any makeup, because well, I don't wear makeup! I'm pretty sure that my makeup skills would be more clownish than fierce.

  • [Deleted User]QueensCurryPuff (deleted user)

    @CharlesInWI - I vastly disagree. I find this ignorant of why women defensive the moment we leave the house.

    There's a really great survey and I'm sure women here can add to it - How old were you when you were first sexualised?

    Most are in their single digits. Majority actually and the others arent far off in numbers.

    I also think men do not put as much into their appearance as women are expected to, with groomed, clothes, skin, hair - I have swiped for women on a friend's app and the pictures alone make it apparent how little effort men put into presenting themselves.

    One can just be defensive as write off women, or realise that courtship is something that involves more than what they're doing.

  • [Deleted User]kitty_kittycat (deleted user)

    I do see wearing make up as a decision someone makes (women, men, whoever). Defined artistic make up can be scary if that’s the main purpose but if that’s the case you can tell it’s probably for Halloween.

    Some men are really picky with that fact that someone wear or not make up (some of them like it some others hate it) at the end of the day you’re not wearing it so mind your business 😅

    There are more fishes in the sea 🌊

  • OliveGreenOliveGreen

    Make up is worn by individuals (yes, men too) to make themselves feel a way about themselves. There is a multitude of reasons why someone chooses to wear make up. It could be to attract, it could be the only way they feel comfortable in their skin while they're out or staying in. It could be because they're expressing themselves in the best way they know how. There's a multitude of reasons but there could also be no reason. It could just be a part of their process for the day, like brushing your hair and styling it.

    I've worked in the modeling industry, I have beautiful, fierce, heavy makeup wearing friends/coworkers. I've worked in night clubs, bars and countless eventvenues. Never have I ever heard of someone wearing makeup to repel others. The way people present themselves has absolutely nothing to do with you. The last reason someone puts makeup on, clothes on, showers, cares for themselves and present themselves has nothing to do with you.

    The nicest, most approachable person could be behind a a simple line of mascara or a full face of makeup that took them hours to do every day. If you feel intimidated or repelled by someone wearing make up that is a you problem.

  • OliveGreenOliveGreen

    @DFGH1982 beautifully said.

  • Nina_LuNina_Lu

    Some girls look amazing in makeup, whereas I look ridiculous. I have big features {which I'm not complaining about) so I need to apply makeup with a very light hand. No amount of makeup will make me look intimidating.

  • TheFunCartelTheFunCartel

    @QueensCurryPuff 💯

    @CharlesInWI One day, when you find yourself in a jovial mood or when you have met a female despite saying you never will, please read your post again. It reeks of bitterness. Bitterness is far more unattractive than looks or economic class. In addition one survey of a few hundred women does not define the billions of women of women who walk this planet. As far as happiness, I am not saying fake it till you
    make it, but maybe examine how you portray yourself to the world at large. Everyone has been down on themselves at some time but most do not allow it to become them. As @QueensCurryPuff alludes to, maybe put an effort into your portrayal of yourself because bitterness is hard to approach for most people as no one knows how it will manifest in any given person. You are entitled to feel the way you feel, but you are sending out signals that are very self-destructive and lumping half the world into a box.

    I understand if you want to tell me to go get f’d, but I know you are wiser than the post you just made.

  • [Deleted User]CharlesInWI (deleted user)

    @QueensCurryPuff

    The best thing about the “Don’t Approach” Rule is that it also acknowledges, and respects, women’s desire to feel safe in public spaces.

    Of course women feel vulnerable. I would never argue otherwise.

    And, while I am not personally responsible for someone’s feelings, or the culture we are in, or the past experiences someone has had to lead to those feelings, I can be aware of all of that in a general way.

    And I can respect it by simply not approaching women.

    As to courtship… That no longer exists in any form I understand, and so, for the reasons you have expressed, and my own experiences, I simply don’t approach.

    If someone, woman or man or anywhere on the spectrums, is interested in me they can approach me.

    And if that never happens, my life is still my life.

    Which, the occasional loneliness aside, is mostly good.

    Or, as good as it can be given the state of the world.

  • TheFunCartelTheFunCartel

    I also think men do not put as much into their appearance as women are expected to, with groomed, clothes, skin, hair - I have swiped for women on a friend's app and the pictures alone make it apparent how little effort men put into presenting themselves.

    @QueensCurryPuff I can tell you that you are correct. Most men do not put much effort into their appearance, and many need to be prodded about their hygiene. These same men will ridicule a woman for dressing down (wearing casual athletic wear) in public or going without make-up. My fellow males sometimes make me cringe.

  • sunnysideupsunnysideup

    @OliveGreen I think that’s well said, make-up is like clothes. What people wear and why they wear it has different reasons. And some people wear none at all!

    @CharlesInWI as a guy who has struggled with dating, I empathize with this. Women treated me far worse than the guys did in high school and in my first job. I was socially awkward and the women hated me, but the guys were always nice. there was a time where I thought only ‘supermen’ could date women. I see it a bit differently now. People either like you or they don’t. Focusing on yourself makes you more likeable. I’ve been surprised by a few pleasant encounters when approaching women.

    @QueensCurryPuff I also agree with you as well! I’ve heard so much from the horrible experiences so many women have had with men, and the countermeasures they’ve learned were necessary to keep those bad experiences at bay. Also with the looks thing, I often heard that the guys were too boring or too creepy, or just didn’t vibe (as to why a date didn’t work out), but usually looks aren’t the principle complaint. I guess for online profiles that’s all you have to judge someone by. I guess the in person dates your friend and other women went on, their physical presentation stood out from the other profiles.

  • TxTomTxTom
    edited September 2023

    @CharlesInWI

    Focus on self-care.

    You know what? You should go out and buy yourself a good quality pair of handsome leather shoes. They will improve your mood, and, looking quite dapper now, you'll be filled with confidence. And who isn't attracted to confidence?

    When you feel good about yourself, you'll get out more, and that's beneficial in its own way.

    Men don't focus on footwear anymore. And when going out and about we have a tendency, myself excluded, of course, to look rather slovenly.

    When you invest in some good, quality footwear, the rest of your wardrobe will just naturally follow suit. You will look quite distinguished and you'll easily set yourself apart from those other guys who can't seem to keep their pants from sliding down their rear.

    A good, quality pair of shoes really stand out, and can be a good conversation starter, too.

    You may find that women approach you now. And why wouldn't they? They value someone who takes pride in their appearance just as much as anyone else. Your appearance says a lot about you; it's a reflection of your personality, and your inner well-being.

    And it can all start with just a handsome pair of good quality leather shoes.

  • [Deleted User]CharlesInWI (deleted user)

    @TxTom

    How long have you managed that Florsheim location?

    😉

  • TheFunCartelTheFunCartel

    @CharlesInWI 🤣

  • JohnR1972JohnR1972

    @QueensCurryPuff

    How old were you when you were first sexualised?

    I am asking this in all sincerity, did that survey ask about who sexualized them?

    The reason I ask is a bad experience with a co-worker at a previous employer. A co-worker had a screen saver on her company computer that consisted of 20-30 images of her 6 year old daughter in “beauty contests”. The 6 year old was wearing makeup, had her hair styled, was wearing a very small bikini and striking provocative poses.

    In my opinion, the daughter was being sexualized by her own mother with images that bordered on CP. A male co-worker asked her to change her screen saver because he thought it was inappropriate (I agreed with him) and she blew up up at him yelling across the office so everyone could hear her as she called him a pervert for thinking of her daughter in a sexual way.

  • TxTomTxTom

    @CharlesInWI
    :+1: Nice!!

    See? You're mood has improved already, and you've only thought about shoes.

  • cuddlefaerycuddlefaery

    This trend and conversation reminds me of the viral TikTok makeup video (and then the trend that uses its audio) of contouring and pterodactyls.... on the surface it's a silly video for laughs, but if you really think about what it's saying it hits kinda hard. And then every time you hear the audio you giggle anyway 🤣 The creator is kind of a genius.

    https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZT82DQuRD/

    Edit: Today I learned the audio is actually edited from this YouTube video, so want to link for proper credit! It has more adult language, but it's even more relevant in full length 🤣

  • TxTomTxTom

    @cuddlefaery
    Very insightful about the pterodactyls. I didn't realize women knew about that.

  • SunsetSnugglesSunsetSnuggles

    @cuddlefaery That voiceover girl is batshit crazy...I love it! 😂

    ~ Sunset Snuggles

  • [Deleted User]cuddlewithKyle (deleted user)

    @CuddleDuncan you always give me a little laugh

  • CuddleHugs01234CuddleHugs01234

    Made me laugh too, @CuddleDuncan

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