Some of you ol' folks probably remember me and you new folk hello! This is just a little update about me and how my time has been for me here so far. I suppose it's also to maybe give a ray of hope to anyone struggling or you get to benefit from reading it in someway or another.
What I've been up to and what's up:
So I've been away for a good minute, which I'm getting right back to soon because I got a whole lot going on. I'm okay though, so no worries!
I've been keeping so busy with life and all its ups and downs. Luckily that kept me going just fine for quite sometime and I'm still going strong enough. Although, I'm unavailable to chat much, let alone meet anyone, I've recently after about a year or so of practically no in person interactions with anyone let alone a hug, started feeling a need for that warm embrace.
Because of this, that and the other and really no fault of anyone, me finding a cuddle partner here has been quite sparse, let alone getting to have a repeat connection with someone. So I've also not gotten much messages from guys all these years, although I wasn't really here in the winter months.
So about a day ago, I thought I come check out the forum, and just see around a bit. I did miss getting to interact with many of you after all. Then, I must've forgot to set my settings to not allow new messages or deactivate my account given that I wasn't ready to really talk or meet anyone. Though I came back today to look at the forum and found I've gotten about 8 messages from guys in like a day! I've never in my 6 years here had that happen. The most I'd gotten were maybe about once or twice a month or every other month or so, which for one reason or another many of them didn't go anywhere or we met once and that was it.
Now fast forward, I was so surprised to see I've gotten about 8 messages. Although, if I was ready to converse with them I think only about 2 at most would probably lead to meeting in person, because of our conflicting needs and filters. Though still I feel happy and I find it to be a nice surprise.
Side note: I'm still gonna be responding to them to let them know of my unavailability and thank them for reaching out.
I'm not really sure why today was the first in years that I had this happen. Though it seems nice and I think you just might find what you seek when you least expect it too. I'm disabled for those who don't know and I'm just looking for public cuddles, which sets me apart from many women. Hence a big part of why I get much less messages than women who don't have such factors at play and why I'm surprised now. Also just a side note, women getting many messages doesn't necessarily mean they are quality messages and from men who respect boundaries and what the site is about. So I find that while different some men barely getting responses, a lot of women struggle in their own ways here too. This is something I might write more about someday and get y'all's thoughts on it too.
Anyway, I stayed a member of this site because I've been hopeful that no matter how difficult, I just might find what I seek. At some point I got really tired of the rejections which I blame nobody for. Though they took a toll on me nonetheless especially those who were rude or quite mean about it. I too rejected my fair share when we weren't on the same page. So I understand that's just life and given how broke I am, I'm not looking to start a pity party about it lol. Nonetheless, I in part needed a break from it. I'm more of the opinion that when I'm trying to reach goals and things get so tough, I take a break rather than stop pursuing said goals.
The power of close friendships, and relationship:
I got busy with other aspects of my life and for sometime I got into an unplanned long distance relationship, which helped with the lack of physical contact, because it provided me good emotional connection. Yay me, right?
Although I've a friend or two and acquaintances here and there, who I enjoy speaking or spending time with. I've overtime learned that there are some people who when I speak with, they just connect with me so well emotionally. Unlike my friendships which are more activity based, with some people I can effortlessly talk with for an hour or more, which helps me to feel a whole lot better. Like, I can take over the world kind of better. This is especially the case when it is with people I really feel accepted by, which my friends are a part of said people. Perhaps this is in part also due to my ambivert nature in which I can go quite a while without really talking with anyone. So when I finally get to speak with someone with whom I've a good connection, the experience is amplified. Rather than being an extravert who is often socializing or has a greater need for more frequent socialization.
Such connections or friendships certainly don't replace my needs for caring platonic hugs or cuddles. Though I've found having them satisfies me about 65% or prolongs my ability to more comfortably go without platonic physical contact much longer than I can otherwise. So just maybe if you're struggling to find platonic cuddle partners, finding friends who you can so well connect with emotionally can help. I know such people may not be easy to find either. Though I think finding them is well worth the effort if that's what you need. While this post isn't particularly about tips to cope with touch deprivation or loneliness, feel free to share any tips you've found helpful. Or if you've been on a similar journey that you'd like to share with us. I'm hoping to stay around and chat with y'all on the forum for a few days before I deactivate.
Here and there I had rough times which took a toll on me. Though, through it all I've been doing what I can to take care of myself and set myself up for success. I hope that things get better for you all and that you find joy that stays with you for a long time. ☺️
I'm including a little poll to check in on how y'all are doing, so feel free to take part in it if you'd like. 🫂